Spirited Justice
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Spirited Justice Chap 7"Mystery, crime and ghostly high jinks
18 total reviews
Comment from BOO ghost
BOO is reading prose...The elevator slowed to a halt before Eleanor could ask anything further, and the doors opened. Matthew stepped out, flanked by two ghosts -- one he could see and one he could feel. Two ghosts on the case. Do they get paid overtime?
Sophia, Max, and Hilda had been amongst the first to arrive. Their faces were pale with shock. Murmurs and gasps spread through the growing crowd gathered around the motionless body. Well. Another murder. All because of a pageant-- a torn piece of fabric, barely visible in the shadows. Oh, this torn piece of fabric is the smoking gun?
Another splendid episode, count your doubloon.
BOO!
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
BOO is reading prose...The elevator slowed to a halt before Eleanor could ask anything further, and the doors opened. Matthew stepped out, flanked by two ghosts -- one he could see and one he could feel. Two ghosts on the case. Do they get paid overtime?
Sophia, Max, and Hilda had been amongst the first to arrive. Their faces were pale with shock. Murmurs and gasps spread through the growing crowd gathered around the motionless body. Well. Another murder. All because of a pageant-- a torn piece of fabric, barely visible in the shadows. Oh, this torn piece of fabric is the smoking gun?
Another splendid episode, count your doubloon.
BOO!
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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Hello Boo! I can't believe you blessed me once again with your wonderful stars and a review. How awesome you are! I'm thrilled you are enjoying the story. Thank you ever so much.
Smiles, Carol
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BOO is the transparent third ghost!
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Comment from BethShelby
It seems the murders or attmpted murders are continuing. I guess the works out good to have the qhosts are to pass through walls and floata up the ceiling to see what clues might be up there might be. So far I don't know a motive.
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
It seems the murders or attmpted murders are continuing. I guess the works out good to have the qhosts are to pass through walls and floata up the ceiling to see what clues might be up there might be. So far I don't know a motive.
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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You shouldn't figure it out yet or I wouldn't be doing my job of keeping you in the dark. Only breadcrumbs for now. LOL Thanks for the read and the review. Appreciate it very much.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sally Law
Great chapter, my friend! I see you fixed the errors straight away and now it reads so smoothly. Now we have an attempted murder added to the roux. I wonder if it was imtemded for someone else than the stagehand or if it was just a message. Staying on.
Sending you my best today as always.
Sal Xoxo's
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
Great chapter, my friend! I see you fixed the errors straight away and now it reads so smoothly. Now we have an attempted murder added to the roux. I wonder if it was imtemded for someone else than the stagehand or if it was just a message. Staying on.
Sending you my best today as always.
Sal Xoxo's
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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Since they appeared to be about to kidnap Sophia and Hilda, too, maybe someone set it up as a diversion, or maybe not. I've got to keep you guessing. Thanks, Sally, for the lovely review and the sixes. I can't seem to get the commas and periods in the right place, no matter how often I send them through an editor. To be honest, half the time, I can't see which one I used. They look the same. But then you would know a lot about that stuff. I appreciate the stars so much.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
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Most welcome. It takes me 30-40 hours to write one book chapter. FanStory edit is a pain in the ass.
Just sayin'.
Sal :)) xoxo
Comment from barbara.wilkey
The story line is really good, but with these errors I can't in good conscience give it six stars, sorry. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Danny giggled, "Ever heard of knocking before entering a room?" (Danni??? & giggled.)
The young man smiled at the girls, his voice smooth and reassuring. "It's okay now. He's gone."
Hilda looked up at Eleanor. "Johan saved us. Some man followed us to Sophia's hideout and tried to kidnap us." (Two dialogues in one paragraph. & reassuring,)
Eleanor smiled, "Thank you, Johan, for rescuing the girls." (smiled.)
Donatelli moved away from the scene before answering Danni. "You find something?" (Danni,)
The detective smiled, "Good work, Danni." (smiled.)
