Acrostic (my pain inside)
A Site Contest Entry29 total reviews
Comment from Jill D
I find it hard enough to write a poem let alone a certain type of poem, 'Acrostic' poem in this case but when you produce something as beautiful and emotional as this while keeping within conformity it's such a talent!
All the best!
Jill:)
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
I find it hard enough to write a poem let alone a certain type of poem, 'Acrostic' poem in this case but when you produce something as beautiful and emotional as this while keeping within conformity it's such a talent!
All the best!
Jill:)
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you, Jill, for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
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You're welcome:)
Comment from Brenda Strauser
This poem is so heartfelt. I feel your pain in your words. How true your words are that love for someone can be hard to overcome. Well written. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
This poem is so heartfelt. I feel your pain in your words. How true your words are that love for someone can be hard to overcome. Well written. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you very much for your wonderful and encouraging comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I am unsure what the cause may have been but the effect seemingly is everafter, It came on a day, the night after my daughter called, and said her husband loves her but is no longer "in love." And this a few days after their fourth anniversary.
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
I am unsure what the cause may have been but the effect seemingly is everafter, It came on a day, the night after my daughter called, and said her husband loves her but is no longer "in love." And this a few days after their fourth anniversary.
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you, Tom, sorry to bring up sad memories, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
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In the long run it may be a blessing. At least there is no child involved.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
First sentence: time's release instead of times
That last line really says it all: entombed I am within my truth. This loss seems to have taken away your narrator's life. An emotional read and those emotions are well expressed in this acrostic.
Very nice overall presentation, as well.
Good luck in the contest.
xo
Pam
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
First sentence: time's release instead of times
That last line really says it all: entombed I am within my truth. This loss seems to have taken away your narrator's life. An emotional read and those emotions are well expressed in this acrostic.
Very nice overall presentation, as well.
Good luck in the contest.
xo
Pam
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you, Pam, for your very encouraging and helpful have corrected) comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Nicely done and I forgot it was an acrostic until the end. My favourite stanza is the third when the syntax really shines and the emotion is more fluent. That heart in the image is so embedded and needing to be freed up. Well done and good luck! Debbie
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
Nicely done and I forgot it was an acrostic until the end. My favourite stanza is the third when the syntax really shines and the emotion is more fluent. That heart in the image is so embedded and needing to be freed up. Well done and good luck! Debbie
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from bob cullen
Nicely written. I 'think' I picked up on one rather minor error. In the first line, I think 'times' should be 'time's.' I understand this may be considered petty nit-picking. But I'm pointing it out so you can correct it.
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
Nicely written. I 'think' I picked up on one rather minor error. In the first line, I think 'times' should be 'time's.' I understand this may be considered petty nit-picking. But I'm pointing it out so you can correct it.
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you, Bob, for your wonderful comments, and help, have corrected, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from June Sargent
It's difficult enough to write an acrostic that makes sense, but to include rhymes is an amazing feat. This poem is poignant and sad, but real. Love's agony and ecstasy are captured well.
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
It's difficult enough to write an acrostic that makes sense, but to include rhymes is an amazing feat. This poem is poignant and sad, but real. Love's agony and ecstasy are captured well.
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from royowen
The trouble is we cannot possess our own truth, Christ is the truth, the only thing in Heaven and Earth that is, this is a great Acrostic, it is a classic among the acrostics I've seen, we could be entombed within or or version of the truth, well.done, beautifully written, blessings Roy
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reply by the author on 30-May-2024
The trouble is we cannot possess our own truth, Christ is the truth, the only thing in Heaven and Earth that is, this is a great Acrostic, it is a classic among the acrostics I've seen, we could be entombed within or or version of the truth, well.done, beautifully written, blessings Roy
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you, Roy, for this very understanding review and encouraging comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
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Most welcome
Comment from lyenochka
This feels so sad. Something happened to end a deep relationship but the narrator keeps his vow and continues to love despite the unexpected end. The devotion continues even if not reciprocated. I really liked "Entombed I am within my truth".
Never accepting loves demise (love's)
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
This feels so sad. Something happened to end a deep relationship but the narrator keeps his vow and continues to love despite the unexpected end. The devotion continues even if not reciprocated. I really liked "Entombed I am within my truth".
Never accepting loves demise (love's)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-May-2024
reply by the author on 30-May-2024
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Thank you for your wonderful comments and help, I thought I had this one, I'm back home with mom, I think the weather gets me thinking this way, as always very much appreciated****kahpot