2015 Haiku
Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "haiku suite (on a warm day)"A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015
55 total reviews
Comment from Nosha17
Three vivid images of water scenes. Good descriptions and all with a good cryptic message. Well chosen words to convey your thoughts. Good luck in the contest. Faye
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Three vivid images of water scenes. Good descriptions and all with a good cryptic message. Well chosen words to convey your thoughts. Good luck in the contest. Faye
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words :)
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is an excellent haiku suite. In all three, lines l and 2 interconnect perfectly. Your third lines are very good satori. Especially the third. Very clever. Good luck in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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This is an excellent haiku suite. In all three, lines l and 2 interconnect perfectly. Your third lines are very good satori. Especially the third. Very clever. Good luck in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words :)
Comment from mermaids
Love your last verse, it is so true to life. I imagine many waterfalls do drown out mating calls. Your haiku form and vivid descriptions of nature create a clear picture where one feels she is out in nature.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Love your last verse, it is so true to life. I imagine many waterfalls do drown out mating calls. Your haiku form and vivid descriptions of nature create a clear picture where one feels she is out in nature.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words :)
Comment from jaded831
An excellent piece of work. True to form, a theme that takes the reader to a place of serenity. No pun intended, your poem flows nicely. It could uses a picture reflecting the serenity of your poem.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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An excellent piece of work. True to form, a theme that takes the reader to a place of serenity. No pun intended, your poem flows nicely. It could uses a picture reflecting the serenity of your poem.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words :) I would love to add a picture but it is against the contest rules.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
waterfall drowns
bird of paradise mating call
birth control
a clever use of words in this trio of haikus - I thought this one was particularly clever.
Good luck with the contest, my friend.
Margaret
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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waterfall drowns
bird of paradise mating call
birth control
a clever use of words in this trio of haikus - I thought this one was particularly clever.
Good luck with the contest, my friend.
Margaret
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words :)
Comment from GregoryCody
These are Amazing! So beautiful. Your flow is nice even though it's not needed, truly strong. Your descriptions are vivid, and creative. Is the kigo bird of paradise
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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These are Amazing! So beautiful. Your flow is nice even though it's not needed, truly strong. Your descriptions are vivid, and creative. Is the kigo bird of paradise
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you Gregory, coming from you this review means a lot to me.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this haiku suite. I like the third one the best. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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this is an excellent write, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this haiku suite. I like the third one the best. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you Jax, I really appreciate your kind words and excellent review. :)
Comment from Janet Foor
Wow! So many rules but I think your met all the requirements of this contest beautifully. A lovely haiku suite on the subject of water. Well done and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Wow! So many rules but I think your met all the requirements of this contest beautifully. A lovely haiku suite on the subject of water. Well done and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words. :)
Comment from mfowler
on a warm day
cool brook runs through quiet woods
zen stream of thought
(This has a nice mystical feel to it. The setting is perfect. The stream via its natural flow and quiet movement invite contemplation, the zen stream of thought; punny and apt)
April rain fills
creek under willow trees
blessing in disguise
(Yes, the rain will be needed. The willows suck the water from the creeks. It's good to fill the creek before the dry of summer.)
waterfall deafened
bird of paradise mating call
birth control
(I like this one. The poor bird of paradise is drowned out and can't find his feathered friend to canoodle. Of course, birth control.)
An excellent collection of divergent imagery. Good entry. Best of luck.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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on a warm day
cool brook runs through quiet woods
zen stream of thought
(This has a nice mystical feel to it. The setting is perfect. The stream via its natural flow and quiet movement invite contemplation, the zen stream of thought; punny and apt)
April rain fills
creek under willow trees
blessing in disguise
(Yes, the rain will be needed. The willows suck the water from the creeks. It's good to fill the creek before the dry of summer.)
waterfall deafened
bird of paradise mating call
birth control
(I like this one. The poor bird of paradise is drowned out and can't find his feathered friend to canoodle. Of course, birth control.)
An excellent collection of divergent imagery. Good entry. Best of luck.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words. :)
Comment from dragonpoet
This shows different sides of the same nature scene. I like the metaphor of the waterfall being birth control because it stops the mate from hearing the mating call so no mating can occur.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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This shows different sides of the same nature scene. I like the metaphor of the waterfall being birth control because it stops the mate from hearing the mating call so no mating can occur.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 23-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2015
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Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words. :)
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You're very welcome on all accounts.
dragonpoet