All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 52 "Beginnings and Endings"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
105 total reviews
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
Oh what a lot of work you went to to post this, Sharyn. It has been interesting to read all your notes. It was a great poem, a sort of overview looking at the world from faraway and all us little creatures in it. Giddy
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
Oh what a lot of work you went to to post this, Sharyn. It has been interesting to read all your notes. It was a great poem, a sort of overview looking at the world from faraway and all us little creatures in it. Giddy
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
Yes indeed, Giddy - we do love to keep looking, it seems, don't we? and I wonder if we're ever any the wiser!
Blessings to you!
Sharyn
Comment from Kiki12
This is a beautiful ABAB rhyme entry. I feel like this topic has been huanting me a bit lately. Love the 3rd stanza, it's just so honest and relatable on so many levels. You always write such layered and thoughtful verses. and I have to apologize that I'm waaaay to ADD to read the author notes, I tried :) lots of great word choices here and love the beautiful metaphors, imagery and the almost child-like memories in the beginning. Well, I'm afraid we're doomed to ask these questions over and over without getting any closer to the answers.
this was very enjoyable chickie- nicely done
xo
Kiki
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
This is a beautiful ABAB rhyme entry. I feel like this topic has been huanting me a bit lately. Love the 3rd stanza, it's just so honest and relatable on so many levels. You always write such layered and thoughtful verses. and I have to apologize that I'm waaaay to ADD to read the author notes, I tried :) lots of great word choices here and love the beautiful metaphors, imagery and the almost child-like memories in the beginning. Well, I'm afraid we're doomed to ask these questions over and over without getting any closer to the answers.
this was very enjoyable chickie- nicely done
xo
Kiki
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
But we do love to go round and round asking the questions, don't we kiki? Thx so much dear - glad you enjoyed - lucky you don't need author notes to enjoy! :)))S
Comment from Righteous Riter
The writer uses the abab rhyme scheme effectively. The rhyming is good. This piece flows well as the writer does a good job of not forcing the rhymes. The photo fits this piece perfectly as this piece holds my attention from start to finish.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
The writer uses the abab rhyme scheme effectively. The rhyming is good. This piece flows well as the writer does a good job of not forcing the rhymes. The photo fits this piece perfectly as this piece holds my attention from start to finish.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
thx RR! :)S
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
A delightful read, Sharyn. I loved your choice of Artwork to complement this write.
Your poem speaks to the inner child in us all. All wanting answers and wondering what the purpose of it all is. You have expressed this so eloquently in your poem.
I especially loved your last stanza. Fave line ... "So, gyred and whorling, we're here by Design". :)
Best wishes for the contest!
bichonfrisegirl aka Connie
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
A delightful read, Sharyn. I loved your choice of Artwork to complement this write.
Your poem speaks to the inner child in us all. All wanting answers and wondering what the purpose of it all is. You have expressed this so eloquently in your poem.
I especially loved your last stanza. Fave line ... "So, gyred and whorling, we're here by Design". :)
Best wishes for the contest!
bichonfrisegirl aka Connie
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
Thank you so much Connie - I rather liked that line too!
Blessings,
Sharyn
Comment from judiverse
I'm saying 6 stars because this is so skillfully presented. You have excellent AbAb rhyme, and add to that the lovely flow of a waltz. You capture the feelings of youth--not questioning, not asking why. As one ages, however, the questions keep coming about one's place in the scheme of things. You have a great analogy comparing the tides to the tides. Comparison of life to a clock, too tightly wound is also good. Great last stanza--"created as humans with purpose divine." judi
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
I'm saying 6 stars because this is so skillfully presented. You have excellent AbAb rhyme, and add to that the lovely flow of a waltz. You capture the feelings of youth--not questioning, not asking why. As one ages, however, the questions keep coming about one's place in the scheme of things. You have a great analogy comparing the tides to the tides. Comparison of life to a clock, too tightly wound is also good. Great last stanza--"created as humans with purpose divine." judi
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
Judi, thank you so much for your lovely six on this one! So much appreciated!
Big hugs
Sharyn
-
Hi, Sharyn. You're so welcome. judi
-
Hi, Sharyn. You're so welcome. judi
Comment from Taffspride
Perfect Sharyn, and it fits perfectly to a waltzed timing.
