The Return
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Return Chapter 5"Erotic Turmoil
35 total reviews
Comment from John Ciarmello
Oh, dear Lord! I am such a fan of yours Sandra! I have to, have to, have to, go back and read the past chapters of this story. I got a good feeling for the characters in this chapter. Your dialogue is seamless. How does Bessie know all the incidentals? I DO think Margot is part of this in some way? I'm asking questions like you're going to write me a personal chapter... Will you? Lol.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Oh, dear Lord! I am such a fan of yours Sandra! I have to, have to, have to, go back and read the past chapters of this story. I got a good feeling for the characters in this chapter. Your dialogue is seamless. How does Bessie know all the incidentals? I DO think Margot is part of this in some way? I'm asking questions like you're going to write me a personal chapter... Will you? Lol.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Aww, bless your hear, John. Thank you so much for this lovely review, you've quite made me blush. How does Bessie know? Hmm, you'll have to come back to find out! lol. Thank you for that golden star, my friend, that is so very kind of you. Sending you a warm hug. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Shirley McLain
This is a compelling, mysterious story to read. You can feel the tension in the story, and I certainly want more to read. You did a great job. Have a wonderful Sunday. Shirley
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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This is a compelling, mysterious story to read. You can feel the tension in the story, and I certainly want more to read. You did a great job. Have a wonderful Sunday. Shirley
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Thank you so much, dear Shirley, for another lovely review and the golden star you've given me. You are a lovely lady, and I appreciate you so much. Sending a warm hug, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Begin Again
Oh you wrote this ghostly post with chills sent directly to my spine...It was smooth as if I was sitting at the table with them. What a thrill! but poor Margot has so much unfinished business on her mind and to wonder what might happen to her and what's expected. I am sure Bessie was there, but how much more can or is she willing to share. You've truly got this one down to a tee, my friend. I love it!
Now alas I must go take care of Garth...before something drastic happens. LOL Thanks for starting my morning off so marvelously. This one will be a definite winner in the best seller class. Bravo!
Sending smiles, hugs and lots of love, Carol
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Oh you wrote this ghostly post with chills sent directly to my spine...It was smooth as if I was sitting at the table with them. What a thrill! but poor Margot has so much unfinished business on her mind and to wonder what might happen to her and what's expected. I am sure Bessie was there, but how much more can or is she willing to share. You've truly got this one down to a tee, my friend. I love it!
Now alas I must go take care of Garth...before something drastic happens. LOL Thanks for starting my morning off so marvelously. This one will be a definite winner in the best seller class. Bravo!
Sending smiles, hugs and lots of love, Carol
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Margot has no idea yet, what is in store for her! Lol. Thank you so much, dear Carol, for that shiny sixer, and this fabulous review. Thank you for those encouraging words, too. Sometimes, I lay in bed and wonder if it is any good, I'm a bit like you in a sense. Although why you doubt yourself, I don't know. You've put a smile on my face, my dear friend. Lots of love and hugs back. Sandra xxx
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Hopefully you will fall in love with the chapter I just posted. I am sweating that it comes across right.... Smiles, hugs and lots of love...Carol
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Sandra,
Good continuation as we get some of the story but have more questions raised.
I made some notes as I went through - some for clarity.
She picked up her cup and drank the last mouthfuls, then held it out.- I really just want to say 'she drained her cup'... lol
Twas may need a ' at the beginning.
'sposed to be read.- I kinds of would be inclined to have this read s'posed.
Perhaps she's in cahoots with him.- cahoots made me pause. Margot is only around 29, not sure if this would be the right word. not sure.
It's been written that she had an accident. Her saddle slipped and Mistress Meg fell off'n broke her neck. Of course, that's the story everyone was told. They hushed it up. It weren't surprising; money can talk a lot louder'n the truth,- but if the money was gone & the Lady & Meg were left destitute as previously stated, would/could this have happened?
Why would Lord Crawley have Meg murdered all those years later? He'd stopped the marriage from taking place, so she couldn't have brought shame to the family.- this shouldn't be Lord Crawley, he was already dead by that point years earlier. Should it be Mile's father? {or have I just terribly confused?}
for mistress Meg's birthday, - Mistress should be capitalised here as it is elsewhere.
All the best
G
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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Hi Sandra,
Good continuation as we get some of the story but have more questions raised.
I made some notes as I went through - some for clarity.
She picked up her cup and drank the last mouthfuls, then held it out.- I really just want to say 'she drained her cup'... lol
Twas may need a ' at the beginning.
'sposed to be read.- I kinds of would be inclined to have this read s'posed.
Perhaps she's in cahoots with him.- cahoots made me pause. Margot is only around 29, not sure if this would be the right word. not sure.
It's been written that she had an accident. Her saddle slipped and Mistress Meg fell off'n broke her neck. Of course, that's the story everyone was told. They hushed it up. It weren't surprising; money can talk a lot louder'n the truth,- but if the money was gone & the Lady & Meg were left destitute as previously stated, would/could this have happened?
Why would Lord Crawley have Meg murdered all those years later? He'd stopped the marriage from taking place, so she couldn't have brought shame to the family.- this shouldn't be Lord Crawley, he was already dead by that point years earlier. Should it be Mile's father? {or have I just terribly confused?}
for mistress Meg's birthday, - Mistress should be capitalised here as it is elsewhere.
All the best
G
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Hi, Gareth. Thanks so much for catching these terrible blunders. I've corrected them now. The worst one was giving Miles's father Lord Crawley's name. I've got to go and put the other lords name in, so as not to get confused. Miles had bought Meg the house Margot is living in, and paid all her bills. (Bessie told that to Margot.) He would have given her a horse and carriage as well, but I will put that in somewhere. I'm glad you were the first to review!! Thanks so much for this. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
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We're not told that Miles bought the house for them until after all the other stuff is relayed, so that's why it's a bit confusing as you read through that first
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Ah, I'll sort that now! The Miles' father is Lord Brandon! I've just named him, lol! xx
Comment from Ulla
Hi Sandra, what an enchanting story, and I agree something is far from right. I now fear for Margot and what might lie in store for her. So six weeks to go until what? It blows my mind.
It's so well written, and now I have to wait a full week before I'll know a little more.
If there is anything to correct, I certainly didn't come across it. A big hug, Ulla. xxx
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Hi Sandra, what an enchanting story, and I agree something is far from right. I now fear for Margot and what might lie in store for her. So six weeks to go until what? It blows my mind.
It's so well written, and now I have to wait a full week before I'll know a little more.
If there is anything to correct, I certainly didn't come across it. A big hug, Ulla. xxx
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Thank you so much, Ulla, what a lovely review this is. I'm really pleased you enjoyed it. I had finished this part yesterday afternoon, then woke up at three oclock this morning realising I'd made one heck of a blunder and had to get up and put it right. So, as you can imagine, I was knackered but the time I'd finished! Lol. You are my first review and I was so very pleased with what you wrote. Thank you, my friend, and a big hug for that golden star!! Love and hugs, Sandra xxx
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Oh, I know it very well. I have been struggling with the part I'm about to release. I had a blunder, as well which I saw late last night. I corrected it, and yet I had to rewrite some more today.
I can well imagine how tired you must be. xxx
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Isn't it awful when our books take over our sleep? I'm still going, I asked Graham to pour me a G&T to keep me going!! Lol xxx
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Hehehe, good on you! That's the spirit. xxx