Comment from tfawcus

Excellent

Hell hath no fury like a poet scorned! Mind you, if you always communicated with her in rhyming couplets, I can see how that might eventually have gotten under her skin! I enjoyed this one immensely and thought that your combination of prose to the reader and verse to the erstwhile woman in your life added to the overall humour of the piece.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from Fridayauthor

Excellent

easy rhyming to read and a unique on this contest! It makes you keep wondering if the door will remain open, figuratively or otherwise.

I liked the choice of words in this piece, as well as the constant tone of his voice,

Very good entry!

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from risktaker

Exceptional

I love the way you processed this transition from insane love to acceptance that this love is not worth investing in because you are not valued for who YOU are. I relate to the vivid scenes, I relate to the imagery, I relate to the final decisions made. I feel like i am watching a movie. Great job!!!

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

Thank you for your comments and support.

reply by risktaker on 27-Apr-2015

ok

Comment from Bill Schott

Excellent

I liked this poem all the way through and especially the final line that raises the banner high for anyone who has ever been burned. Nice.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from artemis53

Excellent

"No, she didn't lock her door, but, I sure did. " That seems to be a recurring theme. I like how the character contained his composure so quickly aware that the relationship flaws would appear over and over again.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from Tatarka2

Excellent

This is such a unique take on this prompt; using poetry to imply a horrific outcome. The contrast between the angst of the jilted lover, the sweetness (?) of the poetry, and the implied outcome make this such a powerful piece.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from MelB

Excellent

I enjoyed this writing prompt. I like the phrase you made a memory out of me. This guy has learned his lesson and he is not letting her back in to hurt him all over again. I like the ending, she didn't lock her door, but he sure did. Kudos to him!

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from Jeanie Mercer

Excellent

This has a clever ending for the story of this disappointed and disappointing love. There's more than one way to lock a door, either a literal door or the door to one's heart. Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

This has a sort of country and western feel to it though it obviously isn't a song. And the moral of the story is ...It never pays to try to put the clock back - it doesn't go round that way. Good old tale this.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

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Comment from Free_Roxanne

Good

This was great. Read my short story when you have a chance: "Tony Award". Boy, do I know where you are coming from. Love hurts, doesn't it? The problem is that we think its over and we're okay, but it's never over. Keep on writing. Good work.
Free_Roxanne

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 Comment Written 26-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015

You called it great and only gave it 4 Stars? Thanks for your comments and support.

reply by Free_Roxanne on 26-Apr-2015

Yes, but after I sent the four stars thru, I wanted to give it five. Thanks for reminding me. I will try to do it over here, Free_Roxanne