Sorry I Missed You: Part I
A man plans a deadly surprise for his wife's birthday.22 total reviews
Comment from bayoupoet
This is a very well written and interesting story. I am looking forward to part two. will he go through with it?
I'll just have to wait and see! Well Done!
sandra
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
  |
This is a very well written and interesting story. I am looking forward to part two. will he go through with it?
I'll just have to wait and see! Well Done!
sandra
Comment Written 27-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
-
Thanks Sandra. But I suppose you will just have to press on to see?
Thanks again.
-
You are very welcome!
Comment from NicciFaye
Aww Dean. I couldn't get the who got shot, Ron or wife, both maybe. Where brains on the car seat, was the wife left to live and witness Ron death in front of her...oh you always have my imagination running like horses. I loved it. Great, great short story. I always love how you build it up, or you just give it to the reader raw.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
|
Aww Dean. I couldn't get the who got shot, Ron or wife, both maybe. Where brains on the car seat, was the wife left to live and witness Ron death in front of her...oh you always have my imagination running like horses. I loved it. Great, great short story. I always love how you build it up, or you just give it to the reader raw.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
-
Thanks Nicci. I always like your uplifting commentary. I really appreciate your readership!
Comment from Titanx9
You really got me with this one. The story is a page turner from beginning to end. I don't usually read Horror and Thriller genre, but I came by to read your work since you'd generously reviewed mines. I am delighted I did. Marlee had to be a bit touched in the head to cheat on someone like Sonny. You did an excellent job ramping up the suspense, especially having his wife and lover believing he was not aware of their trysts. I look forward to reading part 2.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
|
You really got me with this one. The story is a page turner from beginning to end. I don't usually read Horror and Thriller genre, but I came by to read your work since you'd generously reviewed mines. I am delighted I did. Marlee had to be a bit touched in the head to cheat on someone like Sonny. You did an excellent job ramping up the suspense, especially having his wife and lover believing he was not aware of their trysts. I look forward to reading part 2.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
-
Aww, don't read horror/thrillers on a regular basis Titanx9? That saddens me. However, I am happy you decided to give this one a shot (shameless pun intended there). Maybe you will look into reading more of the genre in the future now.
Thanks so much again!
Comment from vapros
Dean, you have skillfully established a treacherous situation, and a setting for a momentous event. Sonny intends to take a life or two today. He has fired as we leave him, but I imagine he has missed - firing a new weapon without first zeroing it in. Also, there is a real trick to shooting downhill, and I wonder if he is aware of it. Whatever, you created the scene well.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
|
Dean, you have skillfully established a treacherous situation, and a setting for a momentous event. Sonny intends to take a life or two today. He has fired as we leave him, but I imagine he has missed - firing a new weapon without first zeroing it in. Also, there is a real trick to shooting downhill, and I wonder if he is aware of it. Whatever, you created the scene well.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2013
-
You nailed it vapros. Having been a sniper in the Marine Corps, firing downrange on an elevated surface into a valley or ravine is much trickier than many people would believe it to be. As far as Sonny being aware of it? He was ARMY trained, so most probably not, lol.
Thanks again.
Comment from GratefullyRecovering
Wow! I normally don't last thru long stories lol, I've got really short attention span or something, maybe I'm just lazy or something? Anyway! I really like this, it kept my attention. You're really good at this stuff :) Wish I could write this well! <3 Awesome job!!!
Gonna read the other one too!!!!
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
 |
Wow! I normally don't last thru long stories lol, I've got really short attention span or something, maybe I'm just lazy or something? Anyway! I really like this, it kept my attention. You're really good at this stuff :) Wish I could write this well! <3 Awesome job!!!
Gonna read the other one too!!!!
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
-
Thanks so much GR. I always appreciate your thoughtful reviews. As I tell my readers, this type of fiction isn't for everyone. That's what makes us individuals.
Thanks again.
Comment from Jade Lawson
Hi, I just loved your story. Even though it is a bit long, it does not matter because it just kept me interested. I loved the simplicity of your words, your descriptions were also good, imagery excellent.
I consider this si a very interesting reading and the story in itself will captivate other readers.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
|
Hi, I just loved your story. Even though it is a bit long, it does not matter because it just kept me interested. I loved the simplicity of your words, your descriptions were also good, imagery excellent.
I consider this si a very interesting reading and the story in itself will captivate other readers.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
-
Thanks Angel. I really am glad that you liked it. I appreciate the time you invested in reading it and the kind commentary that accompanied your review.
-
You are very welcome, it was really a pleasure.
Comment from jppoet
THIS PROBABLY DESERVES A THREE. MUCH MUCH MUCH TOO LONG, ESPECIALLY IN THE CONTEXT OF INFIDELITY, THIS IS A DISAPPOINTMENT. YOU CAN --AND HAVE DONE--SO SUPREMELY BETTER THAN THIS -- LIKE YOUR FABULOUS FLY-OPEN MAYOR FOR WHICH I RATED YOU A RARE SIX-STARS.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
 |
THIS PROBABLY DESERVES A THREE. MUCH MUCH MUCH TOO LONG, ESPECIALLY IN THE CONTEXT OF INFIDELITY, THIS IS A DISAPPOINTMENT. YOU CAN --AND HAVE DONE--SO SUPREMELY BETTER THAN THIS -- LIKE YOUR FABULOUS FLY-OPEN MAYOR FOR WHICH I RATED YOU A RARE SIX-STARS.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
-
Thanks jppoet. I appreciate your sentiments and your review. I'm sorry you feel that harshly about it. I'll admit, it's probably not for everyone. But it has received excellent reviews from some pretty tough reviewers. I don't believe they would review it so out of mere sympathy, obligation or kindness. Everyone here understands what a disservice that would be to themselves as well as the writer.
I do thank you for your opinions, and they are duly noted.
Comment from mr elis
This reader was expecting a tragic ending but Sonny discovered nothing about his wife and her co-worker petty get together.The flat tire was a master piece written-with the exact timing .
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
|
This reader was expecting a tragic ending but Sonny discovered nothing about his wife and her co-worker petty get together.The flat tire was a master piece written-with the exact timing .
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
-
Thanks mr elis. I appreciate you reading Sorry I Missed You, as well as your kind review.
Comment from Janie King
This is very well-written and interesting. For me the piece was long...needed to be a couple of pieces. It could be because I have macular degeneration and long pieces are hard for me to read. Great job. God loves you and I do too.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
|
This is very well-written and interesting. For me the piece was long...needed to be a couple of pieces. It could be because I have macular degeneration and long pieces are hard for me to read. Great job. God loves you and I do too.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
-
Thanks Janie. I appreciate the read, review and the kind sentiment.
Comment from Righteous Riter
This is a classic story. Although this story is long, the writer keeps it interesting and transitions the story very well. The plot is good and interesting. The writer puts this story together nicely. Affairs, murder plots and missed shot attempts. Sorry I missed you. Perfect.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
|
This is a classic story. Although this story is long, the writer keeps it interesting and transitions the story very well. The plot is good and interesting. The writer puts this story together nicely. Affairs, murder plots and missed shot attempts. Sorry I missed you. Perfect.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2013
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2013
-
Thanks RR. I wanted to break it up some at first, I really did. But so many people see "BOOK" attached to a post and hit SKIP when it pops up. I broke up The Rhino Never Knocks into a book format and it has not received a single review since I did so. I felt/hoped this could carry itself along on it's own merits.
Thanks so much again. I really appreciate it.
