All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Beach Sleep"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
70 total reviews
Comment from Karl_Schembri
I love the rhythm and flow of this poem - you can feel the steep deep sinking into sleep as the sun and sand cajole you to go even deeper. Love the alliterations too!
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2012
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I love the rhythm and flow of this poem - you can feel the steep deep sinking into sleep as the sun and sand cajole you to go even deeper. Love the alliterations too!
Comment Written 01-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2012
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thx for sharing the snooze Karl! :) Sharyn
Comment from EMB
Okay. I'm officially jealous. LOL I'm in Florida, and my wife and visit a dear friend of ours in Hawaii from time to time, and the first thing I noticed is the absence of mosquitoes. (Except for when we visited a botany museum or something like that.)
So yeah, this poem was such a wonderful way of rubbing it in, sister! LOL
Nice one.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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Okay. I'm officially jealous. LOL I'm in Florida, and my wife and visit a dear friend of ours in Hawaii from time to time, and the first thing I noticed is the absence of mosquitoes. (Except for when we visited a botany museum or something like that.)
So yeah, this poem was such a wonderful way of rubbing it in, sister! LOL
Nice one.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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glad you enjoyed the snooze minus mozzies Ed - the trade wind carries them away, fortunately - unless you're down in a valley, which we're not ... :)
Comment from L K Pinaire
Nice work. I enjoyed this piece. It flowed smoothly and the imagery was very clear. Thanks for sharing. Best of luck to you.
Good writing,
Larry
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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Nice work. I enjoyed this piece. It flowed smoothly and the imagery was very clear. Thanks for sharing. Best of luck to you.
Good writing,
Larry
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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thx Larry! :) Sharyn
Comment from Mai Mai
This is an interesting piece. It reveals a sense of mystery as it leads us down a sun drenched beach, the sand being washed from our feet as the ocean gently washes away the grit. Such a sweet reminder at a trying time. Good work and good luck.
Mai Mai
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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This is an interesting piece. It reveals a sense of mystery as it leads us down a sun drenched beach, the sand being washed from our feet as the ocean gently washes away the grit. Such a sweet reminder at a trying time. Good work and good luck.
Mai Mai
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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thx Mai Mai ... glad you enjoyed it my dear! :) Sharyn
Comment from mermaids
I jsut savor your words. To be at the beach and just sleep in the sand with the sea close by. Foaming lullaby is a vivd description that captures well the waves and lure of the sea.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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I jsut savor your words. To be at the beach and just sleep in the sand with the sea close by. Foaming lullaby is a vivd description that captures well the waves and lure of the sea.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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aaah, with a name like yours, I'm preaching to the choir, hmm? :) Sharyn
Comment from ameen786
If you were trying to make the reader jealous....you win; my friend, beautiful imagery reflected in sweet vocabulary with superb alliteration and along with the picture a perfect presentation.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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If you were trying to make the reader jealous....you win; my friend, beautiful imagery reflected in sweet vocabulary with superb alliteration and along with the picture a perfect presentation.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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thx ameen ... plenty of room on my beach my dear ... :)
Comment from fictionwriter
I'd love to spend the afternoon with you. I've watched the leaves falling and wished I could slow this season to a crawl as I'm not looking forward to snow. Sigh. I'm jealous
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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I'd love to spend the afternoon with you. I've watched the leaves falling and wished I could slow this season to a crawl as I'm not looking forward to snow. Sigh. I'm jealous
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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I've never been a winter person I'm afraid - somehow I was lucky enough to end up in Hawaii, thank goodness! :)
Comment from uniqueauthor
I'm not overly enthused by the poetry form, but there is a subject matter and it works for me. I love island romance. I think the Tropics are some of Mother nature's most beautiful places.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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I'm not overly enthused by the poetry form, but there is a subject matter and it works for me. I love island romance. I think the Tropics are some of Mother nature's most beautiful places.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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some like free verse and for others it's an acquired taste my dear - I appreciate both free and formal - glad you enjoyed the snooze at the beach with me though! :) Sharyn
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I studied it. I guess I just like the conventional verse poetry. It doesn't always have to rhyme, but it does have to be a complete verse. Peace for today.
Comment from Curly Girly
Oh, this sounds and looks so nice. I wish I could be there NOW. I am so tired of being cold and dark. Gloomy, cold weather here today... This brings me cheer and hope in a dream... CG
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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Oh, this sounds and looks so nice. I wish I could be there NOW. I am so tired of being cold and dark. Gloomy, cold weather here today... This brings me cheer and hope in a dream... CG
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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I'm not a winter person CG - never have been - so I've always gravitated towards warm waters and tropics - somehow I was lucky enough to end up in the right place! :) Sharyn
Comment from Cornelius2000
Only someone living in Maui paradise could have written this poem. And, well, yes, of course they would also have to have awesome writing ability. I especially enjoyed the last "verse" alliteration. Fun poem.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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Only someone living in Maui paradise could have written this poem. And, well, yes, of course they would also have to have awesome writing ability. I especially enjoyed the last "verse" alliteration. Fun poem.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2012
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Glad you enjoyed this one, Dave. Every so often I have to slow down and remind myself where I live ... zzzzzzzzzz:) Sharyn