Detour
Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "The Decision and the Aftermath"Two very real women in not so real situation.
34 total reviews
Comment from Jim Wile
This was such a beautifully written chapter, Rachelle. Oh, my goodness, you could feel the depth of emotion in both you and Helene as you tried to convince her that your coming here was no coincidence, and that you weren't doing anything to undermine her parental influence. I think she accepted what you said, as hard as it was to hear. What a challenge that was for you to tactfully tell her the truth and not back down despite how grim and accusatory she was toward you.
And then, with perfect timing, Gretchen makes her entrance to relieve the tension for you. This is such a multi-faceted wonderful story the two of you have collaborated on. One would swear you are old friends.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
  |
This was such a beautifully written chapter, Rachelle. Oh, my goodness, you could feel the depth of emotion in both you and Helene as you tried to convince her that your coming here was no coincidence, and that you weren't doing anything to undermine her parental influence. I think she accepted what you said, as hard as it was to hear. What a challenge that was for you to tactfully tell her the truth and not back down despite how grim and accusatory she was toward you.
And then, with perfect timing, Gretchen makes her entrance to relieve the tension for you. This is such a multi-faceted wonderful story the two of you have collaborated on. One would swear you are old friends.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
This is the ultimate compliment. Thank you for such an affirming, helpful review, Jim. I could not appreciate it more. xoxox
Comment from pome lover
Love yours and Gretchen's sarcastic back and forthing.
Fun chapter; also good argument on your part with Helene.
I guess it's up to Gretchen to instigate the cavalry's rescue? I have a feeling it will be in the next chapter from her, though I really hate for this story to end. It is most enjoyable. You two make a good team.
Katharine
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
 |
Love yours and Gretchen's sarcastic back and forthing.
Fun chapter; also good argument on your part with Helene.
I guess it's up to Gretchen to instigate the cavalry's rescue? I have a feeling it will be in the next chapter from her, though I really hate for this story to end. It is most enjoyable. You two make a good team.
Katharine
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
No, in the last chapter, we received a text from my cousin that she is on her way. That's why Gretchen keeps watching the road for her/my car.
Thanks for the kind words about Gretchen's and my back-and-forth. What I love about Gretchen in real life is that she is SUCH a perfect person to hand the baton off to. I never worry for a SECOND that she will run amuck with the plotline. She enhances every chapter exponentially.
Thanks for continuing on this adventure with us. We both love having you along for the fun!! xoxoxo
-
what I meant by Gretchen's having to instigate the cavalry's rescue was, that it was up to her to write that part. I read the last chapter.
And I'm sure she says the same about you regarding handing off the baton, except I think she thinks you're (your character) I started to say crazy meaning crazy ideas, but I'll say unpredictable? that okay? :) anyway, 'tis fun reading!
-
Nothing ever insults me when it's said by someone who I know is kind and decent. So, you use whatever word you think applies, and I'll be okay with it. Thanks for yet another delightful review. oxo
-
Oh, Rachelle, my remarks were meant light heartedly, referring to the your character in the story and her fun, crazy unpredictability. Please don't feel the need to answer; I didn't think you'd mind, really that I called your character unpredictable. Anyway, who wants to be predictable.
I'm not trying to beat a dead horse, just trying to clear up a possible misunderstanding.
-
My husband refers to me as "consistently inconsistent.
Theme and variation on 'unpredictable,'I think! xoxo
-
nothin' wrong with that
-
oh, your cousin! for some reason, I thought it was Gretchen's, that's why I said it was up to her to tackle y'all's departure. My apologies again.
-
Ohhh, got it!
Comment from LJbutterfly
This imaginative chapter prompts the reader to consider what they would do about talking immediately to Helene, or waiting for Rebekah's decision.
It also made me think of the time someone asked me if she could escort my teenaged daughter to NYC to participate in a dramatic acting endeavor. She promised to take good care of her. I said, "Absolutely not."
I enjoyed your realistic description of the conversation and dialogue between you and Helene, and appreciate your acknowledgement of the differences between you and Gretchen. You've ended the chapter with a measure of suspense. What will Helene and Rebekah decide?
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
This imaginative chapter prompts the reader to consider what they would do about talking immediately to Helene, or waiting for Rebekah's decision.
It also made me think of the time someone asked me if she could escort my teenaged daughter to NYC to participate in a dramatic acting endeavor. She promised to take good care of her. I said, "Absolutely not."
I enjoyed your realistic description of the conversation and dialogue between you and Helene, and appreciate your acknowledgement of the differences between you and Gretchen. You've ended the chapter with a measure of suspense. What will Helene and Rebekah decide?
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
The thing about Rumspringa - and I find this aspect of the Amish culture so strange - is that it really is in the hands of the teen! They GET to cast out on their own, regardless of any parental reservations or protestations(!!), and then decide whether they'll return to the fold and dedicate themselves to the church or leave the life they've known and be shunned by all their friends and family! It would be the really unusual teen who could choose Door # 2, right? Still, what adult wouldn't feel worried.
At any rate, thank you for this fab review and for your feedback, as well. Both are very much appreciated.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written version of this story between you two. You used great descriptive words and very good imagery from your words. Another enjoyable read. Thanks for sharing. Teri
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
This is a very well written version of this story between you two. You used great descriptive words and very good imagery from your words. Another enjoyable read. Thanks for sharing. Teri
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
And thank YOU for reviewing!! xoxo
Comment from Mrs. KT
Good morning, Rachelle,
Kudos for another exceptionally well-crafted chapter that flows flawlessly and is rich in characterization and emotions.
