Comment from SimianSavant

Excellent

[rating revised up after edits made by author]
I am confused by what you did vs. what this was supposed to be, according to your notes

aabbcbcbbaaa (rules)
aabbcbdbbaa (yours)

Firstly, I'm confused that the rules supposedly say 11 lines, yet there are 12 letters instead of 11.

Secondly, I'm confused why you have a D rhyme, when they should only go up to C, according to your notes. Can you clarify, and adjust your piece to meet whatever the rules are?

🦍

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024

I thank you for pointing out the errors. I understand the loss of the star. I will check it out and make the changes.
Joan

reply by SimianSavant on 31-Aug-2024

I saw you adjusted the rhyming schematic, and have adjusted up the rating. 🦍

reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024

Thanks for looking back at it. I appreciate the extra star.
Joan

Comment from jake cosmos aller

Excellent

interesting poetic form. I like this stanza best

Political machinations are not chi
They're taking over- causing a sea
Of vileness we hate
Moving toward date
Of our new
Fate

what does chi mean anyway? would be worth a note in the author's note

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024

Hi Jake,
Thanks for reading and reviewing this. I use Chi means calming.
Joan

Comment from Begin Again

Excellent

We live in a country where education is applauded, where standing up for your country is called respect, and where drive and determination to be the best you can is considered being the cream of the crop.....but when it comes to politicians...people who are in charge of our lives and our country...we fail and fail bi time! You said it all!
Smiles, Carol

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024

Thanks for reading and reviewing, Carol. I appreciate both very much.
Joan

Comment from Patty Mazzurco

Excellent

I have never heard of this form. I'm going to try one :)

really liked how you captured the chaos in politics here! The way you repeat ... Political machinations are not chi ... gives a strong feeling of frustration. The lines about ... vileness ... and the ... race for the title ... really show the competition and messiness. I also enjoyed the bit where you mention hoping both candidates would vacate--it adds a personal touch. The rhythm and rhyme work really well, too. Definitely on my list to try.

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024

Hi Patty,
I appreciate the thorough repose and am glad you enjoyed. Thanks.
Joan

Comment from gansach

Excellent

Another new style of poetry for me to learn about. I followed along with the rules as I read your poem to get the feel of it and you fulfilled them nicely. Great rhyming and construct. Nice entry for your club event. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024

Thanks tor the thorough and encouraging review, Gail.
Joan

Comment from Cindy Decker 3

Excellent

Joan,
I like your poem, and like learning a new word.. chi.
I think everyone is nervous about November's outcome.
I still hope the dems. turn things around, but in the world of politics that might be a tall order.
Excellent poem, Joan.
Best wishes,
Cindy

 Comment Written 26-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 26-Jul-2024

Thanks, Cindy, for reading and reviewing my poem. I appreciate it.
I agree with you on both points.
Joan

Comment from AP Apgar

Excellent

What an excellent poem and picture presentation supporting- your poem is well written- being careful- not to disagree with power the brokers doing harm- well written- Alan

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 25-Jul-2024

Thanks for your continuing support, Alan.
Joan

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

a great andaree for the election times right now...
(especially after i googled "chi" lol - you may want to put the meaning in your notes)
anyway, good, thought-provoking poem!
thank you for sharing
shelley :)

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2024

Thanks, Shelley, for the nice review and generous rating.
Joan

Comment from Pearl Edwards

Excellent

I don't envy you for the politics going on in your country, and now another change. P olitics is definitely not chi, I quite agree Joan, and you've shown it well in your andaree poem for this week's challenge. Well done,
cheers,
valda '

 Comment Written 22-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2024

Thanks for your kind comments and for all the stars, Valda.
Joan

Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill

Excellent

Well done. Navigating through the Packing dox maze is bothersome. I will be at this for a while. At least, the actual move is finished. Now, I painstakingly have to go through every single box. I have to donate even more stuff. While it gives me joy to help others out,
It still is like a knife through the heart at times. While some might say that the rocking chair that takes up so much space in the room needs to go, what I see is a chair I fed my babies in. It is crammed with memories. But, life goes on while you are making other plans. My writing and reviewing will be spotty untill I finish. Karen

 Comment Written 22-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 22-Jul-2024

Hi Karen,
Thanks for taking time to read and review this during your move.
Hope the unpacking takes less time than the packing and you settle in quickly. I still have the rocker I nursed by children in too.
Joan