A Poem To My Dead Sister
Writing the pain away41 total reviews
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
So sorry to hear of the loss of your sister at such a young age...you missed a lot, I am sure. This writing is very emotive and brought me near-tears as I read and re-read it for sentimentality's sake. Very beautiful free-verse in devotion to your sister. Good luck in the contest. God bless and hugs, Susanne
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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So sorry to hear of the loss of your sister at such a young age...you missed a lot, I am sure. This writing is very emotive and brought me near-tears as I read and re-read it for sentimentality's sake. Very beautiful free-verse in devotion to your sister. Good luck in the contest. God bless and hugs, Susanne
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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Thank you Susanne.
Comment from William Ross
very nice, as of your note not sure one can write the pain away but it sure does help. I'm sure she's looking out for you. Good luck on this and have a good day
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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very nice, as of your note not sure one can write the pain away but it sure does help. I'm sure she's looking out for you. Good luck on this and have a good day
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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Thank you William.
Comment from barkingdog
It would be so nice if we could change those times in our past that we never had the time to set right.
I can sense the sibling rivalry that never healed. What a shame for it to still be with you so long after your sister's death. But we all have our regrets.
What a lovely rewrite of those time you have here. Maybe, somehow, she'll see the beach in Alantic City, too, and understand what you mean--what you've always meant to say.
Lovely, touching free verse, Amahra.
:) ellen
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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It would be so nice if we could change those times in our past that we never had the time to set right.
I can sense the sibling rivalry that never healed. What a shame for it to still be with you so long after your sister's death. But we all have our regrets.
What a lovely rewrite of those time you have here. Maybe, somehow, she'll see the beach in Alantic City, too, and understand what you mean--what you've always meant to say.
Lovely, touching free verse, Amahra.
:) ellen
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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Thank you Ellen. I'm glad you liked it. Blessings to you.
Comment from nancyrabbrose
Dear Poet: your poem gives a great tribute to you and your sister. I sense that she knows exactly what you wrote in your magnificent poem. My condolence. Truly I feel for you. I am sure your sister is proud of your outstanding writing of which you are doing.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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Dear Poet: your poem gives a great tribute to you and your sister. I sense that she knows exactly what you wrote in your magnificent poem. My condolence. Truly I feel for you. I am sure your sister is proud of your outstanding writing of which you are doing.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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Thank you Nancy.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written free verse poem. Sisters sometimes grow apart while growing up. When the one dies, the other has regrets of not making more effort knowing each other.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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A very well-written free verse poem. Sisters sometimes grow apart while growing up. When the one dies, the other has regrets of not making more effort knowing each other.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much.
Comment from lucky linda
Your poem brought tears to my eyes. There is never enough time to say the things you want to say, especially if you were not close. My sister and I are 70+ . She has cancer and we are still trying to say the things we never could say. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Your poem brought tears to my eyes. There is never enough time to say the things you want to say, especially if you were not close. My sister and I are 70+ . She has cancer and we are still trying to say the things we never could say. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much. I pray a speedy recovery for your sister.
Comment from JLC EmeraldRiver
This is a touching poem that carries many meanings in its lines. The wording is simply beautiful as it takes on the significance of your thoughts, for you have crafted these words elegantly and breathed life into them so that they come alive for the reader. Writing is a truly wonderful thing: it allows us to express ourselves freely in a creative manner. You have told a heartfelt story in this piece, one that speaks to me of struggles and hope and salvation.
The flow of this poem is efficient and sweet, with simple lines mingled with lengthy ones, creating a sense of balance. The message offers relief and perseverance to its readers, and while the story it tells may be a sorrowful one, the poem has a lighthearted feel to it that touches the heart.
Such are my thoughts of this poem you've penned. Good luck, and enjoy your path ahead!
- Jillian
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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This is a touching poem that carries many meanings in its lines. The wording is simply beautiful as it takes on the significance of your thoughts, for you have crafted these words elegantly and breathed life into them so that they come alive for the reader. Writing is a truly wonderful thing: it allows us to express ourselves freely in a creative manner. You have told a heartfelt story in this piece, one that speaks to me of struggles and hope and salvation.
The flow of this poem is efficient and sweet, with simple lines mingled with lengthy ones, creating a sense of balance. The message offers relief and perseverance to its readers, and while the story it tells may be a sorrowful one, the poem has a lighthearted feel to it that touches the heart.
Such are my thoughts of this poem you've penned. Good luck, and enjoy your path ahead!
- Jillian
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much. Your review is certainly touching. I appreciate you taking the time to explain what you liked about this poem. God bless you.
Comment from humpwhistle
I like the 'stigma' instead of astigmatism. Family shorthand.
The silver twirls and pleated face are sharp descriptors.
But I get lost when you bring up the secrets.
I can't find an 'exchange'.
I assume you sister committed suicide after breast cancer.
But your story is unclear.
Again you bring up exchanging secrets.
Again you don't reveal enough.
One man's opinion.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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I like the 'stigma' instead of astigmatism. Family shorthand.
The silver twirls and pleated face are sharp descriptors.
But I get lost when you bring up the secrets.
I can't find an 'exchange'.
I assume you sister committed suicide after breast cancer.
But your story is unclear.
Again you bring up exchanging secrets.
Again you don't reveal enough.
One man's opinion.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much for reviewing. "There was no suicide attempt" is what the line stated.
Comment from Pantygynt
This is the sort of poem that is absolutely made for the free verse treatment. Regularity of meter and rhyme would somehow diminish the thoughts and feeling that can be expressed raw when released from such restrictions.
You tell a sad tale but it is a thing of beauty in itself even though the desease it describes is an ugly thing.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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This is the sort of poem that is absolutely made for the free verse treatment. Regularity of meter and rhyme would somehow diminish the thoughts and feeling that can be expressed raw when released from such restrictions.
You tell a sad tale but it is a thing of beauty in itself even though the desease it describes is an ugly thing.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much. I'm glad you enjoyed the poem.
Comment from patcelaw
Amahra, I am sorry you lost your sister at a young age and there were many things left unsaid. I hope that writing about her helps with the healing. I had a sister who died rather young and I miss her. Blessings for a good weekend. Patricia
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Amahra, I am sorry you lost your sister at a young age and there were many things left unsaid. I hope that writing about her helps with the healing. I had a sister who died rather young and I miss her. Blessings for a good weekend. Patricia
Comment Written 16-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much Patricia. I really appreciate your thoughts and review.