Tanka Collection
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Middle of the Night"Romantic Tanka Poems
26 total reviews
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
This is beautifully written poem with a sultry undertone. The illustration drew me in instantly and eased me into your words. Your imagery is vivid as is the emotion felt. Well done!
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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This is beautifully written poem with a sultry undertone. The illustration drew me in instantly and eased me into your words. Your imagery is vivid as is the emotion felt. Well done!
Comment Written 13-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Thank you very much, KL. Your exceptional review means a lot to me.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from kahpot
Beautiful though sad, when pain is your constant companion it is very hard to find some alone time, and the pain of memories cannot be fixed with medicine, an excellent read that many will relate to****kahpot
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Beautiful though sad, when pain is your constant companion it is very hard to find some alone time, and the pain of memories cannot be fixed with medicine, an excellent read that many will relate to****kahpot
Comment Written 13-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Thank you very much, Kym. Your exceptional review means a lot to me.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from juliaSjames
Exceptional romantic write, Gypsy
Killer opening!
Love that you added the modern touch of stalking on Facebook. And that bar "with too many waiters" is a great example of show not tell.
I think the irony of her tenderly cradling and tucking in her broken heart in lieu of her lost love is a perfect ending.
Couple of suggestions.
"Hot tears ..."
"I cradle you"
Best of luck in the contest. This is a superb offering.
Stay safe and blessed
Julia
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Exceptional romantic write, Gypsy
Killer opening!
Love that you added the modern touch of stalking on Facebook. And that bar "with too many waiters" is a great example of show not tell.
I think the irony of her tenderly cradling and tucking in her broken heart in lieu of her lost love is a perfect ending.
Couple of suggestions.
"Hot tears ..."
"I cradle you"
Best of luck in the contest. This is a superb offering.
Stay safe and blessed
Julia
Comment Written 13-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Thank you very much, Julia. Your exceptional review and six stars mean a lot to me. Thank you for the edits, I fixed it.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from John Ciarmello
Beautiful! A broken love... Perhaps replaced by an old friend. His presence isn't evil. It's a disjointed comfort that in some way feeds an empty heart and fills it with a distant pain, or perhaps unattainable love. You are incredible. I love your work!
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reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Beautiful! A broken love... Perhaps replaced by an old friend. His presence isn't evil. It's a disjointed comfort that in some way feeds an empty heart and fills it with a distant pain, or perhaps unattainable love. You are incredible. I love your work!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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Thank you very much. Your exceptional review means a lot to me.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from prettybluebirds
This poem is lovely and one can feel the emotion in every word. It is sad and I like the ending where she tells the pain good night. I see this is a contest entry so I wish you all the luck in the world. It should do well in the contest.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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This poem is lovely and one can feel the emotion in every word. It is sad and I like the ending where she tells the pain good night. I see this is a contest entry so I wish you all the luck in the world. It should do well in the contest.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
-
Thank you very much. Your excellent review means a lot to me.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from jessizero
I feel this deeply. You have evoked such strong emotion here. Congratulations. This was a beautiful piece of free verse. Thank you so much for sharing.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
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I feel this deeply. You have evoked such strong emotion here. Congratulations. This was a beautiful piece of free verse. Thank you so much for sharing.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2022
-
Thank you very much. Your exceptional review and six stars mean a lot to me.
Gypsy hugs