flurries float like butterflies
2-2-5-7-5 contest - a winter vision14 total reviews
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Oh, Mark, I really do like this one -- the alliteration is so very well inter-woven that the whole image just rolls off the tongue and into the imagination... great job!! ;) :) The only thing I would even touch would be to change the 'dash' to a 'tilde' just because it is softer for the whole aura you've got going on: the dash is just too harsh (IMHO)... ;) I expect to see this one in the winner's circle, sir!! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck! :) Yvette
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
Oh, Mark, I really do like this one -- the alliteration is so very well inter-woven that the whole image just rolls off the tongue and into the imagination... great job!! ;) :) The only thing I would even touch would be to change the 'dash' to a 'tilde' just because it is softer for the whole aura you've got going on: the dash is just too harsh (IMHO)... ;) I expect to see this one in the winner's circle, sir!! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck! :) Yvette
Comment Written 05-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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Yvette,
You seem to review almost all of my short verse entries. I really 'thank you' for that. I am always encouraged by your review and comments (I just changed to the tilde). As you know, I do try to slip in alliteration into my FS posts.
So your extra star makes me feel very, very good with lots of smiles!
I will keep writing and hope you will continue to review the same.
Mark
Comment from Janetsue
This is really a striking posting, Mark. I like everything about it. Sorry I don't have a six left. Best wishes in the contest! You've been very active lately and it is bound to pay off as we are growing with every posting. :-)
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
This is really a striking posting, Mark. I like everything about it. Sorry I don't have a six left. Best wishes in the contest! You've been very active lately and it is bound to pay off as we are growing with every posting. :-)
Comment Written 05-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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Thanks Janet! I do appreciate your six-like review. Pleased you enjoyed the same.
Mark
Comment from JudyE
You've used effective analogy comparing butterflies to snowflakes - both so beautiful but short-lived. We could do with a bit of 'cold' here. 40C expected today. Good luck in the contest.
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reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
You've used effective analogy comparing butterflies to snowflakes - both so beautiful but short-lived. We could do with a bit of 'cold' here. 40C expected today. Good luck in the contest.
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Comment Written 05-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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Judy
We have 38 F but almost 60 centimeters of heavy snow! Can we exchange something to resolve our weather issues? LOL
Mark
Comment from Alex Rosel
I enjoyed reading this. I've seen various other poems refer to gossamer snowflakes, but your inclusion of "limited lifespans" added that little something extra {thumbs up}.
Best of luck with the competition {smiles}.
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reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
I enjoyed reading this. I've seen various other poems refer to gossamer snowflakes, but your inclusion of "limited lifespans" added that little something extra {thumbs up}.
Best of luck with the competition {smiles}.
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Comment Written 05-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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Alex
Thanks for your encouraging review, good luck, and thumbs up! I also tried to slip in alliterations into this contest entry. (-;
Mark