All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "Our Game"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
101 total reviews
Comment from guinea
Very good. Queen takes all. Your poem is excellent. Shows deep thought. The imagery is great. Your words flow smoothly and with sincerity.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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Very good. Queen takes all. Your poem is excellent. Shows deep thought. The imagery is great. Your words flow smoothly and with sincerity.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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thx so much guinea! :)Sharyn
Comment from c_lucas
In the bedroom, the woman rules. Mark Twain said it best. "Man is the candlestic and woman the holder. The woman can outlast the man."
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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In the bedroom, the woman rules. Mark Twain said it best. "Man is the candlestic and woman the holder. The woman can outlast the man."
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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you better believe it, Charlie, right? :)
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Woman are the rulers in the bedroom.
Comment from LaDonnaCole
BOOM!
Yeah, that was awesome! Foreboding! Utterly feminine! The picture was a perfect start to this experience.
complete
dank
black
lack of them,
attacking, tarred
lip-smacking, scarred
wormy
ball
of them
compressed and writhing
in my
gut
ready to cut their way out
to freedom
YIKES! I would love to share this with a friend of mine. She would so relate!
Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
 |
BOOM!
Yeah, that was awesome! Foreboding! Utterly feminine! The picture was a perfect start to this experience.
complete
dank
black
lack of them,
attacking, tarred
lip-smacking, scarred
wormy
ball
of them
compressed and writhing
in my
gut
ready to cut their way out
to freedom
YIKES! I would love to share this with a friend of mine. She would so relate!
Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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BOOM! love it that you love it LD! Please feel free to share it - and bless you for that lovely six! I see you've just joined FS - welcome! :)Sharyn
Comment from Cogitator
About thirty years ago, I realized that I was the only one who could generate emotion within myself. I also realized that it was my own ignorance that caused that to happen. I learned. Good job! John...
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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About thirty years ago, I realized that I was the only one who could generate emotion within myself. I also realized that it was my own ignorance that caused that to happen. I learned. Good job! John...
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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yes indeed, John - we wise up after a while, hmm? :)Sharyn
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
strangling, at the end
of your strings
queen takes all
kings fall
Love those phrases! This is a daringly different direction to go, and I love it! Well done in your usual wonderful style!
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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strangling, at the end
of your strings
queen takes all
kings fall
Love those phrases! This is a daringly different direction to go, and I love it! Well done in your usual wonderful style!
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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thx so much Phyllis - we like to shoot of at tangents occasionally ... :)S
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Sharyn,
This is a great poem for the feelings contest. I am happy to know your hubby is okay! This piece is delicious in its darkness which is right up my alley. I haven't written a dark poem lately but I know I will as they come pretty easy to me. You have good alliteration through out, the flow is fluid, the words dark and compelling. Well done and good luck in the contest....blessings, chey
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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Hi Sharyn,
This is a great poem for the feelings contest. I am happy to know your hubby is okay! This piece is delicious in its darkness which is right up my alley. I haven't written a dark poem lately but I know I will as they come pretty easy to me. You have good alliteration through out, the flow is fluid, the words dark and compelling. Well done and good luck in the contest....blessings, chey
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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thx so much, Chey! :)Sharyn
Comment from beccabootie123
wow deep and preverse. well done the picture was awesome and the color palate enriches the piece. well done with a very clear message. totally enjoyable
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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wow deep and preverse. well done the picture was awesome and the color palate enriches the piece. well done with a very clear message. totally enjoyable
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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thx so much, Becca! :)Sharyn
Comment from write hand blue
Humm yes, you are prepared for something out of the ordinary when you see that picture. Pictures of a nightmare.
I like this, such powerful words full of emotion. Startling imagery so creative and written to a standard that is inspiring. Good work.... Mel.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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Humm yes, you are prepared for something out of the ordinary when you see that picture. Pictures of a nightmare.
I like this, such powerful words full of emotion. Startling imagery so creative and written to a standard that is inspiring. Good work.... Mel.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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Bless you, Mel - thx so much! :)Sharyn
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My Pleasure... Mel.
Comment from jandeck
One of the cooliist things I've read! I loved everything about this poem, the style of writing, the subject, etc. I especially loved the comparison to the chess game and the last four lines were outstanding. Anyone in a relationship can relate to these feelings once in a while. Great job!
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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One of the cooliist things I've read! I loved everything about this poem, the style of writing, the subject, etc. I especially loved the comparison to the chess game and the last four lines were outstanding. Anyone in a relationship can relate to these feelings once in a while. Great job!
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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Bless you for your lovely six Jan!!! so much appreciated - so glad you "got" this write.
Best wishes
Sharyn
Comment from Curt Mongold
The only time I get scared is when the woman I'm with gets really quiet. That usually means that there is a big explosion in the making, and it is time to take cover!
Great write,
Curt
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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The only time I get scared is when the woman I'm with gets really quiet. That usually means that there is a big explosion in the making, and it is time to take cover!
Great write,
Curt
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2013
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Smart lad! :)