The Unwilling Heir
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "The Unwilling Heir - Chap 21"A Mysterious Inheritance and Murders
15 total reviews
Comment from Esther Brown
Carol, what a lovely development! I am liking Esther more and more. Now I am wondering what Esther needs to reclaim. Her love? The treasure? Personal redemption? You use dialog to show feelings and action to move things along without a single hiccup. Esther
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
  |
Carol, what a lovely development! I am liking Esther more and more. Now I am wondering what Esther needs to reclaim. Her love? The treasure? Personal redemption? You use dialog to show feelings and action to move things along without a single hiccup. Esther
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
-
Wish and you shall receive...try the next chapter and you should get the answers you are looking for. Thank you so much for the lovely review and the the stars.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from BethShelby
This is strange to have these ghost acting like normal people in a way. It is hard to comment on the nature of a ghost when you believe that only exist in stories. I don't how some that you can see thought and aren't able to touch could drink tea without taking on a human from. it would seem like tea would pour right through them. I get hung up on the silliest. I should just go with it as it is written and enjoy if for what it is. Really good writing.
reply by the author on 16-May-2024
 |
This is strange to have these ghost acting like normal people in a way. It is hard to comment on the nature of a ghost when you believe that only exist in stories. I don't how some that you can see thought and aren't able to touch could drink tea without taking on a human from. it would seem like tea would pour right through them. I get hung up on the silliest. I should just go with it as it is written and enjoy if for what it is. Really good writing.
Comment Written 16-May-2024
reply by the author on 16-May-2024
-
Here is how I look at it...once they take on the human form, they act and do as humans do, but still have the capacity to disappear at will. Don't ask me if that's correct or not, because I don't know. It's just how my brain is writing it...I know nothing about ghosts and the story found a life of its own and I am just along fo the ride. If you have suggestions as how to write it another way...I am all ears. LOL Thanks for the thoughts and the review.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from LJbutterfly
The pace of this chapter activated my imagination as your detailed descriptions of the emotions, fears and desires of two women was delicately portrayed in a way that allowed me to understand and feel what the women felt. Both women longed for companionship and found it in each other when they realized they both led morally disreputable lives. This chapter makes you want to root for both women.
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
|
The pace of this chapter activated my imagination as your detailed descriptions of the emotions, fears and desires of two women was delicately portrayed in a way that allowed me to understand and feel what the women felt. Both women longed for companionship and found it in each other when they realized they both led morally disreputable lives. This chapter makes you want to root for both women.
Comment Written 16-May-2024
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
-
Hurrah! That's the emotion I was looking for...I can't write a story all about doom and gloom. I think you might like the next one as well. I am flattered by your review and the awesome stars. Thank you so much.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from karenina
I'm out of sixes... (It's Wednesday after all)--
Carol, this chapter truly captured my heart. If there is a way spirits can communicate, I'd want it to be just like this...
A gentle camaraderie, some empathy, a tenuous trust that blossoms...
Every paragraph was stellar. I suddenly have nothing but warm feelings for Madeline...and Esther seems an angel in waiting!
Karenina
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 16-May-2024
|
I'm out of sixes... (It's Wednesday after all)--
Carol, this chapter truly captured my heart. If there is a way spirits can communicate, I'd want it to be just like this...
A gentle camaraderie, some empathy, a tenuous trust that blossoms...
Every paragraph was stellar. I suddenly have nothing but warm feelings for Madeline...and Esther seems an angel in waiting!
Karenina
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-May-2024
reply by the author on 16-May-2024
-
Me too! I felt the connection between Esther and Madeline. The thought came to me after I had communicated with you. I never feel like I am being judged by you (many others I do), and that's exactly how I wanted the two women to be. They both knew they'd led an imperfect life and lost in love, but they wanted to be a better person. I think you will learn to like both of them as the story unfolds. I finally wrote a quick outline of how it will develop..that rarely happens. I know where its headed and kind of how its going to get there. Wish me luck!
Smiles, Carol
-
Oh, wow. You could not have said a nicer thing to me if you tried! Thank you for this, Carol. I feel the same way with you!
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Your writing is excellent. I was drawn into the world you've created with excellent descriptions and rich character development. The way you bring Esther and Madeline to life is terrific. I found myself deeply invested in their stories. I was also rooting for their friendship to blossom!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 16-May-2024
|
Your writing is excellent. I was drawn into the world you've created with excellent descriptions and rich character development. The way you bring Esther and Madeline to life is terrific. I found myself deeply invested in their stories. I was also rooting for their friendship to blossom!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-May-2024
reply by the author on 16-May-2024
-
Thank you Michael. I'm not normally a writer of ghost stories but I like this one because I can mix the unknown with reality and make it more personalized instead of all creepy crawling things. I am thrilled you were rooting for their friendship because I think it will play an important part in the story as it unfolds. Thank you!
Smiles, Carol