So Gretchen is a "smart ass?"
Hmmm...
My kind of friend...
The two of you make a wonderful duo!
Already looking forward to your next installment!
Thank you for sharing!
fondly,
diane
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
Good morning, Rachelle,
Kudos for another exceptionally well-crafted chapter that flows flawlessly and is rich in characterization and emotions.
So Gretchen is a "smart ass?"
Hmmm...
My kind of friend...
The two of you make a wonderful duo!
Already looking forward to your next installment!
Thank you for sharing!
fondly,
diane
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
Thank you very much for this, Diane. It's that birds-of-a-feather thing for SURE. And you're another of our flock, no two ways about it!! Xoxoxo
Comment from GWHARGIS
You had me in tears and then you made me laugh. Then your author notes made me tear up again. I loved your heart to heart with Helene. Just know I would try to ease drop before I rescue you. Lol. You left that part out but I will sneak it in. This was an excellent chapter. You touched on the faith that is the foundation for them. This was really great. Gretchen
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
You had me in tears and then you made me laugh. Then your author notes made me tear up again. I loved your heart to heart with Helene. Just know I would try to ease drop before I rescue you. Lol. You left that part out but I will sneak it in. This was an excellent chapter. You touched on the faith that is the foundation for them. This was really great. Gretchen
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
Thank you, oh-one-worth-a-hundred-million-times-her-weight-in-corncobs! I love working with you so much on this project!! Xoxox
-
I'm going to have a hard time writing "the end" as well.
-
But we have our other irons in the fire!
-
We will soon know What really happened to baby Jane. (Insert manical laughter)
-
Like this: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I love the way you have woven the past and the present together here and talk of it being intentional instead of coincidence. I am a big believer in the "universe working within our lives", and this reads right out of my philosophical playbook.
Oy! The dialogue and emotion really carried this piece from beginning to end, and I think it was my favorite chapter so far.
I just wish that hug with Helene would have materialized.
Looks like you and Gretchen will have someone to pick up on your way home. By now, you must be missing the FanStory convention.
Flawlessly written, Allen. You get an "attagirl!" from me.
xoxo
PT/AH/Sicko
Wait! Didn't you rename me "stunningly stupendous" or something like that?
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
I love the way you have woven the past and the present together here and talk of it being intentional instead of coincidence. I am a big believer in the "universe working within our lives", and this reads right out of my philosophical playbook.
Oy! The dialogue and emotion really carried this piece from beginning to end, and I think it was my favorite chapter so far.
I just wish that hug with Helene would have materialized.
Looks like you and Gretchen will have someone to pick up on your way home. By now, you must be missing the FanStory convention.
Flawlessly written, Allen. You get an "attagirl!" from me.
xoxo
PT/AH/Sicko
Wait! Didn't you rename me "stunningly stupendous" or something like that?
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
Um, yes, something like that...
No, we haven't missed the convention yet. That begins Friday, and despite how long this has taken, it's only Tuesday. So hold your draught horses; there's plenty of time for your big, shining cameo appearance on here!!
Thank you for this LOVELY review, which is the first one I've read this morning. That means that no matter what ills befall me from here on today, I am armed with this impenetrable buffer. I appreciate that very, very much.
Xoxoxo
-
For the record, I like stunningly stupendous better. Except you might Freudian slip and spell it stupid:-)
-
Or just pretend to Freudian slip...
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I might be related to Gretchen being the smart a_s that I am. now please tell me why god is spelled g_d. There must be meaning doing so. Being caution not to rattle another's cage?
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
I might be related to Gretchen being the smart a_s that I am. now please tell me why god is spelled g_d. There must be meaning doing so. Being caution not to rattle another's cage?
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
Nope. As an Orthodox Jew, that is the way we write that word.
Comment from Begin Again
You have done a very fine job setting up the situation and allowing the reader to feel Helene's anger, frustration and fear as her thoughts progress. It would be a fear that Rebekah might not return but that should be her choice at her time. Enjoyed!
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
You have done a very fine job setting up the situation and allowing the reader to feel Helene's anger, frustration and fear as her thoughts progress. It would be a fear that Rebekah might not return but that should be her choice at her time. Enjoyed!
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
Yes, it's true. And even though Rumspringa is built into the Amish Ordinung, there's no way it's ever easy on the parents/loving g adults in the departing teens life.
Comment from royowen
I could probably classify you both as an odd couple, sort of like the two in the famous film, and later the sitcom. Yes, I suppose you are a good matchless twosome, the good thing is your backgrounds are so different, beautifully written, blessings Roy
Typo : bringing masking tape (for) to place? Across your mouth,
2: because her own (mamm)?
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
|
I could probably classify you both as an odd couple, sort of like the two in the famous film, and later the sitcom. Yes, I suppose you are a good matchless twosome, the good thing is your backgrounds are so different, beautifully written, blessings Roy
Typo : bringing masking tape (for) to place? Across your mouth,
2: because her own (mamm)?
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2024
-
Wow, Roy! You've finally reviewed my part of this novel! After the dust-up we had after my Corey Brooker quote, I thought I'd fallen out of your good graces forever. Welcome aboard! I'll check out the edits you suggested.