A Slice of Apple Pie
Dialogue Only39 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written dialogue between a daughter and mother that become a great time together with discussion of baking apple pie while mother is still in the past and forget each moment tha passed.
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A very well-written dialogue between a daughter and mother that become a great time together with discussion of baking apple pie while mother is still in the past and forget each moment tha passed.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Some people cook the cheese into the crust. This is sad because you see how confused the mom is. Maybe with dementia or Alzheimer so it's good the child was able to come visit and lunch.
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Some people cook the cheese into the crust. This is sad because you see how confused the mom is. Maybe with dementia or Alzheimer so it's good the child was able to come visit and lunch.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
Comment from Mistydawn
What a sad story, but so relatable. As a nurse, I used to see families struggle through situations like this all the time. See the heartbreak, the frustrations on their face. It's very well-written, interesting, easy to follow, get the feel of things despite the lack of description. Great job, good luck with your contest.
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What a sad story, but so relatable. As a nurse, I used to see families struggle through situations like this all the time. See the heartbreak, the frustrations on their face. It's very well-written, interesting, easy to follow, get the feel of things despite the lack of description. Great job, good luck with your contest.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
Comment from Ulla
Awe Diane, this is such a wonderful dialogue only story. And so bittersweet as well. The mother is obviously suffering from dementia. She's not even aware that her husband has died, and that she now lives in a home. It's a wonderful story. Good luck in the contest. All the best. Ulla:)))
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Awe Diane, this is such a wonderful dialogue only story. And so bittersweet as well. The mother is obviously suffering from dementia. She's not even aware that her husband has died, and that she now lives in a home. It's a wonderful story. Good luck in the contest. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Aaaaww, Diane -- this is wonderful!! And sad!! And just everything all wrapped up into one big 'pull on the heartstrings'! :) ;) You've done a great job painting the scene while also giving a clear and loving picture of you and your mom...and your mom's condition and your relationship with her...we even get a warm peak into the kind of person your mom is...and just how much she loved your dad. :) ;) Thank you so very much for taking the time with this so that we would all have a beautiful family portrait to enjoy! :) :) Yvette :)
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2018
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Aaaaww, Diane -- this is wonderful!! And sad!! And just everything all wrapped up into one big 'pull on the heartstrings'! :) ;) You've done a great job painting the scene while also giving a clear and loving picture of you and your mom...and your mom's condition and your relationship with her...we even get a warm peak into the kind of person your mom is...and just how much she loved your dad. :) ;) Thank you so very much for taking the time with this so that we would all have a beautiful family portrait to enjoy! :) :) Yvette :)
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2018
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Good Morning, Yvette,
Sad, indeed...
Thank you for your excellent rating and thoughtful review.
A decade of suffering. At the end, a three-person assist in a nursing home three hours away from where I live. There were a few moments of clarity, but most of all, there was just pain, anger, sadness, and hopelessness. I felt those emotions as well...
Thank you again, friend!
diane
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello Diane, What a moving piece of writing for the contest. In your first few words I knew where this story was going. A mother striving to keep her independence and dignity against all the odds. The patience of the daughter! It really does depict situations that are taking place at this moment. This mother is lucky - the daughter's devotion is evident throughout the writing. I was moved with your opening words. The mother anxious about having her purse - 'Where's my purse? Do you have my purse?' You really have captured the sad situation some people face when they grow old and the difficult situation of the loving person who has to cope with it. You have written a lovely Dialogue piece and I wish you well in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2018
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Hello Diane, What a moving piece of writing for the contest. In your first few words I knew where this story was going. A mother striving to keep her independence and dignity against all the odds. The patience of the daughter! It really does depict situations that are taking place at this moment. This mother is lucky - the daughter's devotion is evident throughout the writing. I was moved with your opening words. The mother anxious about having her purse - 'Where's my purse? Do you have my purse?' You really have captured the sad situation some people face when they grow old and the difficult situation of the loving person who has to cope with it. You have written a lovely Dialogue piece and I wish you well in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2018
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Hello Dorothy,
I am so pleased that my words resonated with you.
Thank you for your excellent rating and thoughtful review.
My mother suffered from dementia and Parkinson's disease for over a decade. This conversation took place at the nursing home where she lived for over five years. So heartbreaking. She was emotionally, physically, and mentally broken. She suffered greatly and was a three-person assist. I miss her every day...
Thank you again, Dorothy...
diane
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Hello Diane, I should have looked at the very top of your post and I would have seen it was biographical. I suspected it was though. To see your mother suffer for so long must have been awful. My mother died suddenly without warning at only 63 yrs. I was at the time in the classroom marking papers when Ken walked in and said he had bad news. My first thought was one of the children had been in an accident. But he would have been with them. So many thoughts went through my mind in so short a time, till he said "You mother is dead". Stupidly I told him she could not be - I'd spoken to her the night before. Like you I think of my mam every days and she has been dead for so long. People said, no doubt to comfort me, that at least she died quickly without suffering. I'll never know that and of course I did not agree. She was too young. Life can be so sad - Dorothy x
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Thank you, Dorothy.
My mom suffered so much...
No words can adequately describe the heartbreak...
diane
Comment from Mastery
Hi, Diane. Very well done in staying with dialogue only. Not only did you stay with those guidelines, but you made it a worthwhile, interesting story for your readers. Bless you, and Good Luck in the contest. Best wishes for success. Bob
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Hi, Diane. Very well done in staying with dialogue only. Not only did you stay with those guidelines, but you made it a worthwhile, interesting story for your readers. Bless you, and Good Luck in the contest. Best wishes for success. Bob
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That is a sad story. I was fortunate that neither of my parents suffered dementia, it would have broken my heart. I loved the concept, the apple pie, my mother taught me to make pastry, she was a great pastry chef. Great dialect only contest entry. Well done, and good luck. :)) Sandra xx
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That is a sad story. I was fortunate that neither of my parents suffered dementia, it would have broken my heart. I loved the concept, the apple pie, my mother taught me to make pastry, she was a great pastry chef. Great dialect only contest entry. Well done, and good luck. :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
I liked this piece. it's obvious what's going on through the conversation but not 'smashed over the head with a hammer' blatant.
Personally I don't like the final line, and in this context I think it wouldn't be in the slightest bit appropriate to say it. but that's probably just me.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Hi there,
I liked this piece. it's obvious what's going on through the conversation but not 'smashed over the head with a hammer' blatant.
Personally I don't like the final line, and in this context I think it wouldn't be in the slightest bit appropriate to say it. but that's probably just me.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Thank you, Gareth for the excellent rating and complimentary review.
Seven years. My mom was in a combined assisted living/nursing care situation for seven years following the death of my father. For at least the last four/five years, she was what was termed a "three-person assist" when it came to getting her in and out of her bed. To witness this once creative and vibrant woman deteriorate physically, emotionally, and mentally was beyond heartbreaking. At the end of this particular visit, I was exhausted physically, emotionally, and mentally That was the reality...My final words were partly exhaustion, partly selfishness, partly a prayer that God make her suffering stop and take her home as well...
diane
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is a sad write Diane, so realistic and caring too and Alzheimer's is what i fear most in life, by writing I am hoping it will never haunt me, I loved your dialogue and the last line is haunting, love Dolly x
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This is a sad write Diane, so realistic and caring too and Alzheimer's is what i fear most in life, by writing I am hoping it will never haunt me, I loved your dialogue and the last line is haunting, love Dolly x
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018