tanka (outside my door)
she is not yet ready to let go.15 total reviews
Comment from juliedickson55
Nicely done, your tanka poem...I like the premise that autumn is undressing, her finery dropping to the ground, like a lover preparing...the brillant gown of rd and gold tumbling to her feet, only then to be surrounded by the pale winter winter blanket.
good alliteration:
dressed December
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2012
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Nicely done, your tanka poem...I like the premise that autumn is undressing, her finery dropping to the ground, like a lover preparing...the brillant gown of rd and gold tumbling to her feet, only then to be surrounded by the pale winter winter blanket.
good alliteration:
dressed December
Comment Written 21-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2012
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Nice poetic review. like the phrase pale winter blanket.
Comment from Jacqueline1616
So very beautiful, again saying much in a very few words.
outside my door
dressed in December
winter lurks
unaware that autumn
is not quite undressed. (I really love this last line)
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2012
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So very beautiful, again saying much in a very few words.
outside my door
dressed in December
winter lurks
unaware that autumn
is not quite undressed. (I really love this last line)
Comment Written 21-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2012
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Thank you for reviewing. Mu favorite line also.
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YES...it sounds so true...Autumn isnt done yet...hold on a minute!!
Comment from Spiritual Echo
Inside my heart
Before the spring thaw
I'll think of you
and remember
When we were both young
Guess there's no poetic formula, ingrid
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2012
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Inside my heart
Before the spring thaw
I'll think of you
and remember
When we were both young
Guess there's no poetic formula, ingrid
Comment Written 21-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2012
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Hay, I like that hope you are entering it.
Comment from 4tulips
I enjoyed reading your poem about how Decembers weather is lurking out your door and it is not officially sprung at us yet. I can relate to you your description of such weather. Autumn is not ready to let go yet and disappear, yet as soon as we step outside it's cold. Enjoyed your poem using the tanks style. Thank you for sharing it.
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reply by the author on 20-Oct-2012
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I enjoyed reading your poem about how Decembers weather is lurking out your door and it is not officially sprung at us yet. I can relate to you your description of such weather. Autumn is not ready to let go yet and disappear, yet as soon as we step outside it's cold. Enjoyed your poem using the tanks style. Thank you for sharing it.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2012
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Thank you for reviewing. Leaves are dropping fast but there are still some clinging.
Comment from Connie P
I like this very much. The form is on track and you have the perfect portrayal of the overlapping of seasons. Nice job.
Connie
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reply by the author on 20-Oct-2012
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I like this very much. The form is on track and you have the perfect portrayal of the overlapping of seasons. Nice job.
Connie
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2012
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Thanks for reading and reviewing.
