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Viewing comments for Chapter 34 "End of Winter"
Free verse poems

32 total reviews 
Comment from Pantygynt
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This is lovely and I am honoured. However there is one serious misuse of language which any Welsh speaker will pick up in a trice. Cymraeg is a noun = the Welsh language. English has no exact equivalent and so we use the adjective Welsh. This doubles as a noun when I say "do you speak Welsh?" And an adjective when describing other things that come from Wales. Instead, for anything that in English would use the adjective Welsh, in the Cymraeg would be described as "of Wales = y Cymru" (pronounced "uh kumree").

I hope that is clear it is an unusual concept for us to grasp. Perhaps "currant nutmeg cakes" or "sweet Welsh nutmeg cakes" would suffice and maintain the meter but definitely not Cymraeg.

Thought I'd better alert you to this ASAP to avoid any possible embarrassment.

It is still a lovely piece and a Pantygynt too. I am not only honoured but charmed.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jan-2017
    Arghh I answered this on my phone, but it seems not to have gone through. So "y cymru" is the correct wording, I think I've made this mistake before. I have to think about how to fix it, but fortunately I'm guessing no one here will recognize the problem besides yourself...so far I'm right. But I will fix it,
    Carol
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
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Lovely poem. Great rhyming pattern. I wish we were a lot closer to the end of winter, since that means more daylight! I hate the early darkness. It affects a lot of us. Cold? I love the cold. Can't have it both ways, darn it. :)

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jan-2017
    I am always happy what's the solstice is past, and the days increase in daylight again. I do actually enjoy snow, although I don't have to live with it where we are now :))
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
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A cinquain break. A lovely written poem:

He's got a book to read and write,
new rhymes he must create;
old verse to coax, and reignite,
as rain falls thick, in spate.

the snow will melt by end of day
sweet rivulets will form and play
as spring comes, in her lazy way,

such beauty's worth the wait!

I am more than ready for spring. We just had an ice storm which keeps me trapped in the house for fear I'll go flying off my ramp and into the neighbors front yard~Debbie

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Oh, the ice storms are awful! I'd stay inside too. We have a big rainstorm today, my doggies need a walk but I'm not so sure about it...

    Thanks for the nice review,
    Carol
Comment from misscookie
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I love the artwork you choose to go with your poem
it is a perfect match.
I could smell the crisp fresh air as the snow slowly melts away and green grass appears.
Thank you for sharing.
Cookie

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Thank you, that vision of the crisp air as the snow melts is a nice one!

    Carol
reply by misscookie on 20-Jan-2017
    You're very welcome and, thank you.
    Have a nice week end.
    Cookie
Comment from brenda bickers
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Hi Carol,
as much as I have enjoyed your cinquains this type of poetry suits your style perfectly. I have missed your perfectly described story like poems with there many simile and metaphors. This one was just beautiful. sadly I do no have any sixes left but please note that this is definitely worthy of one. I loved it.
Brenda:))x

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Thank you so much, I like this style better myself too - it is one of my favorite poetic forms. Glad you enjoyed it and thanks for the virtual six!
    Carol
Comment from royowen
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This is more the Carol I know, great wordsmithing, deftly designed and woven in smooth cadence and meter, with an elegant language, sort of Chorus and verse, with single line exclamation, excellent piece of Celtic origin well done,blessings, Roy

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Yes, this is what everyone is saying. Thanks so much, Roy,
    Carol
reply by royowen on 20-Jan-2017
    Well done
Comment from sandy montgomery
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I love the story you told. What a wonderful picture of warm coziness. This oozed charm. I thought your rhymes were natural and unforced. This had a great rhythm. Very well written. Thank you for sharing your work.

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Thank you, I really had fun writing this one. I love the flow of the Pantygynt form :))
    Carol
Comment from DonandVicki
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A very well composed poem, I am sure that there are many who are more than ready for the spring. I get the feeling and imagery of the hopefulness of the coming Springtime.

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Oh yes, I know many people who are very much done with the rain and snow - but it keeps coming! In fact, it's raining here in So Cal this morning...

    Carol
reply by DonandVicki on 20-Jan-2017
    I had no idea that you are in So. Cal. We are in Ramona, 40 miles No. East of San Diego, enjoying the same rain. Don and Vicki
Comment from Mark Valentine
Exceptional
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Wordsworthian! Love the alternating iambic tetrameter and trimeter. It rolls like a river. There's a nice arc too - starting peacefully as night falls, giving way to the unseen dramas of the night, and subsiding back to peace in the morning.

A lot of care went into crafting this one. Must have taken a while but " such beauty is worth the wait"

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2017
    Thanks, Mark, it did take a little while, but once I was really in the mood for it, it developed quickly. I like what you said about the arc - you are right about that. I like it! I sometimes don't see these things in my own work, lol.

    Carol
Comment from zanya
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This poem captures the panoramic view of winter in all its chill yet wonderful mystique- so many striking vignettes and embellished with alliteration- the poet's arrival heightens the moment 'old verse to coax and reignite

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2017


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2017
    Thank you so much, I really appreciate this - don't you just love coaxing rhymes? Especially when inside by the fire on a stormy, cold day :))

    Carol