Betrayal
Viewing comments for Chapter 38 "Betrayal Chapter 38"In the title.
36 total reviews
Comment from Ric Myworld
I could easily give you six stars on everything you write, if they would give us enough to go around. But until then, I'll just keep reading and enjoying your talents. Thanks for sharing. :-)
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
  |
I could easily give you six stars on everything you write, if they would give us enough to go around. But until then, I'll just keep reading and enjoying your talents. Thanks for sharing. :-)
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
What a lovely compliment, Ric, thank you so much. I know what you mean about having enough of the gold stars to go round. I'm always running out of them too fast. Thank you for giving me one of yours, my friend, I really appreciated that, and your kind words. Sending your a warm hug! Love Sandra xxx
Comment from aryr
Another great continuation chapter, Sandra. It was a great relief that Grant and Shadow found Anna and her two children. However it was with annoyance that Grant realized he had left Pete, Jose and the women and of course Peanut at home alone. It will be interesting to see how Sam and Ben deal with Rapier. Great job, very much enjoyed. Blessing, hugs and smiles.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
 |
Another great continuation chapter, Sandra. It was a great relief that Grant and Shadow found Anna and her two children. However it was with annoyance that Grant realized he had left Pete, Jose and the women and of course Peanut at home alone. It will be interesting to see how Sam and Ben deal with Rapier. Great job, very much enjoyed. Blessing, hugs and smiles.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Thank you, Alie, for another of your lovely review. I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part. We are closing in now, so not too many parts left. Warm hugs, my friend. :))Sandra
-
You are most welcome Sandra. This is very enjoyable reading.
Comment from Pam (respa)
-This is an action packed chapter, Sandra.
-Poor Anna and the kids; they had to be
so traumatized, hungry, and more.
-You did a good job describing how
Grant and his men were able to find them.
-I wouldn't have been as calm as Anna, though.
-You give us insight into what Max had had
to deal with as a boy, and it wasn't pretty.
-No wonder he turned out the way he did.
-You capture his total feeling of fear when
he hears Peter with the dogs.
-Grant does make a good point at the end;
right now, Peter is lucky he has the dogs,
luckier than he knows, and the others, too!
-You leave us with a lot of suspense at the end;
I imagine those dogs know exactly where to go,
and what to do.
-Well done.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
-This is an action packed chapter, Sandra.
-Poor Anna and the kids; they had to be
so traumatized, hungry, and more.
-You did a good job describing how
Grant and his men were able to find them.
-I wouldn't have been as calm as Anna, though.
-You give us insight into what Max had had
to deal with as a boy, and it wasn't pretty.
-No wonder he turned out the way he did.
-You capture his total feeling of fear when
he hears Peter with the dogs.
-Grant does make a good point at the end;
right now, Peter is lucky he has the dogs,
luckier than he knows, and the others, too!
-You leave us with a lot of suspense at the end;
I imagine those dogs know exactly where to go,
and what to do.
-Well done.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Thank you so much for your lovely review, dear Pam, and the bright sixth star. I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part. I wanted the children to be safe, I didn't fancy the idea of them locked up like that forever.
There aren't many parts left now, as you will see in the next part. Thank you again, my dear friend. Sending you a special hug, love, Sandra xxx
-
You are very welcome and deserving of the stars and review, Sandra. I'm very glad you didn't want the kids to linger there, or Anna, either! It sounds like things are moving right along. Good luck with finishing it up.
Comment from damommy
What a chapter! Whew! I was afraid Grant wouldn't think of the attic. Now, it's dawned on him that Rapier is on the island. The dogs have caught his scent. I hope they rip him to pieces. Don't keep me waiting long to find out what happens. I'm on the edge of my seat!
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
What a chapter! Whew! I was afraid Grant wouldn't think of the attic. Now, it's dawned on him that Rapier is on the island. The dogs have caught his scent. I hope they rip him to pieces. Don't keep me waiting long to find out what happens. I'm on the edge of my seat!
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
LOL, I didn't realise my dear sister had a wicked streak!! You, and many others, want Rapier to suffer a horrific end! Lol. Thank you so much for this review, you really do make me laugh. And I'm sending you the biggest sisterly hug for the lovely sixth star. Thanks dear one. :)) Sandra xx
I've been catching up on all the emails you've sent me, and I loved the one about the student who gained a whopping 0 for her answers. That was so clever. Do you fancy a face to face chat this later this week? xxx
-
I certainly do. Let me know when.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
OH, OH. Rapier has been identified as an intruder on the island. I think two German Shephard's and Peter should be able to handle him until help arrives. One spot here you wrote OK where I believe it should be Okay. One of the first
corrections I received here on FS as a writer. LOL Well done, Sandra. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
OH, OH. Rapier has been identified as an intruder on the island. I think two German Shephard's and Peter should be able to handle him until help arrives. One spot here you wrote OK where I believe it should be Okay. One of the first
corrections I received here on FS as a writer. LOL Well done, Sandra. Nancy:)
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Yes, the dogs know when there is danger around. You are right, Peter will manage with those German shepherds, they won't stand any nonsence. Thanks for that tip, Nancy, I've changed it to 'okay' I'll remember that in future. Warm hugs, dear friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
You are a master of tantalization! Always a twist that leaves us begging for the next. Stunning backstory on Rapier enrichens the already rich narrative.
