Tantalizing Eyes
Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "Chapter 10; part 1"Dishonesty VS Love. Which will win?
64 total reviews
Comment from BeKind
My mistake, I meant to give it five stars. I love the piece very much. Like I said you kept my attention. I fell love is in the air for Steven when he finally find the nerves to tgell her how he feel. Good story.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
My mistake, I meant to give it five stars. I love the piece very much. Like I said you kept my attention. I fell love is in the air for Steven when he finally find the nerves to tgell her how he feel. Good story.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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I am confused if this is a good story, and it kept your attention and it kept you wondering what was going to happen next, why did you give me a three? I don't have a clue what I did wrong. Ususally a reviewer will tell you how to improve your writing. You only told me it was 'good work'
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
A good descriptive piece of writing,
again easy to follow and understand,
bringing the story on naturally.
scooped him up, hugging him (close).
"I think the only coyotes around here are inside the house, but it is getting dark. We better start back."
"We better start back" should be connected to "it is getting dark, not as it is... thus. ..
I think the only coyotes around here are inside the house. It is getting dark, we better start back.
Well penned, Barbara. Margaret.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
A good descriptive piece of writing,
again easy to follow and understand,
bringing the story on naturally.
scooped him up, hugging him (close).
"I think the only coyotes around here are inside the house, but it is getting dark. We better start back."
"We better start back" should be connected to "it is getting dark, not as it is... thus. ..
I think the only coyotes around here are inside the house. It is getting dark, we better start back.
Well penned, Barbara. Margaret.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for catching that. It does read better. I appreciate your help.
Comment from fictionwriter
I thought this was wonderfully romantic. I'm just getting impatient for Steven to finally admit to Leya how he feels. He need to admit it to himself. Great job.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
I thought this was wonderfully romantic. I'm just getting impatient for Steven to finally admit to Leya how he feels. He need to admit it to himself. Great job.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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There will be a lot of admitting in the very near future. Thank you for your review.
Comment from knowledge
You have done a fantastic job as always. Your story and your characters are moving along smoothly as your story proceeds.
Thank You My Friend,
Knowledge
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
You have done a fantastic job as always. Your story and your characters are moving along smoothly as your story proceeds.
Thank You My Friend,
Knowledge
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for your kind words.
Comment from harleyangelbrat
Excellent chapter. I need to read the other ones. You write so well. I look forward to reading more of your work. I love the story. As I am reading it, I feel like I am right there in the story. Excellent read. I see why you are an accomplished novelist. You are a wonderful writer. God bless you.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
Excellent chapter. I need to read the other ones. You write so well. I look forward to reading more of your work. I love the story. As I am reading it, I feel like I am right there in the story. Excellent read. I see why you are an accomplished novelist. You are a wonderful writer. God bless you.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for your kind words.
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You are welcome. Have a blessed day.
Marilyn
Comment from ladybird
A very nice chapter. It was nice how you showed the tenderness between them. The walk they took out in the grounds was described well.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
A very nice chapter. It was nice how you showed the tenderness between them. The walk they took out in the grounds was described well.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for your kind words.
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You're welcome.
Comment from resilke
Dear Author,
What a lovely write. Lots of dialogue and description. Good character development. You have the voice of an author. Well done. I like the last part about it only being an owl, not a coyote. I like the coyote. The bullfrogs are a good addition too. Lots of dialogue is always key I think. Keep writing. All best,
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
Dear Author,
What a lovely write. Lots of dialogue and description. Good character development. You have the voice of an author. Well done. I like the last part about it only being an owl, not a coyote. I like the coyote. The bullfrogs are a good addition too. Lots of dialogue is always key I think. Keep writing. All best,
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for you kind review.
Comment from misscookie
nEEDless to saythis is a very moving story
It had my full attention from the first sentence to the last sentence
truly there was never a dull moment.
this is a good write.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
nEEDless to saythis is a very moving story
It had my full attention from the first sentence to the last sentence
truly there was never a dull moment.
this is a good write.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for your kind words.
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your welcome, have a nice day.
Comment from Connie P
Very well written, interesting chapter. I haven't followed the story, but this chapter was a pleasurable read. I didn't spot any problem areas at all. Nice flow...good dialogue.
Connie
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
Very well written, interesting chapter. I haven't followed the story, but this chapter was a pleasurable read. I didn't spot any problem areas at all. Nice flow...good dialogue.
Connie
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from CKLA
Great chapter, Barbara. I find myself encouraging Steven to just go ahead and kiss her. I could see no errors. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Collette
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
Great chapter, Barbara. I find myself encouraging Steven to just go ahead and kiss her. I could see no errors. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Collette
Comment Written 06-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Thank you for your kind words. I can promise you Steven will kiss her.