Contest Entry and Winners
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Lonely Little Lilly"Short Stories
41 total reviews
Comment from Amfunny
I enjoyed this....whatever it is. I don't know about these forms so I can't tell you. But I did enjoy it, especially the little poem. Well done, my friend. Cute story.
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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I enjoyed this....whatever it is. I don't know about these forms so I can't tell you. But I did enjoy it, especially the little poem. Well done, my friend. Cute story.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Amfunny,
I just jumped in and gave it a shot...so far so good. Glad you enjoyed it. Smiles, CArol
Comment from MizKat
Begin Again - I've always loved using words that start with the same letter, although I didn't know what it was called until recently. I love your story and, in my opinion, I think you used aliteration to perfection. Bravo!!! Kat
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Begin Again - I've always loved using words that start with the same letter, although I didn't know what it was called until recently. I love your story and, in my opinion, I think you used aliteration to perfection. Bravo!!! Kat
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Kat,
This was my first attempt so I am pleased that so many are enjoying it. Thank you very much. Smiles,Carol
Comment from hotstuff
This is a sweet childlike story that would appeal to children. It also seems to follow the rules set by the competition in my opinion as you have used alliteration many times starting with your first sentence and ending with your last. Good luck.
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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This is a sweet childlike story that would appeal to children. It also seems to follow the rules set by the competition in my opinion as you have used alliteration many times starting with your first sentence and ending with your last. Good luck.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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hotstuff,
Thanks for the kind review and comments. I appreciate your thoughts. Smiles, CArol
Comment from amada
I like alliterations so I was searching for them as a detective with a magnifient glass. I found very good ones, "fretting, fussing, and fuming," "sluggish snail sat sunbathing on a shiny." Geat job!
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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I like alliterations so I was searching for them as a detective with a magnifient glass. I found very good ones, "fretting, fussing, and fuming," "sluggish snail sat sunbathing on a shiny." Geat job!
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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amada,
Thank you so much for enjoying my first attempt at alliterations. I appreciate the comments. Smiles, Carol
Comment from sugardog
This is one of the sweetest little alliterative stories I have ever read! I think you did exactly what the contest called for. Very creative and fun-this would be a great published children's story :) It made me smile. Nicely done! You are a very versatile writer- Dana
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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This is one of the sweetest little alliterative stories I have ever read! I think you did exactly what the contest called for. Very creative and fun-this would be a great published children's story :) It made me smile. Nicely done! You are a very versatile writer- Dana
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Dana,
Thank you very much for enjoying the story and for the very generous and kind comments. Smiles to you, Carol
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You're very welcome!
Comment from sgalletti
I absolutely LOVED this piece Carol. It's exactly what needs to be done when writing a story filled with alliteration. Plus, it's a fun story to boot. This will be a very difficult piece to beat. It's terrific. Did you have as much fun writing it as I did reading it? Sue
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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I absolutely LOVED this piece Carol. It's exactly what needs to be done when writing a story filled with alliteration. Plus, it's a fun story to boot. This will be a very difficult piece to beat. It's terrific. Did you have as much fun writing it as I did reading it? Sue
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Sue,
Awesome...my head has been pounding me to death so I wasn't sure I had done it right and it's awesome to have you (the expert) comment so generously on mine. Thank you...Smiles, Carol
Comment from Tellis
I don't know if it is what the contest calls for but I thought it was great. My daughter would have loved me to read this to her before bed when she was little. I think you should try and get this one published.
Tellis
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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I don't know if it is what the contest calls for but I thought it was great. My daughter would have loved me to read this to her before bed when she was little. I think you should try and get this one published.
Tellis
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Tellis,
What an awesome comment...I wasn't sure if I was doing it right but it seemed like fun so It's even better when others enjoyed it too. Smiles, CArol
Comment from closetpoetjester
I emphatically enjoyed your tell all tale of Little Lilly! Cheers for the great read and I think the aliteration added a extra nice descriptive touch to your writing. An excellent read and you are quite deserving of your rank... sincerely cpj
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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I emphatically enjoyed your tell all tale of Little Lilly! Cheers for the great read and I think the aliteration added a extra nice descriptive touch to your writing. An excellent read and you are quite deserving of your rank... sincerely cpj
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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cpj,
I'm deeply flattered by your comments and I am thrilled you enjoyed the story. Smiles, CArol
Comment from Phil Kitom
Wonderful, well written story, following faithfully,
fanstory creators certain criteria.
Carol can certainly write worthy works producing
perfectly powerful words with will...
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Wonderful, well written story, following faithfully,
fanstory creators certain criteria.
Carol can certainly write worthy works producing
perfectly powerful words with will...
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Phil,
Thank you for cleverly using your alliteration to compliment my work...You always boost my self esteem whenever I hear from you. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sharesy
on top [of] the fence
as the car careened out of sight. - this made me smile. How fast was the dad driving?
This was a very cute story. The thing is, if the picture is any indication, isn't Lilly a little young to write? she looks about four.
I liked the song her mom sang.
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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on top [of] the fence
as the car careened out of sight. - this made me smile. How fast was the dad driving?
This was a very cute story. The thing is, if the picture is any indication, isn't Lilly a little young to write? she looks about four.
I liked the song her mom sang.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
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Sharesy,
Thank you so much for the assistance and comments. I appreciate it as always. Smiles, CArol