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
The story line is really good, but with these errors I can't in good conscience give it six stars, sorry. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Danny giggled, "Ever heard of knocking before entering a room?" (Danni??? & giggled.)
The young man smiled at the girls, his voice smooth and reassuring. "It's okay now. He's gone."
Hilda looked up at Eleanor. "Johan saved us. Some man followed us to Sophia's hideout and tried to kidnap us." (Two dialogues in one paragraph. & reassuring,)
Eleanor smiled, "Thank you, Johan, for rescuing the girls." (smiled.)
Donatelli moved away from the scene before answering Danni. "You find something?" (Danni,)
The detective smiled, "Good work, Danni." (smiled.)
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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Sorry about the errors. I'll check them out, but I don't understand why my editors (on the comp[uter) do't catch these things or tell me differently. I trust you...but it angers me. I'm off to make the changes. And thank you for catching them.
Smiles, Carol
Every last comma and period corrected and spaces added. Thank you again!
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I've noticed in my own writing it the computer doesn't catch everything. I have no clue why. It doesn't make sense.
Comment from Lindsey Russell
I love this story. I'm not usually one for mystery fiction but since beginning to read your work I've been hooked! Nice job and happy writing! I'll be on the lookout for further installments.
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
I love this story. I'm not usually one for mystery fiction but since beginning to read your work I've been hooked! Nice job and happy writing! I'll be on the lookout for further installments.
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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Thank you so much for reading and for saying my stories have hooked you into following. I am honored. What a blessing to find a new reader who enjoys what I write.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I love Max, I love dogs! It was lucky he was able to find Sophia, being blind, she'd have had a problem getting away. I reckon the 'accident' and the 'murder' are connected. But at least Danni has found some clues. We need to find someone with a tear in his/her clothes. This was another wonderful chapter, with Eleanor and Danni 'helping' Donatelli. Lol, doen't he love them!!! Well done, my friend. I'm already looking for the next chapter. Love and hugs, Sandra xxxxx
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
I love Max, I love dogs! It was lucky he was able to find Sophia, being blind, she'd have had a problem getting away. I reckon the 'accident' and the 'murder' are connected. But at least Danni has found some clues. We need to find someone with a tear in his/her clothes. This was another wonderful chapter, with Eleanor and Danni 'helping' Donatelli. Lol, doen't he love them!!! Well done, my friend. I'm already looking for the next chapter. Love and hugs, Sandra xxxxx
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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Sandra, my dear...You are always so good to me. I am glad that you enjoyed this one...I had a struggle trying to keep it happy with the ghosts...but life was getting in my way. It was Mike's 5th anniversary and it knocked the socks off me. But I know all will be well again. So I finished it up this morning and hoped it would pass. Glad you liked it.
Just wrote a short and posted...It started as a romance for the 100 word contest and turned into something totally different.... so no contest for it. LOL
Sending my love, Carol
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
I could never write mysteries. I don't know how you manage to remember it all and how you add in the clues early for later discovery. It is all very complicated to me....which is why I write limericks, I suppose lol Fun chapter.
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reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
I could never write mysteries. I don't know how you manage to remember it all and how you add in the clues early for later discovery. It is all very complicated to me....which is why I write limericks, I suppose lol Fun chapter.
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Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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And I couldn't write a limerick or a poem that anyone would think worthwhile. We each have what we are good at... I'm happy that mine is mysteries and really happy that yours are the limeriks....my daily dose of laughter.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Jacob1395
I thought you did another excellent job with the action and dialogue in this chapter which kept me really engaged as I was reading it. I could feel the sense of relief towards the end as well following the rescue of the girls. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
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reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
I thought you did another excellent job with the action and dialogue in this chapter which kept me really engaged as I was reading it. I could feel the sense of relief towards the end as well following the rescue of the girls. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2024
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Thanks Jacob! I really appreciate knowing how the reader feels as they read and what holds their attention. Thank you for reading and offering your comments.
Smiles, Carol