All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Puzzling Pieces"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
84 total reviews
Comment from vkmack
This is just magical. You had me with this is my beginning (very David Copperfield), but the words began to flow and tilt and ebb and bob and do all sorts of acrobatics, and I was in over my head very quickly. The last few lines of stanza one are especially meaningful and lovely, and they flow right into stanza two. This seems especially sharp and fresh and almost like a short story. And those words and descriptions! Your portrayal of your mother--and your connection to and with her--is indicative of every woman's struggle, and you personify it here so well. Just amazing work.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2013
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This is just magical. You had me with this is my beginning (very David Copperfield), but the words began to flow and tilt and ebb and bob and do all sorts of acrobatics, and I was in over my head very quickly. The last few lines of stanza one are especially meaningful and lovely, and they flow right into stanza two. This seems especially sharp and fresh and almost like a short story. And those words and descriptions! Your portrayal of your mother--and your connection to and with her--is indicative of every woman's struggle, and you personify it here so well. Just amazing work.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2013
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Thank you for your wonderful words vk - I'm never sure how my stuff will go over - always a "crap shoot" so to speak - so I'm always so relieved when someone "gets" what I'm trying to encapsulate. Bless you, big-time, for the lovely six on this one! :)Sharyn
Comment from Sasha
This is absolutely superb. What a marvelously written journey you allowed us to share. I love the entire poem but was deeply moved by 'The Beginning'. I especially like 'At least this cage is still clothed in sunshine' giving us a sparkle of hope. We all carry some of our mother in us, it is only natural. Only comment is I wouldn't title the last one as 'This is my End' simply because your life is still ongoing and the real end may be so very different.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2013
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This is absolutely superb. What a marvelously written journey you allowed us to share. I love the entire poem but was deeply moved by 'The Beginning'. I especially like 'At least this cage is still clothed in sunshine' giving us a sparkle of hope. We all carry some of our mother in us, it is only natural. Only comment is I wouldn't title the last one as 'This is my End' simply because your life is still ongoing and the real end may be so very different.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2013
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it may indeed ... perhaps "the beginning of the my end ... and the end of the beginning ..." All a mystery, hmm? So glad you enjoyed this one my dear! :)Sharyn
Comment from steevie
spiraling upward in
life experience, occasionally meeting my old self on the way,
still puzzled.
Sharyn, this was the best passage in the write for me. LOL
Its funny how we either spiral upwards or downwards at times and yet, we can see ourselves occasionally going either direction.
This piece was jammed packed with all your life in a 'nutshell'.
Great job, my friend
smiles
steve
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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spiraling upward in
life experience, occasionally meeting my old self on the way,
still puzzled.
Sharyn, this was the best passage in the write for me. LOL
Its funny how we either spiral upwards or downwards at times and yet, we can see ourselves occasionally going either direction.
This piece was jammed packed with all your life in a 'nutshell'.
Great job, my friend
smiles
steve
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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It was indeed, my friend! Thank you so much - :)Sharyn
:o)
Comment from Katniss Everdeen
This poem had extraordinary imagery. I can almost smell the grass and berries, taste the coffee, hear the laughter, feel the breath. Amazing job.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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This poem had extraordinary imagery. I can almost smell the grass and berries, taste the coffee, hear the laughter, feel the breath. Amazing job.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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And you're only twelve? Wow, Katniss - I'm impressed by your depth of reading & reviewing. I look forward to seeing your work! Bless you for your magic six for my piece (did I mention you must have good taste? ::::: JK)
Best wishes & many thanks
Sharyn
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Thank you for your gracious compliments.
Comment from Selina Stambi
puffed pink sunset ..... vintage visionary!
Again ..... there has to be more than a smidgeon of autobiography in this fabulous write.
I loved the underlying perplexed irony that peeps through.
The first - the childhood stanza - was my fave! :)
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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puffed pink sunset ..... vintage visionary!
Again ..... there has to be more than a smidgeon of autobiography in this fabulous write.
I loved the underlying perplexed irony that peeps through.
The first - the childhood stanza - was my fave! :)
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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"vintage visionary" ... I like that! of course, always more than a smidgeon of autobiography ... blessings for sharing my "life" with me my dear!
:) Sharyn
Comment from guinea
Wonderful work here to read. The imagery is great. The flow of words is indeed smooth. Shows deep thinking and compassion. Great job.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Wonderful work here to read. The imagery is great. The flow of words is indeed smooth. Shows deep thinking and compassion. Great job.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Bless you for your lovely six on this one guinea! I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
Many, many thanks and MUCH appreciation, as always,
Sharyn :)
Comment from NHazelwood
Your poem lingers in my mind love after it's been read. Full of emotion this is a bold journey! I truly enjoyed reading it and I can relate to many aspects of your poem!
Skillfully penned!
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Your poem lingers in my mind love after it's been read. Full of emotion this is a bold journey! I truly enjoyed reading it and I can relate to many aspects of your poem!
Skillfully penned!
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Bless you my dear! :)Sharyn
Comment from Jericajalane
Exceptional work. What a reality check for both the writer and the reader. As a woman, it makes me ask myself,"What are my expectations and who is exactly responsible for my happiness and sadness". What will love cause one to endure and peace of mind, let go of? Very thought provoking poem. I would have liked to seen you meet your mother in yourself at some point alone the way. Mothers are always wrong in our eyes so it is one of the more challenge accepts to write and own. Nonetheless, nicely written poem.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Exceptional work. What a reality check for both the writer and the reader. As a woman, it makes me ask myself,"What are my expectations and who is exactly responsible for my happiness and sadness". What will love cause one to endure and peace of mind, let go of? Very thought provoking poem. I would have liked to seen you meet your mother in yourself at some point alone the way. Mothers are always wrong in our eyes so it is one of the more challenge accepts to write and own. Nonetheless, nicely written poem.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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aaah, consider it done - meeting my mother, that is. You're absolutely correct. I've written whole plays about her, so why not here. I added a little tweak in the last verse. Thx so much for the in depth read, and for that suggestion!
:)Sharyn
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You are most certainly welcome.
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And welcome to you, too, my dear - I see you've just joined Fanstory! My apologies - I wanted to nominate you for a "Reviewer" help but pressed "send" before my brain was in gear. I owe you one!
:)Sharyn
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not to late:)
Thanks so much!!
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I'll ask Tom if there's a way to do it! :))
Comment from prayingpoet
An awesome free verse from beginning to end. Writer has captured feelings, thoughts, emotions from growing up within a crazy household and putting all the puzzle pieces together.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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An awesome free verse from beginning to end. Writer has captured feelings, thoughts, emotions from growing up within a crazy household and putting all the puzzle pieces together.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Bless you pp! Do they EVER come together?
:)Sharyn
Comment from mizzkris20
Puzzling Pieces
Your poem is very good. The photo is an awesome enhancement to your poem for it tells a story itself. Brilliant poem. I like your writing style
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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Puzzling Pieces
Your poem is very good. The photo is an awesome enhancement to your poem for it tells a story itself. Brilliant poem. I like your writing style
Comment Written 22-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2013
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thx so much mizzkris! :)S