Touch
My thoughts on life.21 total reviews
Comment from Artasylum
Wow... what a great contest entry for free verse. It is so expressive all of the way through...
Now, at exactly the right Time and the Right Place...
When the Planets were aligned...
Never again to be acknowledged...
And, never again to be seen...
The Triplets created our Planet of Birth!
Which we call today, 'Earth.'
They then started by first, creating, 'The Light.'
Followed with, 'The Dark.'
Which separated Time...
(Night and Day)
They then rested on 'The Seventh Day.'
And, realized that...
'This was Good.'
...
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2018
  |
Wow... what a great contest entry for free verse. It is so expressive all of the way through...
Now, at exactly the right Time and the Right Place...
When the Planets were aligned...
Never again to be acknowledged...
And, never again to be seen...
The Triplets created our Planet of Birth!
Which we call today, 'Earth.'
They then started by first, creating, 'The Light.'
Followed with, 'The Dark.'
Which separated Time...
(Night and Day)
They then rested on 'The Seventh Day.'
And, realized that...
'This was Good.'
...
Comment Written 21-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2018
-
Sounds like I got a new fan?
Thanks Art.
Doctor Ricky 1024
Comment from TPAC
A very religious write detailing common concepts of faith expounding the origin of things in existence. Can't kick someone beliefs but will state beyond views thought there is true factors. My opinion about this write.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
|
A very religious write detailing common concepts of faith expounding the origin of things in existence. Can't kick someone beliefs but will state beyond views thought there is true factors. My opinion about this write.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
-
True .
Some are my thoughts, some from a writer here, some from the Holy Bible, and the rest from a piece I write years ago entitled...
"Creation!"
Doctor Ricky 1024
Comment from kahpot
What a beautiful read " we know today is heaven" suggesting every day is heaven, I enjoyed this read very much and look forward to the next part, very well done and best wishes for your contest****kahpot
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
|
What a beautiful read " we know today is heaven" suggesting every day is heaven, I enjoyed this read very much and look forward to the next part, very well done and best wishes for your contest****kahpot
Comment Written 21-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
-
Thanks kahpot.
Much appreciated.
Doctor Ricky 1024
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
"Touch", is an extremely well-written and spiritually-uplifting piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. More stringent editing would not be wasted. Spelling errors, even small ones should be avoided at all costs.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
|
"Touch", is an extremely well-written and spiritually-uplifting piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. More stringent editing would not be wasted. Spelling errors, even small ones should be avoided at all costs.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
-
Thanks duchess and Part Number Two was just added and complete.
Doctor Ricky 1024
-
Doctor Ricky1024, you're welcome and congratulations on part two.
Take care and God bless you,
the Duchess
-
"Written Within the Boundaries of My Heart"
Next and thanks!
Ricky....
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Wow - this is an unusually long write for you, but I really appreciate all the imagery and imagination involved in the relation of the Trinity to the triplets and the creation story -- interesting write, Doc! :) ;) Thanx for sharing such a smiling shout out to the Lord! :) Yvette
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
|
Wow - this is an unusually long write for you, but I really appreciate all the imagery and imagination involved in the relation of the Trinity to the triplets and the creation story -- interesting write, Doc! :) ;) Thanx for sharing such a smiling shout out to the Lord! :) Yvette
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
-
Thanks this is one of my better works.
Ricky...
Comment from Gloria ....
Another lovely shared poem, Ricky. Observing and recording events with purity of heart and mind is always good.
Much enjoyed and many thanks to you for sharing.
Gloria
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
|
Another lovely shared poem, Ricky. Observing and recording events with purity of heart and mind is always good.
Much enjoyed and many thanks to you for sharing.
Gloria
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
-
Thanks Gloria for your time and consideration.
Ricky...
Comment from estory
I think you captured the energy, the imagination, of creation with this poem. I liked the minimalistic, repetitions, especially in the beginning, that kind of set this poem off on its journey. And then it just unfolded in an amazing free verse romp through all the images of creation. Very imaginative, very original, unique. estory
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
|
I think you captured the energy, the imagination, of creation with this poem. I liked the minimalistic, repetitions, especially in the beginning, that kind of set this poem off on its journey. And then it just unfolded in an amazing free verse romp through all the images of creation. Very imaginative, very original, unique. estory
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
-
Thanks estory.
This was a fun write.
Doctor Ricky 1024
Comment from royowen
A wonderfully designed, fashioned and description of God the Father, God the Som, and God the Holy Spirit, all interdependent, collectively needed nothing, no one, and all one, in agreement. With various function of the whole. But love shares, the best thing God can give...Himself! Well done, Ricky, great definition of God. Well dine, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
|
A wonderfully designed, fashioned and description of God the Father, God the Som, and God the Holy Spirit, all interdependent, collectively needed nothing, no one, and all one, in agreement. With various function of the whole. But love shares, the best thing God can give...Himself! Well done, Ricky, great definition of God. Well dine, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
-
Thanks Roy.
And I know how much it means to you since I have reviewed similar works of yours.
Doctor Ricky 1024
-
Most welcome Ricky
Comment from Earl Corp
Interesting take on the book of Genesis. You also could have held this for a story. I mean it works as a poem, but it tells a story too. But I guess all poetry does too, but not as plainly as this one does.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
|
Interesting take on the book of Genesis. You also could have held this for a story. I mean it works as a poem, but it tells a story too. But I guess all poetry does too, but not as plainly as this one does.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
-
It free Verse my version.
Thanks Earl.
Ricky
Comment from Pantygynt
I shall start with an apology, for I do intend to mark this at less than the five stars that are so often unthinkingly given out to almost everything that is produced here. But this is not excellent.
To start with it is littered with spelling mistakes, showing that either it is the work of someone who is not aware of correct spelling or has not taken the trouble to read the thing through on completion.
Second I can find little in it that is poetic. Where are the poetic devices that would entitle it to be classified as poetry? I cannot find them. This reads like prose anbd looks a bit like poetry that has been arbitrarily cut up into different line lengths in order to be considered as poetry. That is not what makes free verse free verse.
I am grading it as good because anything less would be an insult to the book of Genesis, which tells the same story and, in the King James version, with considerably better poetry.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
 |
I shall start with an apology, for I do intend to mark this at less than the five stars that are so often unthinkingly given out to almost everything that is produced here. But this is not excellent.
To start with it is littered with spelling mistakes, showing that either it is the work of someone who is not aware of correct spelling or has not taken the trouble to read the thing through on completion.
Second I can find little in it that is poetic. Where are the poetic devices that would entitle it to be classified as poetry? I cannot find them. This reads like prose anbd looks a bit like poetry that has been arbitrarily cut up into different line lengths in order to be considered as poetry. That is not what makes free verse free verse.
I am grading it as good because anything less would be an insult to the book of Genesis, which tells the same story and, in the King James version, with considerably better poetry.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
-
Sorry u missed the point but the Lord loves all sinners
-
No. I didn't miss the point. I was reviewing it from the point of view of its form, its construction rather than its content, which is what we are instructed to do in the guidelines.
-
I review for content first and then if necessary Grammar
-
The only problem with reviewing for content is that if the reviewer disagrees with what the poet is saying he is likely to penalise the poem and that is not what reviewing is about.
-
I have had it happen to me all the time.
With grammar issues.
Ricky
-
Perhaps you should leave to lie and review it yourself several times before posting. I frequently rewrite several times befoe i am happy.
