Reviews from

Act of Endurance

Viewing comments for Chapter 99 " Living In A Shadow"
Dawn of Chaos

29 total reviews 
Comment from KyColonel Randal
Excellent
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Thank you for sharing this poem. You have added an appropriate illustration which improves your poem's presentation as well as increased the font size (which is much appreciated). You may consider manipulating the background and font color as well. You have entered a free verse contest, and this poem seems to be a good fit for that. Good luck with your contest entry!

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 25-Apr-2019
    Past tense the contest, glad aspects in this write were appealing to your interests, revisions are forth going, learning grammar. Thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
Comment from Randa Dayle
Excellent
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Competition writing prompt. Nicely down. I actually was very intrigued by your photo I love taking pictures of shadows. Your poem was very imaginative. Good luck!

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
    This picture was captivating, seen image portrayed not by me, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
Comment from Marjorie Burghdoff-Banks
Excellent
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"tingle an ear" this is such a detailed and vivid description! Great choice to describe how we hear something, how we listen. Good poem, really enjoyed reading this.

 Comment Written 21-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
    Glad to hear certain aspects of this read were appealing to your interests, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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Living in comfort zone, but within the sphere of shadow, endurance brings in freedom, confidence helps living light in shadow; well said, well done. Thank you for sharing. Keep Writing Inspire Changing -- DR ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 21-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
    Again, finding myself appreciating your support of my writes, hopingbto make the best of its endeavor, producing more comprehensive disclosure of views. Thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
Comment from beizanten
Excellent
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The first stanza is very well written, each paragraph rhyme well. A very good second stanza. A pretty good stanza. overall a well written poetry. You have done great, keep it up!

 Comment Written 21-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
    Trying, following your input, plus others, given writes are improving, thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
Comment from AdaJulie
Excellent
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Figure willing sides firm bone protecting,
stand alone firm an image holds justice,
cast darkness walls a form lone shadow.

The one them both see each work day,
stay between strong legs separate to age,
nearby them from a say be by their Dad.
Oh how I love these powerful stanzas!

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 16-Apr-2019
    I really appreciate this review, defining a soul joy in simple things, thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
Comment from James Upshaw
Needs Improvement
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This poem has some nice imagery. It has potentially, especially since it is free verse. However, it could use some real work in grammatical structure. I am a little lost with what you are saying.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 16-Apr-2019
    I do suffer in my conveyance, doing revisions to cut flaws, knowing limitation as any endeavor allempted by me. Thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
Comment from Earl Corp
Excellent
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I didn't understand the poem. I' wasn't able to glean competition from the words. The title gave me a competition vibe, but the body of the poem didn't. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2019


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2019
    Dispute statements appreciating your generous rate on this problem seemingly write, thanking you for your honest comments.
Comment from Pantygynt
Excellent
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THis is a strange poem all the more effective because the species that forms the subject of the poem is not mentione. My take is that this infant is not human. The thinks that go on around it acharacteristic of hhgerd animals while the subject tage refuge beneath the bulk of a parent. I have watched too much wild life TV to believe that this is anything other than a baby elephant.

The chaotic patterns of free vers are ideally suited to the apparently pointless milling around of the rest of the herd. A nice balance of form and content.

Then of course the whole thing could be a metaphor the human babe caught up in the world's rough and tumble.

 Comment Written 30-May-2015


reply by the author on 30-May-2015

    Love this review I do thank you and its states more and this detail is not about baby, but adults treated as a child
Comment from JourneyHolm
Excellent
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Very interesting poem. To be honest, it was pretty hard to understand. I had to read it a few times. For awhile, the imagery reminded me of a sapling trying to break free in a forest of elders. After merging with the overall tone, though, I really enjoyed the free flow of the emotion as the child desires to make a stand or name for him/herself. I enjoyed reading this and the challenge made it all the more desirable to finally get. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 29-May-2015


reply by the author on 30-May-2015

    A thought worth considering before any revision I thank you