I loved the images in it, and particularly liked this verse.
I know that in circles we'll spiral tonight,
as we in our universe grow and expand,
where love's all that matters and we bask in light-
in all of creation we'll feel Spirit's Hand.
Here I imagined dancers in flowing gowns waltzing in spirals within a circle. (if that makes sense).
Great poem thanks for sharing.
Iechyd da
Ann
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
Perfect Sharyn, and it fits perfectly to a waltzed timing.
I loved the images in it, and particularly liked this verse.
I know that in circles we'll spiral tonight,
as we in our universe grow and expand,
where love's all that matters and we bask in light-
in all of creation we'll feel Spirit's Hand.
Here I imagined dancers in flowing gowns waltzing in spirals within a circle. (if that makes sense).
Great poem thanks for sharing.
Iechyd da
Ann
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
I had fun with the dance rhythm in this one, Ann - am trying to come up with some music now - it was a piece I needed to complete one of my monologues and I've been putting it off for way too long! Thx so much my dear, as always!
Best wishes & big hugs
Sharyn
Comment from Charlene0513
To visionary1234,
This is a very good synopsis about our walk and the choices we take in our lifetime.
It's veracity is summed up in this quatrain:
But now that I'm older, I ask what's my place?
And life goes around in birth, marriage and death.
I look in the mirror now, look at my face,
And wonder what happens 'tween first and last breath.
Charlene
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
To visionary1234,
This is a very good synopsis about our walk and the choices we take in our lifetime.
It's veracity is summed up in this quatrain:
But now that I'm older, I ask what's my place?
And life goes around in birth, marriage and death.
I look in the mirror now, look at my face,
And wonder what happens 'tween first and last breath.
Charlene
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
thx so much Charlene!
:)Sharyn
Comment from zeldasmith
After reading your notes the poetry came into play. I love the waltzing part. I could imagine someone singing and playing a stringed instrument while couples waltzed about. Good job. I think I get more out of the authors notes on FS because I learn stuff. Great writing. Loved it.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
After reading your notes the poetry came into play. I love the waltzing part. I could imagine someone singing and playing a stringed instrument while couples waltzed about. Good job. I think I get more out of the authors notes on FS because I learn stuff. Great writing. Loved it.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
So glad I put them there then Zelda - I love it when people are curious!
Blessings,
Sharyn
Comment from God's Writer
Great poem. Taking a break from writing and thought I would see what everyone is up too. I am doing great. Thank you for this very creative poem.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
Great poem. Taking a break from writing and thought I would see what everyone is up too. I am doing great. Thank you for this very creative poem.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
Well hi there Jill - I'm always amazed at how prolific you are! I'm lucky to get out a piece or two a WEEK! What are you up to? any plans with Erick? and how is he doing? I'm focusing a little more on fiction at the moment, so having lots of fun experimenting!
:)Sharyn
-
This is Erick. I had a little time in my writing schedule, so stopped by to say hi. We are still working on getting together to be married. I have my second book done and will be starting the third one soon. I hope you and your husband are fine. Tell him hi for me.
Shalom,
Erick
-
oh lovely to hear from you Erick and I'm so delighted for both you and Jill! Blessings to you both and big hugs, ok? How's your neck doing?
-
Still gets a little sore, but I am in no real pain. Just my hands still hurt. I am finding ways to deal with it.
Comment from GregoryCody
Again very pretty. I can hear it in my head my head now. Your descriptions, flow are incredible. As always. I really love your choices of words and the format. So beautifully done. Again.
the incoming tides just the breath of the ocean
and these tides will turn, and then turn once again.
Beautiful...
I'm going to put it in my next piece, word for word. Kidding. It is Fantasdtic though
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
Again very pretty. I can hear it in my head my head now. Your descriptions, flow are incredible. As always. I really love your choices of words and the format. So beautifully done. Again.
the incoming tides just the breath of the ocean
and these tides will turn, and then turn once again.
Beautiful...
I'm going to put it in my next piece, word for word. Kidding. It is Fantasdtic though
Comment Written 23-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
-
Bless you Greg - now I expect to hear a song from you next, right??? Put on your dancing shoes young man!
:)S