Reviews from

Steve's Story-Poems

Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Something there is..."
A collection of my poems

95 total reviews 
Comment from guinea
Excellent
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A poem of murder I think. Shows deep thinking. The imagery is great. Your words flow smoothly. The picture goes well with it.

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you.
    Steve
Comment from twinklepoems
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What blasphemy Kiwistevah! Defiling the sacred Woods poem in such a spooky and gruesome way. I was entranced while you defiled this lovely poem with death and deception. How clever for the little horse to warn his master but to no avail! You will have miles to go before you are safe to sleep! I loved it!

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thanks for the great review.
    Steve
Comment from Bina1
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What a fine terror you write here! It gets colder, the deeper you go! Very visual, with a nice pace and rhyme. Thank you for sharing, I think. Congratulations on being "Recognized" as "All Time Best", a fine poem.

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you.
    Steve
Comment from kra-z-ka-z
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I thoroughly enjoyed the bit about sleeping beneath the lake. I could see the horse and rider falling through the ice unaware that it was even there. Dark? Yes. Entertaining? YES!

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Hmmm - don't know if you quite got this tale of murder and revenge, but thanks for reading...
    Steve
reply by kra-z-ka-z on 21-Jul-2012
    I pretty much got it...but i read it again and REALLY got it!
Comment from Bobbi22
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Sorry, but I'm not familiar with Robert Frost's poem - it has been a very long time since I have read any of his works. Your poem is very well written, giving the alternate vision.

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you - here is the original.ve

    Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening
    Whose woods these are I think I know.
    His house is in the village though;
    He will not see me stopping here
    To watch his woods fill up with snow.

    My little horse must think it queer
    To stop without a farmhouse near
    Between the woods and frozen lake
    The darkest evening of the year.

    He gives his harness bells a shake
    To ask if there is some mistake.
    The only other sound's the sweep
    Of easy wind and downy flake.

    The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
    But I have promises to keep,
    And miles to go before I sleep,
    And miles to go before I sleep.
    Ste
Comment from Doc Holiday
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You and Frosty both are a little creepy with this piece.
Nice tongue and cheek dark write based upon the Stopping By Woods on a Snowing Evening and now I'll just take my nap....

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you.
    Steve
Comment from dmt1967
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Its a nice poem I like it never read the original though but I like the one you have written betrayal is the worst thing one human being can do to another human being its like saying you trusted me sucker thank you for sharing

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you - here is the original...
    Steve

    Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening
    Whose woods these are I think I know.
    His house is in the village though;
    He will not see me stopping here
    To watch his woods fill up with snow.

    My little horse must think it queer
    To stop without a farmhouse near
    Between the woods and frozen lake
    The darkest evening of the year.

    He gives his harness bells a shake
    To ask if there is some mistake.
    The only other sound's the sweep
    Of easy wind and downy flake.

    The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
    But I have promises to keep,
    And miles to go before I sleep,
    And miles to go before I sleep.
Comment from S.Yocom
Excellent
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This is an excellent take-off of the Frost poem, Steve. (And yes, Stopping by Woods" is one of my favorite poems.) I like the fact that you even used the Frostean rhyme scheme. I enjoyed reading your clever poem.
Sally

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you, Sally - I enjoyed subverting this classic - I found the rhyme scheme a little tricky actually...
    Steve
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
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Well, I like it - the content,
which is mysterious - the words,
rhythm and rhyme, all excellent.
And great picture... so what
else can there be!!

Margaret

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thanks, Margaret.
    Steve
Comment from Nanette Mary
Excellent
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Hullo Kiwisteveh ....

Well - I was not aware of others making a fuss about that to which you refer but I did enjoy reading what you have written. You also have a fine black-and-white picture to grace the top of this work.
There is nothing to suggest changing and I thank you for sharing this with us.
Love from .... Nanette Mary.

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
    Thank you NM - I suspect a few people didn't approve of me messing with Frost's famous and much=loved poem.
    Steve

    Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening
    Whose woods these are I think I know.
    His house is in the village though;
    He will not see me stopping here
    To watch his woods fill up with snow.

    My little horse must think it queer
    To stop without a farmhouse near
    Between the woods and frozen lake
    The darkest evening of the year.

    He gives his harness bells a shake
    To ask if there is some mistake.
    The only other sound's the sweep
    Of easy wind and downy flake.

    The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
    But I have promises to keep,
    And miles to go before I sleep,
    And miles to go before I sleep.
reply by Nanette Mary on 20-Aug-2012
    Thank you, Kiwisteveh ... for taking the trouble to type out those four beautiful
    verses which I really enjoyed reading ... especially visualising, as I did, the little Horse. Love - N.M.