He didn't know how long he'd laid=>LAIN there,
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
You are a master of tantalization! Always a twist that leaves us begging for the next. Stunning backstory on Rapier enrichens the already rich narrative.
He didn't know how long he'd laid=>LAIN there,
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Thank you, Liz, that is a huge compliment!! Lol. Thanks for finding that error, I've corrected it now. There is always one (or more) Thanks for the lovely comments, my friend. Warm hugs. Sandra xxx
-
i neevr maek tpyos
-
LOL!! You are such fun. :)) xx
Comment from Sally Law
Oh my, this chapter was riveting! Cold-blooded killers don't just happen the are usually at the other end of unimaginable cruelty and abuse. I think I breathed at the end.... Exceptional, dear Ssndra. I can hardly wait for the next chapter. Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs....
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
Oh my, this chapter was riveting! Cold-blooded killers don't just happen the are usually at the other end of unimaginable cruelty and abuse. I think I breathed at the end.... Exceptional, dear Ssndra. I can hardly wait for the next chapter. Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs....
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
What a lovely review, thank you so much, Sal, I really love it. And the sixth gold star! I'm delighted you enjoyed it. Sending you a humongous hug, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Pantygynt
This is action-packed tense stuff and moves along at a tremendous pace. The flashback to Rapier's first kill was good but I have one suggestion. You end the flashback and after the stars return to the other group of characters. I think you should return your flasbacked character back to his present briefly, just a single sentence, then the stars then back to the others.
Apart from that and this touch of spag it is a great chapter.
'he hoped he'd drank so much...' Drank is the simple past - I drank coffee yesterday. Drunk is the past participle, used for the present perfect and past perfect - I have never drunk coffee, I had never drunk coffee. So this should be, 'he hoped he'd drunk so much.'
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
This is action-packed tense stuff and moves along at a tremendous pace. The flashback to Rapier's first kill was good but I have one suggestion. You end the flashback and after the stars return to the other group of characters. I think you should return your flasbacked character back to his present briefly, just a single sentence, then the stars then back to the others.
Apart from that and this touch of spag it is a great chapter.
'he hoped he'd drank so much...' Drank is the simple past - I drank coffee yesterday. Drunk is the past participle, used for the present perfect and past perfect - I have never drunk coffee, I had never drunk coffee. So this should be, 'he hoped he'd drunk so much.'
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Thank you so much, Jim, for this helpful review. I've made that silly correction. You've never believe I went to school a century ago!! Lol. I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was rather long but I didn't realise until the end just how long it was. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from BethShelby
The story is chilling. Rapier has a long history as a killer that goes back to when he was a child. I understand his feeling for his evil father, but the satisfaction he got from plunging that knife started him on a career of being a killer. Now we have him watching Peter with the dogs. I'm anxious to learn what comes next. You are doing a great job of building suspense.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
The story is chilling. Rapier has a long history as a killer that goes back to when he was a child. I understand his feeling for his evil father, but the satisfaction he got from plunging that knife started him on a career of being a killer. Now we have him watching Peter with the dogs. I'm anxious to learn what comes next. You are doing a great job of building suspense.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Thank you, Beth, for this lovely review. Yes, Rapier started young, and it makes you wonder if he'd had a nice father would he be like he is now? This happens a lot in real life, unfortunately. Thanks again, my friend. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from Begin Again
Outstanding but I would never expect less! The tension built as they searched, then almost left, and searched again was awesome... I do think his worry for the people on the island clouded his thoughts of leaving Anna alone without protection even if he believes Rapier to be gone.
the back story explains a lot as to why he went wrong, but it doesn't redeem him from the atrocious things he's done. Life throws us curve balls, it is up to us to move out of the way.
And of course, I pray (sorry Lord) but since it's not real maybe I shall be forgiven.... but let those doggies chew him up. At least enough so he can be apprehended and Grant and the guys can arrive.
Awesome story! Smiles and hugs, my friend.... Excellent job!
Love ya, Carol
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
|
Outstanding but I would never expect less! The tension built as they searched, then almost left, and searched again was awesome... I do think his worry for the people on the island clouded his thoughts of leaving Anna alone without protection even if he believes Rapier to be gone.
the back story explains a lot as to why he went wrong, but it doesn't redeem him from the atrocious things he's done. Life throws us curve balls, it is up to us to move out of the way.
And of course, I pray (sorry Lord) but since it's not real maybe I shall be forgiven.... but let those doggies chew him up. At least enough so he can be apprehended and Grant and the guys can arrive.
Awesome story! Smiles and hugs, my friend.... Excellent job!
Love ya, Carol
Comment Written 27-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2021
-
Aww, bless you, Carol, what a lovely review. I must tell you, you are not the only one who wants him 'chewed up' lol!! You are right, it doesn't excuse him for what he's done. The fact that he enjoys killing shows there is more to him than just his father beating him. I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part, my friend. Thanks so much! Warm hugs and love. Sandra xxx