Driven
A free verse love poem33 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Experts reckon that love and connection with a lover is not just about sight and attraction, but also about smell too. Your poem is all about a physical connection here, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Experts reckon that love and connection with a lover is not just about sight and attraction, but also about smell too. Your poem is all about a physical connection here, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 09-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Dolly! Your new photo is beautiful! Xoxo
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Thank you Jessica x
Comment from John Ciarmello
You wouldn't understand this unless you've felt true love.
There are so many beautifully memorable phrases in this poem that are unique to the totality of love, and I began doubting my feeling of love.
The sensory images are so engaging, Jess. Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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You wouldn't understand this unless you've felt true love.
There are so many beautifully memorable phrases in this poem that are unique to the totality of love, and I began doubting my feeling of love.
The sensory images are so engaging, Jess. Best, JohnC
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, John! Truly appreciated!
Xo
Jess
Comment from Mintybee
You use compelling and exciting imagery with lots of motion and strong word choice. This is exactly the right length to convey what you mean, not letting the pacing slow for a moment. This is a great free verse poem.
Mintybee
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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You use compelling and exciting imagery with lots of motion and strong word choice. This is exactly the right length to convey what you mean, not letting the pacing slow for a moment. This is a great free verse poem.
Mintybee
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Mintybee! That means the world to me! Xoxo
Comment from Jim Wile
This was really good, Jess. I loved the car metaphor you used throughout. It's a great one to express the excitement and forward motion of your love.
The only thing that bothered me a little was the word "wither" because that doesn't seem to be something that a "vessel" does. I tried, but couldn't think of anything that sounds as poetic and still apply to a dying vehicle without sounding hokey (Left to coast to a stop?, Left to conk out? Left to idle and die?)
Maybe there isn't one, but if you can think of a better word than "wither" that fits with the metaphor and sounds good, it would make it perfect. - Jim
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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This was really good, Jess. I loved the car metaphor you used throughout. It's a great one to express the excitement and forward motion of your love.
The only thing that bothered me a little was the word "wither" because that doesn't seem to be something that a "vessel" does. I tried, but couldn't think of anything that sounds as poetic and still apply to a dying vehicle without sounding hokey (Left to coast to a stop?, Left to conk out? Left to idle and die?)
Maybe there isn't one, but if you can think of a better word than "wither" that fits with the metaphor and sounds good, it would make it perfect. - Jim
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Ah, Jim, that's such a great point! That word was a last minute add, too lol You?re so right. I'm going to think on it. I originally had "rust" in its place. Thoughts?
You're the best, MM
XO
Jess
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Seems like that's too abrupt to go from moving to all of a sudden rusting away. I like the way "want" and "wither" both start with the same letter. It just sounds good, so how about something like "Left to slow and stall in the shadow of his leaving?"
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is a perfect way to describe love. Thank you for sharing this contest entry with us. Every woman should hold out for this type of man. I doubt you'll need it but good luck with this contest.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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This is a perfect way to describe love. Thank you for sharing this contest entry with us. Every woman should hold out for this type of man. I doubt you'll need it but good luck with this contest.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Barbara!
Comment from nomi338
This so good, I wish some woman, any woman was writing this about me. I would stand and strut so, you would hate me. I would not care, I would truly be full of myself, I would be insufferable.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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This so good, I wish some woman, any woman was writing this about me. I would stand and strut so, you would hate me. I would not care, I would truly be full of myself, I would be insufferable.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Nomi! Xoxo
Comment from Sally Law
Well, you've won the contest in my humble opinion. This is marvelous love poetry and a beautifully crafted work of art. A virtual six and my vote if we're given the privilege.
Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest.
Sal xoxo
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Well, you've won the contest in my humble opinion. This is marvelous love poetry and a beautifully crafted work of art. A virtual six and my vote if we're given the privilege.
Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest.
Sal xoxo
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, My Sally! Sending love! Xoxo
Jess
Comment from patcelaw
This is a lovely poem that you have written for the what is love contest I wish you the very best in the contest. Sometimes in life, we find that one that makes everything right for us and it sounds like this writer has found that one. Patricia.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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This is a lovely poem that you have written for the what is love contest I wish you the very best in the contest. Sometimes in life, we find that one that makes everything right for us and it sounds like this writer has found that one. Patricia.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Patricia!
Comment from jim vecchio
Love has rarely been expressed in such eloquent words and images as this poem. The object of that love is extremely fortunate to have found you. Everyone needs and wants that kind of love. As you indicate in that final stanza, we are so empty without it.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Love has rarely been expressed in such eloquent words and images as this poem. The object of that love is extremely fortunate to have found you. Everyone needs and wants that kind of love. As you indicate in that final stanza, we are so empty without it.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Jim!
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Thank you for immortalizing that wonderful state of being!
Comment from Janis M.
I like the analogy you use throughout the poem with that of cars or things related to it, driving, propelling, brakes etc.. It is a very lovely free verse with a lot of sensual emotions.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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I like the analogy you use throughout the poem with that of cars or things related to it, driving, propelling, brakes etc.. It is a very lovely free verse with a lot of sensual emotions.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, Janis!
Xo