Pantoum Collection
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Farewell"Poems written using the pantoum form
79 total reviews
Comment from michaelcahill
I read this several times. Wonderfully put. The repeating lines are such a plus in this piece. They come across fresh with a different meaning each time they are repeated. One of the best of these I have read. Wonderful, mikey
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
I read this several times. Wonderfully put. The repeating lines are such a plus in this piece. They come across fresh with a different meaning each time they are repeated. One of the best of these I have read. Wonderful, mikey
Comment Written 20-May-2014
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Thank you kind sir for a wonderful review and lavish spread of stars. I am blushing with your praise.
Comment from akulkumol
Beautiful thought and I loved your observation of nature's beauty and the way you expressed. Loved the most
Our stars are dancing on the sea tonight
Yet shudder at the sadness of farewell,
Alive in this blue hour of shifting light.
I watch the way they ride the rising swell
Thanks for sharing your beautiful thought.
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
Beautiful thought and I loved your observation of nature's beauty and the way you expressed. Loved the most
Our stars are dancing on the sea tonight
Yet shudder at the sadness of farewell,
Alive in this blue hour of shifting light.
I watch the way they ride the rising swell
Thanks for sharing your beautiful thought.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Thank you so much for this very kind review, Akulkumol.
Comment from Njorgensen
Beautiful and possesses a pillowy softness. It is quietly written with excellent rhyming and a smooth and easy flow that welcomes the reader to be a part of it.
Njorgensen
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
Beautiful and possesses a pillowy softness. It is quietly written with excellent rhyming and a smooth and easy flow that welcomes the reader to be a part of it.
Njorgensen
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Thank you so much for this very kind review, Njorgensen.
Comment from Alan K Pease
Lovely Pantoum sonnet consisting of three rhymed quatrains reflecting the parcels of light in the sea seen through the eyes and hearts of lovers.
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
Lovely Pantoum sonnet consisting of three rhymed quatrains reflecting the parcels of light in the sea seen through the eyes and hearts of lovers.
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Thank you so much for this very kind review, Alan.
Comment from ravenblack
Alive in the blue hour of shifting light- love that line, the blue hour that vague division between night and day when all is transitory just like the gradations of meaning in each iteration of your repeating lines. Reflections of stars or stars the dream of sparkling waters.
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
Alive in the blue hour of shifting light- love that line, the blue hour that vague division between night and day when all is transitory just like the gradations of meaning in each iteration of your repeating lines. Reflections of stars or stars the dream of sparkling waters.
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Many thanks, Ravenblack. Those moments of half-light at daybreak and dusk are amongst the best, so transitory and hard to capture.
Comment from MizKat
Hi Tony,
I really like your poem although I know nothing about writing Pantoum Sonnets. By reading your author notes I believe you did a really well job in writing it. I only write poetry from my heart.
MizKat
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
Hi Tony,
I really like your poem although I know nothing about writing Pantoum Sonnets. By reading your author notes I believe you did a really well job in writing it. I only write poetry from my heart.
MizKat
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Many thanks, MizKat, for taking the time to review. Much appreciated, as are your kind comments! Poetry from the heart is the best kind! Keep writing it!
Comment from maggieadams
You are the master of form and beauty of words. There are multiple, complex meanings in these lines as well as beauty in the words. A twin set, the reflection will end...I love how you parallel that thought with lovers who will some day be parted, but ride the wave of life, and one will be waiting ...beautiful.
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
You are the master of form and beauty of words. There are multiple, complex meanings in these lines as well as beauty in the words. A twin set, the reflection will end...I love how you parallel that thought with lovers who will some day be parted, but ride the wave of life, and one will be waiting ...beautiful.
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thank you, Maggie, for this lovely review of my poem - so much appreciated, as are the six stars bestowed upon it!
Comment from words
I appreciate your poignant write on farewell.
The sea imagery gave it a lovely flow.
Love the form of the pantoum ... its repeating lines suit your subject well.
Hugs, d
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
I appreciate your poignant write on farewell.
The sea imagery gave it a lovely flow.
Love the form of the pantoum ... its repeating lines suit your subject well.
Hugs, d
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Many thanks, d, for taking the time to review. Much appreciated, as are your kind comments!
Comment from 9999pool
farewells and goodbyes are never easy especially if it is the final goodbye.
We can only treasure the good memories after that final farewell, smiles.
The twins in the sky reminded us to hold fast to our dreams of the nostalgic past and to live again for today and tomorrow.
When the twins finally unite in the heavenly sky, we can once again rejoice to journey together.
Good write and best wishes to the contest.
Cheerio, Ritchie. :))
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
farewells and goodbyes are never easy especially if it is the final goodbye.
We can only treasure the good memories after that final farewell, smiles.
The twins in the sky reminded us to hold fast to our dreams of the nostalgic past and to live again for today and tomorrow.
When the twins finally unite in the heavenly sky, we can once again rejoice to journey together.
Good write and best wishes to the contest.
Cheerio, Ritchie. :))
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Many thanks, Ritchie, for taking the time to review. Much appreciated, as are your interesting comments!
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Welcome. Smiles.
Cheerio, Ritchie. :))
Comment from Ridley Williams
Hi Tony,
This is such a sensitive write of love. The texture you bring to the piece is wonderful. You develop a soft flow with your wording and presentation. I struggled a little with the continuity between the last line of the first quatrain, and the first line of the second, as that line seems to finish the thought of the first quatrain. Other than that I truly enjoyed the read...especially, the lines that read, "That span the empty loneliness of space, as we must surely do, my love and I, until we can again, at length, embrace." That was sweet! Nice job, and best of luck with this entry, Bill
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
Hi Tony,
This is such a sensitive write of love. The texture you bring to the piece is wonderful. You develop a soft flow with your wording and presentation. I struggled a little with the continuity between the last line of the first quatrain, and the first line of the second, as that line seems to finish the thought of the first quatrain. Other than that I truly enjoyed the read...especially, the lines that read, "That span the empty loneliness of space, as we must surely do, my love and I, until we can again, at length, embrace." That was sweet! Nice job, and best of luck with this entry, Bill
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Vey many thanks for your thoughtful review and comments, Bill, and for highlighting the part you liked best.
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Very many thanks for your thoughtful review and comments, Bill, and for highlighting the part you liked best.