Reviews from

Welcome to the Three-Ring-Circus

A high school girl challenges her low self-esteem

27 total reviews 
Comment from rheabug
Excellent
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You are so right about goodness being like a mustard seed becoming a tree of friendship. I liked your story. Something we could all take to heart.

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2011
    Thank you for reading my story.
    I believe that most of us were born with a reluctance to reach out.
    We must all convience ourselves that each of us is a good person--and reach out.
    Thank you.
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2011
    Thank you for reading my story.
    I believe that most of us were born with a reluctance to reach out.
    We must all convience ourselves that each of us is a good person--and reach out.
    Thank you.
Comment from ameyrowitz
Excellent
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There is a sustained lyrical quality to this writing. It works well as a prose poem, and the third ring is a well-chosen metaphor for Maryanne's perception of herself. Did note an extra "t" at end of "didn't" in second sentence of A Message from the Ring Master. The sequence of events carries the reader along smoothly, beginning to end. Overall, A-plus for originality.

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2011
    Thank you for reading my story, and for your editor's eye.
    Even when I spell-check, revise, re-read, and revise, I still occasional leave out a necessary word in a sentence, or mis-spell.
    Thank for pointing out the mis-spelling, my editor for the day.
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2011
    Thank you for reading my story, and for your editor's eye.
    Even when I spell-check, revise, re-read, and revise, I still occasionally leave out a necessary word in a sentence, or mis-spell.
    Thank for pointing out the mis-spelling, my editor for the day.
Comment from MizKat
Excellent
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ElPoetry001 - I really like your story. What prompted you to write something like this? It made me feel better about myself, just reading it. Bravo!! Kat

 Comment Written 21-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2011
    We all need a daily dose of affirmation, so we can embrace it, and then spread it around. I have seen the faces of those whose gift list of things they want, need, and desire, has been lost in the mail. We must not be afraid to hug our children and tell them we love them. Will some hug me please, is the silent cry of humanity.
Comment from mumsyone
Excellent
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You have presented some good ideas for friendship (and caring) in your story; things all of us could do to make friends. It would be easier for reviewers to read if you would separate the paragraphs with a space. Also, when another person starts to speak, you need to start a new paragraph, such as when Maryanne was talking to Tom. Each time on or the other speaks, you need a new paragraph.

Hi, Maryanne how was school today?" said her Mother? (.)


 Comment Written 21-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2011
    Thank you for your comments. My paramount need in writing is to read, read, and revise, revise. Then send the story to friends who will tell me how to make it better. I have never felt threatened by being in the company of competent people, because I appreciate their taking the time to help me produce a better story. Thank you for your help.
Comment from words
Excellent
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I love the message of the story.

What the young woman did to change her life and bring friendship into it was exactly the right thing to do ... she looked outside of herself and gave appreciation to those around her.

Wonderful message.

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2011
    Thank you for reading my story, and thank you for your reply. I am a novice writer and I am not sure what is good writing. I guess if others find my message and enjoy the sentiment, well, then...
Comment from sweetwoodjax
Excellent
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this is very well written, elpoetry, i enjoyed this story about the wisdom that was shared and caused a string of good feelings to be extended all over the school and moving a girl out of her shell

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2011
    Thank you for reading my story. I believe that we all let others have too much say-so as to the road we should follow, and what we should wear.
Comment from peggles
Excellent
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what a great story such vivid imagery brings it all to life I love the mystery of your words. Great short work on this one
keep it up

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 Comment Written 20-Jul-2011


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2011
    We are all Maryanne Costas [male and female]in our efforts to find acceptance, afffirmation, and love. Thank you for reading my story and taking time to write a review.