Pantoum Collection
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "The Elephant Ride"Poems written using the pantoum form
82 total reviews
Comment from brentman99
A nice poem with a touching picture. The subject is a good one as there is a cost beyond payment when we buy our tourist rides. Interesting to consider.
Thanks for sharing, Brent.
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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A nice poem with a touching picture. The subject is a good one as there is a cost beyond payment when we buy our tourist rides. Interesting to consider.
Thanks for sharing, Brent.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks for your kind review, Brent. Much appreciated!
Comment from Godspenswept
I enjoy this style of poetry...
Really captured the emotions of what an elephant could go through with people jumping off and on his back all day...
Very well written...and a pleasure to read
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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I enjoy this style of poetry...
Really captured the emotions of what an elephant could go through with people jumping off and on his back all day...
Very well written...and a pleasure to read
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks for your kind review, Godspenwept. Much appreciated!
Comment from SteveY
Wow, this one is just so sad and good and true. A very insightful little piece of writing that you've got here my friend. Way to go with this one.
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Wow, this one is just so sad and good and true. A very insightful little piece of writing that you've got here my friend. Way to go with this one.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks for your kind review, Steve. Much appreciated!
Comment from NicciFaye
I really enjoyed the persepctive of this poem. I like the view you've allowed the reader to understand the from the vision of the elephant and this deity that a lot of people worship in certain culutres and the weary livelyhood the elephant endures to satisfy a toursit. Very interesting piece. This is excpectionally well written.
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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I really enjoyed the persepctive of this poem. I like the view you've allowed the reader to understand the from the vision of the elephant and this deity that a lot of people worship in certain culutres and the weary livelyhood the elephant endures to satisfy a toursit. Very interesting piece. This is excpectionally well written.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks, Nicci, for your kind review! There is some great work being done in elephant sanctuaries up in Thailand but until the mass of visiting tourists transfer their allegiance to these the almighty tourist dollar will continue to sustain the elephant trekking business. It is a matter of re-education largely. That is one of the reasons my daughter was up there.
Comment from ElPoetry001
Excellent metaphor.
And so it goes in life as some must bear the burden of many, and not be rewarded with the dollar but scratching for the penny.
As the Government argues about the money they must be allowed to spend each day, workers are more limited as to pay. Employers don't want to provide employee insurance, so they say less hours, less pay, below the limit then insurance we do not pay.
Many jobs are demeaning and sad, yet people cry for any job, even the monotonous and the bad.
We exploit our animals and our people too, this must change but what to do?
Stop War, we will have no poor, for the money spent on wars that will never end, in lands that we do not know, where our customs will not grow, and when we leave they are happy to see us go. But one last request from them: They take a request from Oliver Twist: "More please."
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Excellent metaphor.
And so it goes in life as some must bear the burden of many, and not be rewarded with the dollar but scratching for the penny.
As the Government argues about the money they must be allowed to spend each day, workers are more limited as to pay. Employers don't want to provide employee insurance, so they say less hours, less pay, below the limit then insurance we do not pay.
Many jobs are demeaning and sad, yet people cry for any job, even the monotonous and the bad.
We exploit our animals and our people too, this must change but what to do?
Stop War, we will have no poor, for the money spent on wars that will never end, in lands that we do not know, where our customs will not grow, and when we leave they are happy to see us go. But one last request from them: They take a request from Oliver Twist: "More please."
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks, EIPoetry001, for your interesting review and interpretation of my poem!
Comment from JeanneHP
Your poem is very well written and throws a spotlight on one of my major gripes. Elephants are very intelligent, family oriented animals. If only we unintelligent people would leave them be. :-)
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Your poem is very well written and throws a spotlight on one of my major gripes. Elephants are very intelligent, family oriented animals. If only we unintelligent people would leave them be. :-)
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks, Jeanne, for your kind review and for the six-star rating! Much appreciated! There is some great work being done in elephant sanctuaries up in Thailand but until the mass of visiting tourists transfer their allegiance to these the almighty tourist dollar will continue to sustain the elephant trekking business. It is a matter of re-education largely. That is one of the reasons my daughter was up there.
Comment from Ben Colder
It is amazing how they are trained as a young one. Shackled to something they can not pull up and then when matured thinking they can not remove a small stick from the ground. Nice poem. Very interesting.
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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It is amazing how they are trained as a young one. Shackled to something they can not pull up and then when matured thinking they can not remove a small stick from the ground. Nice poem. Very interesting.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks, Ben, for your kind review! There is some great work being done in elephant sanctuaries up in Thailand but until the mass of visiting tourists transfer their allegiance to these the almighty tourist dollar will continue to sustain the elephant trekking business. It is a matter of re-education largely. That is one of the reasons my daughter was up there.
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Best wishes for your daughter and her challenge. Yes it is lack of knowledge. Regards.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
WE as humans should hang our heads in the way we have treated nature. We know not the hell those animals have to put up with. Thank you for pointing that out.
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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WE as humans should hang our heads in the way we have treated nature. We know not the hell those animals have to put up with. Thank you for pointing that out.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks, Mr+Mrs Happy Poet, for your kind review! There is some great work being done in elephant sanctuaries up in Thailand but until the mass of visiting tourists transfer their allegiance to these the almighty tourist dollar will continue to sustain the elephant trekking business. It is a matter of re-education largely. That is one of the reasons my daughter was up there.
Comment from Poetofheart2013
I really your poem about elaphants the imaging is really good. I could see them walking as I read it
Good Job
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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I really your poem about elaphants the imaging is really good. I could see them walking as I read it
Good Job
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks for your kind review, Poet of heart. Much appreciated!
Comment from sweetwoodjax
thisi s an excellent poem, tfawcus, you did an excellent job writing this pantoum poem about the dreams of the elephant that were discarded to make use of her for tourism. i enjoyed reading it
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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thisi s an excellent poem, tfawcus, you did an excellent job writing this pantoum poem about the dreams of the elephant that were discarded to make use of her for tourism. i enjoyed reading it
Comment Written 21-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2013
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Many thanks for your kind review, Sweetwoodjax. Much appreciated!