Crumbling Foundations
5/7/5 Site Contest56 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
This is a great presentation, Mrs. KT. Your syllable count is correct per line and the rhymes are an added bonus. Your message is clear, too. I like the comparison between the old doors and dreams . . .then you expand it to include dreams still awaiting possibly to come true. Your image choice is a good match to your well-chosen words. Thanks for sharing and best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
This is a great presentation, Mrs. KT. Your syllable count is correct per line and the rhymes are an added bonus. Your message is clear, too. I like the comparison between the old doors and dreams . . .then you expand it to include dreams still awaiting possibly to come true. Your image choice is a good match to your well-chosen words. Thanks for sharing and best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Jan,
These short poems are challenging.
Glad you enjoyed.
Thank you!
diane
Comment from Mastery
Excellent 5-7-5 here Diane. I do realize however that you never post anything but the best poetry though. Good luck in the contest..I think it is a winner for sure, myn friend.
(Liked this closing line btw:
"Unhinged dreams lurk near...
:) Bob
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Excellent 5-7-5 here Diane. I do realize however that you never post anything but the best poetry though. Good luck in the contest..I think it is a winner for sure, myn friend.
(Liked this closing line btw:
"Unhinged dreams lurk near...
:) Bob
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello Bob,
So pleased you enjoyed!
Thank you!
diane
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You are most welcome Di. :) Bob
Comment from Drew Delaney
A great simile used here. Old doors, like old fears! The entire wording gives a brilliant message. Love the term ... unhinged dreams lurk here. Fear can destabilize a person's life Completely. Nice poem!
Drew xx
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
A great simile used here. Old doors, like old fears! The entire wording gives a brilliant message. Love the term ... unhinged dreams lurk here. Fear can destabilize a person's life Completely. Nice poem!
Drew xx
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello Drew!
Glad you enjoyed!
diane
Comment from Margaret Bednar
Dreams lurk? I understand the doors and fears lurking but I'm not sure lurk pairs with dreams quite so well. I know what you are trying to say - hard to find a single syllable word to fit. I thought of several two syllable words !
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Dreams lurk? I understand the doors and fears lurking but I'm not sure lurk pairs with dreams quite so well. I know what you are trying to say - hard to find a single syllable word to fit. I thought of several two syllable words !
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello Margaret!
Thank you!
diane
Comment from LisaMay
Perfect illustration to go with your thought-provoking poem. The imagery of your 'unhinged dreams' is powerful... 'lurk' is too. Sometimes we create our own doors to block our sane dreams.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Perfect illustration to go with your thought-provoking poem. The imagery of your 'unhinged dreams' is powerful... 'lurk' is too. Sometimes we create our own doors to block our sane dreams.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Good Morning, Lisa!
So very pleased you enjoyed!
Thank you for your exceptional rating and complimentary review!
diane
Comment from Ulla
Wow, Diane, this 5-7-5 poem is very, very good. Don't ask me why that is, but it just is. The words are so well chosen and they have the most wonderful effect. I love it. Good luck in the contest. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Wow, Diane, this 5-7-5 poem is very, very good. Don't ask me why that is, but it just is. The words are so well chosen and they have the most wonderful effect. I love it. Good luck in the contest. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello dear Ulla!
Glad you enjoyed!
thank you!
diane
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Wow, what a perfect 5--7-5. It has a little bit of mystery and philosophical ending -
Old doors, like old fears,
take their time to disappear ~
Unhinged dreams lurk near.
Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Wow, what a perfect 5--7-5. It has a little bit of mystery and philosophical ending -
Old doors, like old fears,
take their time to disappear ~
Unhinged dreams lurk near.
Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello Iza!
So pleased you enjoyed!
Thank you!
diane
Comment from lyenochka
Brilliantly done, Diane. I like how you connected to the first and last lines with the door metaphor using "unhinged" and there is a fear of doors (entamaphobia).I think you'll do well in the contest!!
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Brilliantly done, Diane. I like how you connected to the first and last lines with the door metaphor using "unhinged" and there is a fear of doors (entamaphobia).I think you'll do well in the contest!!
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello Helen!
Thank you!
So pleased you enjoyed!
diane
Comment from June Sargent
This is so true. Fears and bad memories can hold us back for years - hindering us from following our dreams. It takes a living hand to repair the damage. Some are fortunate enough to meet that handy person.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
This is so true. Fears and bad memories can hold us back for years - hindering us from following our dreams. It takes a living hand to repair the damage. Some are fortunate enough to meet that handy person.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello June!
Thank you!
diane
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Those old fears never really leave us and they remain like scars we wear and sometimes they fade and other times they don't, there's a powerful message behind this metaphoric write Diane, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
Those old fears never really leave us and they remain like scars we wear and sometimes they fade and other times they don't, there's a powerful message behind this metaphoric write Diane, love Dolly x
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Hello Dolly!
So pleased my words resonated with you!
Thank you!
diane