Reviews from

Perennials of War

Viewing comments for Chapter 61 "Chapter Neunzehn part eins"
Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan

27 total reviews 
Comment from apky
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted


Your writing has improved remarkably, Barbara. This was a joy to read, the dialogue rang true and flowed. The tension in the relationship between Shana and Anderson is beginning to ease up and he is opening up to her.

The length was no trouble at all, in fact it provided the right insight into the story.

Excellent.

Why(,) because I'm a billionaire?

"No PHD?(PhD?)"

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    Thank you for the generous review. I have made the corrections.
Comment from judiverse
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh, this does deserve a 6. A lot of emotion coming out in this. Anderson tells a lot about his family history. He's very solicitous of Shana, wants to wait on her. She is not used to that. Hey, who couldn't get used to a guy like Anderson, so I bet she'll get used to the pampering. Anderson tries to be prepared in the face of danger, hence the nice and the gun. Shana questions that, but she hasn't been in a dangerous situation herself--until now. Shana's crying out during the night suggests that she's still very troubled about all the threats to her and her family. judi

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    She is. I am working on a scene that comes up in a few months that Shana actually rescues Anderson. I'm wondering how he'll handle that. LOL. Thank you for the generous review.
reply by judiverse on 21-Jan-2018
    You're welcome. Good for Shana! judi
Comment from Gert sherwood
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Barb
Great chapter a couple of things that you wrote got my attention of Anderson telling Shana about his great-grand-pappy, Klaus.
and your scene during the middle of the night, Anderson woke to shrill, piercing cries. He jumped up and ran to Shana's room and found
her crying
Leave me curious what made her scream
Gert

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    I'm wondering too. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from c_lucas
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Nothing like a screaming woman to bring out the machoism in a man. I thought you overdid dinner. Anderson should have at least let her set the table and helped clean up. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    Anderson is a real gentleman and didn't want his guest to have to do anything. LOL Thank you for the kind review. Oh yea, Shana will get to clean up tomorrow night.
reply by c_lucas on 22-Jan-2018
    You're welcome, Barbara. Charlie
reply by c_lucas on 23-Jan-2018
    You're welcome, Barbara. Charlie
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Thanks for the pleasure of reading another of your fine chapters. I haven't missed so much that I couldn't figure out most of it on my own, and I'm sure little hints will bring the rest back along the way. Great job. :-)

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    I hope so. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sankey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another good read. Starting to get more personal which is nice.
Now for some spags. Would (you)like to see it?"

"To[o] be honest, I don't like crowds."

"You'd better [to] leave."

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    The last correction I rewrote the sentence as I posted and left 'to' in. How silly of me?? Thank you for the catches.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Anderson has an opportunity to reveal to Shana his culinary skills and she gets to find out some family history. How great, great.....grandfather came from Germany, and one found oil, his couple of degrees and co. He's wakened to hear Shana screaming... Why? Well done Barbara, blesings, Roy
Typo : "Would you like (to) see it?" 2: "You're used to be(ing) waited on."3 He set a salad in (from) of Shana," front?

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2018
    WOW!!! did I ever mess up. LOL Thank you for the catches. I wait on pins and needles for the first couple of reviews to see how many stupid mistakes I made. Thank you again.
reply by royowen on 21-Jan-2018
    Not stupid Barbara, we all do it, I'm glad to have your back.