Phone me a Memory
Many things trigger memories36 total reviews
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
This is so clever and imaginative and, by the end, I could see them all stepping out of the telephone diary. A lovely little reminiscence story which warms the heart. Well done, Barry! And good luck! Debbie
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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This is so clever and imaginative and, by the end, I could see them all stepping out of the telephone diary. A lovely little reminiscence story which warms the heart. Well done, Barry! And good luck! Debbie
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Debbie, thanks for the review. Glad you liked it. I must admit to having a tear in the eye when writing. You take care and have a wonderful day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is an excellent story. I enjoyed reading it. Your presentation is very good, too. You also use descriptive words and colorful imagery that draw in a reader.
Every day, something I see, or hear, brings back memories of a loved one who has passed. I can relate..
Best wishes!
Alexandra
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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This is an excellent story. I enjoyed reading it. Your presentation is very good, too. You also use descriptive words and colorful imagery that draw in a reader.
Every day, something I see, or hear, brings back memories of a loved one who has passed. I can relate..
Best wishes!
Alexandra
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Alexandra, thanks so much for your kind review. Glad you enjoyed it. I must admit to having a tear in my eye when writing. Take care and have a wonderful day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Your first line will draw the reader in. This is a very clever unique approach to how one describes their memories. You showed, rather than telling. Something I have trouble with. Very well done.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Your first line will draw the reader in. This is a very clever unique approach to how one describes their memories. You showed, rather than telling. Something I have trouble with. Very well done.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Liz, thanks for your kind review. Yes there is a bit of a tug of war between show and tell. I have to watch that as well. Take care and have a wonderful day.
Regards
Barry
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True
Comment from Wayne Fowler
You got me.
I wondered what you meant by 'turning further'. Surely not further toward the entry door? Your surprise ending was excellent. What a great way to remember vivid details, by deliberately scanning through an address book. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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You got me.
I wondered what you meant by 'turning further'. Surely not further toward the entry door? Your surprise ending was excellent. What a great way to remember vivid details, by deliberately scanning through an address book. Best wishes.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Wayne, thanks for your kind review. Glad you got a surprise at the end. Take care and have a wonderful day.
Regards
Barry Penfold
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Barry, this is a well written and while fiction, I find it reflects real event and memories. Recently, I found a small telephone book with numbers of former office friends that go back to 1986.
Like your story, it brought back so many memories and pictures of the past.
Well done
Good luck in the contest.
Mary
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Barry, this is a well written and while fiction, I find it reflects real event and memories. Recently, I found a small telephone book with numbers of former office friends that go back to 1986.
Like your story, it brought back so many memories and pictures of the past.
Well done
Good luck in the contest.
Mary
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Mary, thanks for your review and I am glad you liked the story.
Yes, telephone diaries, address books etc are a real source of memories. Actually had a tear in my eye when writing this.
Take care and have a wonderful day .
Regards
Barry
Comment from BethShelby
Good flash fiction. I know what you mean. I look in an book where phone numbers are written and the same thing happens. All those memories of the people who where a part of my life comes back. It is strange how just seeing the name of person you haven't thought of in a while can trigger so many memories.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Good flash fiction. I know what you mean. I look in an book where phone numbers are written and the same thing happens. All those memories of the people who where a part of my life comes back. It is strange how just seeing the name of person you haven't thought of in a while can trigger so many memories.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Beth, Thanks for providing a review and I am glad you enjoyed it. Yes, the brain has a wonderful ability to bring those memories to the fore when there is a trigger, such as a phone book. Take care and have a wonderful day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
Comment from estory
This post captures the real emotions we go through when remembering lost loved ones. Opening this phone book or address book is like opening a photograph album; the life that is gone comes back to life, standing right before our eyes, for a brief moment. Until the book closes and the here and now demand our carrying on with our own lives. There's a great poignancy to this post, a lot of raw emotion. Some interesting posts today in this vein. Good writing. estory
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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This post captures the real emotions we go through when remembering lost loved ones. Opening this phone book or address book is like opening a photograph album; the life that is gone comes back to life, standing right before our eyes, for a brief moment. Until the book closes and the here and now demand our carrying on with our own lives. There's a great poignancy to this post, a lot of raw emotion. Some interesting posts today in this vein. Good writing. estory
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Thank you so much for your review. Glad you enjoyed it. I actually had a tear in my eye when typing it up.
Take care and have a great day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
Comment from LJbutterfly
Good flash fiction describes a moment in time. This story described the moment the protagonist opened his fathers telephone diary and read the names of listed relatives. Each name prompted a memory. What a creative idea. Well done. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Good flash fiction describes a moment in time. This story described the moment the protagonist opened his fathers telephone diary and read the names of listed relatives. Each name prompted a memory. What a creative idea. Well done. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Thank you so much for your kind review. We will see how it stacks up against the other entries. Take care and have a wonderful day.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
Comment from GWHARGIS
Oh my goodness! This was awesome. You need a six. I actually felt like I was watching a family reunion. It was so heartwarming. You gave us enough details to see and hear the group. This was like eating expensive chocolate. Savoring every bite. Gretchen
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Oh my goodness! This was awesome. You need a six. I actually felt like I was watching a family reunion. It was so heartwarming. You gave us enough details to see and hear the group. This was like eating expensive chocolate. Savoring every bite. Gretchen
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Gretchen,
Thanks so much for your kind review. Glad you like it. I believe I must give you the prize for the description of the year "this was like eating expensive chocolate. Savoring every bite." Take Care.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
Comment from Paul Manton
A very nice but simple idea, Barry, and it works very well for a short scale piece of writing.
The idea that your recall could engender a real presence of each person might appear rather 'spooky', but you have handled it better than that. We are led to imagine that the actual people arrive to visit as you're in the middle of reading the book. So, at the denouement, we are surprised that they all suddenly disappear!
A really well told story for a flash fiction contest.
Paul
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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A very nice but simple idea, Barry, and it works very well for a short scale piece of writing.
The idea that your recall could engender a real presence of each person might appear rather 'spooky', but you have handled it better than that. We are led to imagine that the actual people arrive to visit as you're in the middle of reading the book. So, at the denouement, we are surprised that they all suddenly disappear!
A really well told story for a flash fiction contest.
Paul
Comment Written 16-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2023
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Paul,
Thanks so much for your kind review. Yes simple but effective idea. We will see how it goes in the contest. Take care and have a wonderful day.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
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Thank you, Barry.
Best wishes, Paul
