Zen & The Art Of Feeding Geese
Thank you, FS, for 500 posts!24 total reviews
Comment from Sharon Elwell
This piece is lovely and thought-provoking. I had a few questions. In the sentence "...special music CeCe told me about..." I wondered what the music was and why it was special. It took me off-track a little.
When the protagonist says he was rubbing his fellow musicians the wrong way, I wondered what specifically he was doing to have that effect.
There were a couple of trouble spots with verb tense. "It is overcast...the birds were not singing." "I hadn't shown up for a gig...the guys have given up on me." It seems those verbs should be in agreement.
I hope this helps. I'm heading to the park to look for some geese!
This piece is lovely and thought-provoking. I had a few questions. In the sentence "...special music CeCe told me about..." I wondered what the music was and why it was special. It took me off-track a little.
When the protagonist says he was rubbing his fellow musicians the wrong way, I wondered what specifically he was doing to have that effect.
There were a couple of trouble spots with verb tense. "It is overcast...the birds were not singing." "I hadn't shown up for a gig...the guys have given up on me." It seems those verbs should be in agreement.
I hope this helps. I'm heading to the park to look for some geese!
Comment Written 27-May-2024
Comment from Teri7
Jim, This is a really great story about the man feeding the geese. I love this song by Avalon. Thank you for sharing this with us. A blessing for me today! May God bless you abundantly! Teri
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
Jim, This is a really great story about the man feeding the geese. I love this song by Avalon. Thank you for sharing this with us. A blessing for me today! May God bless you abundantly! Teri
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
Thank you! I am proud and humbled to be a blessing.
Comment from nomi338
A life lived without purpose is a life being wasted. Yes God does feed the plants , the animals, the bugs, fish and the birds. Some of these life forms provide food to other life forms. Not only can man assist in the feeding of these life forms, man can also by his foolish actions deny food to the life forms. We must acknowledge our place in the food chain and not interfere so that those who need to be fed will be in turn be fed.
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
A life lived without purpose is a life being wasted. Yes God does feed the plants , the animals, the bugs, fish and the birds. Some of these life forms provide food to other life forms. Not only can man assist in the feeding of these life forms, man can also by his foolish actions deny food to the life forms. We must acknowledge our place in the food chain and not interfere so that those who need to be fed will be in turn be fed.
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
Your message came on a day when I was reprimanded for feeding geese too close to a walk where they might dirty it.
Comment from Debi Pick Marquette
Jim, I love this. Your story is beautiful and meaningful and gave me a sense of peacefulness while reading. I am so backed up on promised sixes for the anniversary book or you would have one. Please accept my virtual six for this beautiful story. And congrats on your 500th post and what a way to do it, on such a lovely piece. Actually, considering I lived the last part and thought it to be so relaxing, consider it a virtual ten. A little gift from Lucinda and me.
Love Debi
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
Jim, I love this. Your story is beautiful and meaningful and gave me a sense of peacefulness while reading. I am so backed up on promised sixes for the anniversary book or you would have one. Please accept my virtual six for this beautiful story. And congrats on your 500th post and what a way to do it, on such a lovely piece. Actually, considering I lived the last part and thought it to be so relaxing, consider it a virtual ten. A little gift from Lucinda and me.
Love Debi
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
I'm so thankful! Your words mean much to me and I'm grateful for them.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Congrats on your 500th post, Jim, and what a wonderful post with which to mark it! You tell a story which must be so relatable to many, old or young. It's all about a purpose in life which doesn't have to be performing, being a celebrity or even simply being a 'doing' person fulfilling a bucket list. We're pretty insignificant in the great scheme of things, a 'vessel' for achieving good and kindness but not so enamoured with ourselves that we lose sight of our purpose and others around us. The musician is a great image for this, fuelled by adrenaline, forever fearful that the magic will be lost, as it undoubtedly will be, if he doesn't focus on more spiritual aspirations. Nature is around us all the time, speaking to us and inspiring us. Your fine story, Jim, written from the heart and conveying your message in excellent dialogue is a meditative pleasure to read. Even if it crossed over into another religion with your reference to 'zen' would that be so bad as we all have our own beliefs and journeys to pursue? Well done, Jim. Take care Debbie
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
Congrats on your 500th post, Jim, and what a wonderful post with which to mark it! You tell a story which must be so relatable to many, old or young. It's all about a purpose in life which doesn't have to be performing, being a celebrity or even simply being a 'doing' person fulfilling a bucket list. We're pretty insignificant in the great scheme of things, a 'vessel' for achieving good and kindness but not so enamoured with ourselves that we lose sight of our purpose and others around us. The musician is a great image for this, fuelled by adrenaline, forever fearful that the magic will be lost, as it undoubtedly will be, if he doesn't focus on more spiritual aspirations. Nature is around us all the time, speaking to us and inspiring us. Your fine story, Jim, written from the heart and conveying your message in excellent dialogue is a meditative pleasure to read. Even if it crossed over into another religion with your reference to 'zen' would that be so bad as we all have our own beliefs and journeys to pursue? Well done, Jim. Take care Debbie
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
I am grateful for your very kind words.
