All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Not, Not, NOT!"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
51 total reviews
Comment from Curly Girly
A fun, light read. Ideal for tiny tots. Yes, if your Dad is holding your hand, you must be safe! Such fun to be small and safe.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
  |
A fun, light read. Ideal for tiny tots. Yes, if your Dad is holding your hand, you must be safe! Such fun to be small and safe.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
-
thx so much Nicole! :)S
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Very nice perspective from a childs point of view about the ocean and the sharks but daddy there to save him. always daddy is there and that makes it all right. Nice action
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Very nice perspective from a childs point of view about the ocean and the sharks but daddy there to save him. always daddy is there and that makes it all right. Nice action
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
thx Barb - you do come up with some fun stuff! :)S
Comment from JM daSilva
And you still remember you were afraid of sharks? As long as you don't let sharks touch you, sometimes you can get away. Did you know they bump into something and if they feel flesh, they eat?
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
And you still remember you were afraid of sharks? As long as you don't let sharks touch you, sometimes you can get away. Did you know they bump into something and if they feel flesh, they eat?
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
charming creatures, hmm? ikky - when I was growing up in Australia there was a spate of shark attacks - really nasty ones - all up and down the east coast of Australia
-
They are cute. If they are very small. :)
Comment from Debra White
Hi Sharyn :) You got this just right... isn't it true that our fears are magnified when we are children and their is no rationality - I love the line about the giant shark with the bigger, huger, gianter teeth! It is totally something that my 8yr old and 5yr old would come out with... and the imagination about the thunder wanting to take the child far out to sea - there's a 'bad guy' around every corner! My son actually scares himself with the things his imagination comes up with.... always better when he's on my knee or holding my hand - mums and dads are the ultimate superhero for sure.... and it's true what you say in your notes - that feelings never change (my dad is still my hero!)
I love the CAPS you use throughout. The impact perfectly.
Also liked the reference to the child's juicy legs! Yummy with scones and jam as every shark knows!
Great, I loved it, and the cute picture of you and your dad too.
No 6 allowed for you though, site has prevented it :(
Kindest regards, Debra :)
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Hi Sharyn :) You got this just right... isn't it true that our fears are magnified when we are children and their is no rationality - I love the line about the giant shark with the bigger, huger, gianter teeth! It is totally something that my 8yr old and 5yr old would come out with... and the imagination about the thunder wanting to take the child far out to sea - there's a 'bad guy' around every corner! My son actually scares himself with the things his imagination comes up with.... always better when he's on my knee or holding my hand - mums and dads are the ultimate superhero for sure.... and it's true what you say in your notes - that feelings never change (my dad is still my hero!)
I love the CAPS you use throughout. The impact perfectly.
Also liked the reference to the child's juicy legs! Yummy with scones and jam as every shark knows!
Great, I loved it, and the cute picture of you and your dad too.
No 6 allowed for you though, site has prevented it :(
Kindest regards, Debra :)
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
oh I'm so glad you liked this one Debra - I had a lot of fun with it ! :))S
Comment from Tina McKala
Wonderful photo ;)
and equally wonderful poem. The I'm not part was spot on. Nobody is as fearless as a baby, right? :) great pace and imagery, the run of thoughts of the child was genial with the sharks . :)
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Wonderful photo ;)
and equally wonderful poem. The I'm not part was spot on. Nobody is as fearless as a baby, right? :) great pace and imagery, the run of thoughts of the child was genial with the sharks . :)
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
thx tina! :)))
Comment from sunnilicious
Wonderful poem. Creative and dripping with visual imagery. You are an excellent writer that is very playful with adjectives. Enjoyable read. Great work.
Have a nice week!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Wonderful poem. Creative and dripping with visual imagery. You are an excellent writer that is very playful with adjectives. Enjoyable read. Great work.
Have a nice week!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
thx sunni - the child is never far away from me! :))Sharyn
-
God bless you always :) Alicia
Comment from DiamondGirlz61
This poem is very expressive on how ones imagination can run away with someone! Good job on seeing things through the eyes of a child and then putting it on paper in a poem form!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
This poem is very expressive on how ones imagination can run away with someone! Good job on seeing things through the eyes of a child and then putting it on paper in a poem form!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
thanks so much! :)S
Comment from MizKat
Hi Sharon,
Your poem is really cute. I enjoyed the read very much. The picture of you as a tiny tot with your dad holding onto you is really nice too.
A great job.
Hugs, Kat
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Hi Sharon,
Your poem is really cute. I enjoyed the read very much. The picture of you as a tiny tot with your dad holding onto you is really nice too.
A great job.
Hugs, Kat
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
thank you Kat - are you feeling better?
:)Sharyn
-
One day a little better, then worse again. Yesterday was fine and so far today has been too.
Thanks for caring, Kat
P.S. Sorry I keep spelling your name wrong.
Comment from ravenblack
Love your description of the waves when they hit, blue water mountain whacking your chest and then the mad tumble as if stuck in a giant washing machine. And the sharks! This rings so true. I loved to play in the waves as a child...until I saw jaws. Then every body of water was shadowed with that damn shark. Bigger, higher, gianter- good call in using child language.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Love your description of the waves when they hit, blue water mountain whacking your chest and then the mad tumble as if stuck in a giant washing machine. And the sharks! This rings so true. I loved to play in the waves as a child...until I saw jaws. Then every body of water was shadowed with that damn shark. Bigger, higher, gianter- good call in using child language.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
thx so much Ed! too busy to write or review much these last few weeks but next week should, I hope, bring sanity! :)S
Comment from trimple
Absolutely cracking poem over 80 words, detailing the mind set of a young child and how she perceives the big nasty sea LOL
Brilliant the way in which you gave sound and feeling to this excellent entry.
I wish you the best of luck
kind regards
trimple
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
|
Absolutely cracking poem over 80 words, detailing the mind set of a young child and how she perceives the big nasty sea LOL
Brilliant the way in which you gave sound and feeling to this excellent entry.
I wish you the best of luck
kind regards
trimple
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
-
has to be OVER 80 dear heart - thank you my dear - haven't seen you posting for a while?? (but me neither - busy!) :)S
-
Hey you
I have since changed it to over :)
Hope that you are keeping well in sunny Hawaii.
I took a short break from FS, back this week and trying to get into the story telling.
You may want to browse Oops, my latest bonkers tale LOL
Much love
kindest regards
tracey :)