Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

I really like how you captured this feeling of yearning for the loved one and her determination to keep searching for him. I liked:"tangled in the penumbra of your absence." But the narrator is full of love for the missing one so I think her soul is more "unloved" instead of "loveless."

 Comment Written 30-Nov-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Dec-2023

Thank you, big sister. I changed it to unloved. I appreciate your helpful and kind review.

Love

Marival

reply by lyenochka on 01-Dec-2023

It was all up to you. They use "loveless" for a marriage where the couple doesn't love each other so I thought it didn't describe the situation.

Comment from Sugarray77

Excellent

Hello Gypsy... your FV is very nicely penned and has that feeling of depth and angst that comes from the writings of a talented poet. Well done and a great read.

Melissa

 Comment Written 30-Nov-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Dec-2023

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from patcelaw

Excellent

This is a very lovely poem that you have written. I enjoyed listening to it and you have presented it beautifully. I wish you the very best for all of your writing and I hope that you will have a wonderful evening and a good weekend. Patricia.

 Comment Written 30-Nov-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Dec-2023

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from kiwigirl2821

Excellent

I guess I haven't read one of your pieces that wasn't a Haiku, other than the one liner, in quite a while. This is a glorious write and is beautifully illustrated. Loved the smoky warm evening feeling this one evokes. Such a beauty you!

Kiwi

 Comment Written 30-Nov-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Dec-2023

I write a lot of free verse and all kinds of Japanese poetry . It's my favorite (*÷*)

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from GWHARGIS

Excellent

In the grand scheme everything, every emotion is relevant. But when heartbreak hits it makes everything pointless. We put every part of life's importance on someone we love. Without them, there is no reason. Great poem . Gretchen

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 Comment Written 30-Nov-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Dec-2023

Gretchen, thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

sad but this was very cool imagery!
i liked the colourless valleys and pointless mountains
nice smooth flow

thank you for sharing
shelley :)
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This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 30-Nov-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Dec-2023

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy hugs