Comment from Michele Harber
First of all, congratulations on reaching your 500-post milestone! I know you've been gunning for it, and I'm so happy you finally reached it.
I'm even more happy that you reached it with such a moving piece, that managed to tell two stories. The first is of a selfish and self-centered man who let his relationship slide because fame, adulation and self-adulation were more important.
The second is of the old man, who'd shared a similar past, but recognized a higher and more important purpose, and one that every man or woman could pursue and achieve. I love your use of the line, "He knows the tiniest sparrow, and feeds and cares for him," which so clearly stresses the point that all creatures are equal, and no one person can be above the rest. The best part of the story is that the formerly callous man took the message to heart, proving that every one of us is capable of doing so as well. Excellent job!
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
First of all, congratulations on reaching your 500-post milestone! I know you've been gunning for it, and I'm so happy you finally reached it.
I'm even more happy that you reached it with such a moving piece, that managed to tell two stories. The first is of a selfish and self-centered man who let his relationship slide because fame, adulation and self-adulation were more important.
The second is of the old man, who'd shared a similar past, but recognized a higher and more important purpose, and one that every man or woman could pursue and achieve. I love your use of the line, "He knows the tiniest sparrow, and feeds and cares for him," which so clearly stresses the point that all creatures are equal, and no one person can be above the rest. The best part of the story is that the formerly callous man took the message to heart, proving that every one of us is capable of doing so as well. Excellent job!
Comment Written 26-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
Your words reach my heart! Thanks so much! I prayed that The Lord would give me inspiration for the milestone. I tried to do short stories for each of the milestones.
-
I'm glad He answered your prayer. Now please set another milestone to reach, because I want you around for a long time to come!
-
Now, my goal is 750 (and beyond, I hope!)
-
I do too!
-
I'm going to look forward to all of your work!
-
Uh oh, then I'm going to have to start posting more, aren't I?
-
That will be a pleasure for me, and I'm certain many others.
-
Awww...that's so sweet!
Comment from Julie Helms
Jim, this is a beautiful story. A man lost in a depressing state of nothingness (reminds of Ecclesiastes--everything is vanity), having a tiny but life-changing encounter. Very well written. You had me hooked to the end!
Canadian geese.
(Canada geese, Quick change it before a Canadian sees it. They get super touchy about it!)
Really well done!
Julie
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
Jim, this is a beautiful story. A man lost in a depressing state of nothingness (reminds of Ecclesiastes--everything is vanity), having a tiny but life-changing encounter. Very well written. You had me hooked to the end!
Canadian geese.
(Canada geese, Quick change it before a Canadian sees it. They get super touchy about it!)
Really well done!
Julie
Comment Written 26-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
I changed it to Canada. Thanks!
-
:-)
Comment from LJbutterfly
This is a compelling story describing the inner thoughts and feelings of a man in search of himself. I enjoyed the realistic dialogue between the protagonist and an old man who understood his own God=given purpose. This story is well thought out and well written. Congratulation on 500 posts.
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
This is a compelling story describing the inner thoughts and feelings of a man in search of himself. I enjoyed the realistic dialogue between the protagonist and an old man who understood his own God=given purpose. This story is well thought out and well written. Congratulation on 500 posts.
Comment Written 26-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
Many gracious thanks to you,
Comment from BethShelby
This is really good story Jim. It it special since it is your 500th post. They ought to award us something special for the posts. I will soon have 1000. I can't believe I've posted so many.
This is really good story Jim. It it special since it is your 500th post. They ought to award us something special for the posts. I will soon have 1000. I can't believe I've posted so many.
Comment Written 26-May-2024
Comment from lyenochka
This feels like a Christian answer to existentialism. I can't help but wonder if you were in the entertainment business in your previous line of work because that's a theme that keeps coming up. I'm glad that narrator found fulfillment in doing God's calling.
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
This feels like a Christian answer to existentialism. I can't help but wonder if you were in the entertainment business in your previous line of work because that's a theme that keeps coming up. I'm glad that narrator found fulfillment in doing God's calling.
Comment Written 26-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
-
My friend and I used to call ourselves a comedy team, but we never went anywhere. I headed the Bridgeport Chapter of the Sons Of The Desert which was a Laurel and Hardy Fan Club. We held a world convention in Hollywood in 1980 where I intermingled with many celebs. I also put out a newsletter, "The Pullet Surprise". I named one of my posts after it.