Faded Red Kayak
tanka21 total reviews
Comment from R.B.Bunn
Not what I was expecting when I read the title. The last line really is a punch. You did a good job at making me feel sad for the old kayak and cottage. You also kept to the form of a tanka well.
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2022
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Not what I was expecting when I read the title. The last line really is a punch. You did a good job at making me feel sad for the old kayak and cottage. You also kept to the form of a tanka well.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2022
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That's the way tanka should read. Thank you for noticing. I really appreciate your review.
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
'Faded Red Kayak', is an extremely well-written and deftly descriptive piece. Penned with craft and skill. This talented poet has told it as it is. Good luck with the contest. Please let me know how you get on?
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2022
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'Faded Red Kayak', is an extremely well-written and deftly descriptive piece. Penned with craft and skill. This talented poet has told it as it is. Good luck with the contest. Please let me know how you get on?
Comment Written 18-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2022
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Thank you so much. Your reviews are always so welcome and well written.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I love the variations in subjects and styles in the poetry written here on this site. Is this for the contest ending April 30? I wrote my first Tanka for that contest, inspired by poets like you. Good luck.
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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I love the variations in subjects and styles in the poetry written here on this site. Is this for the contest ending April 30? I wrote my first Tanka for that contest, inspired by poets like you. Good luck.
Comment Written 17-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Yes, it's for that contest. I am so glad I helped your Muse along. Years ago on this site there used to be a great Japanese Short Form teacher, and unfortunately he passed away. I wish there could more really good mentors like him on this site, but unfortunately not so many especially for Japanese short Form. Thank you so much for this lovely review.
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You're welcome.
Comment from Anne Johnston
Your tanka is very well done, and you have chosen a great picture to illustrate. It tells a sad story, of missing the things you used to enjoy, the cottage and the lake, and memories of good times.
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Your tanka is very well done, and you have chosen a great picture to illustrate. It tells a sad story, of missing the things you used to enjoy, the cottage and the lake, and memories of good times.
Comment Written 17-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Thank you for the lovely review.
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You are welcome
Comment from Carolyn Dooley
This is a beautiful place in the picture. Someone will come along and wash that dirt off of those paddles. And hopefully enjoy that lovely place. Thank you for sharing this story in a few words turned into a poem. Have a great Easter.
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2022
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This is a beautiful place in the picture. Someone will come along and wash that dirt off of those paddles. And hopefully enjoy that lovely place. Thank you for sharing this story in a few words turned into a poem. Have a great Easter.
Comment Written 16-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2022
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Happy Easter, to you also, thank you for this well written review. It is well appreciated
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You are welcome.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This activity is full of fun and we them move on and sell our equipment rather than let it gather dust, but the magic of the moment is always remembered, much enjoyed Val, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2022
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This activity is full of fun and we them move on and sell our equipment rather than let it gather dust, but the magic of the moment is always remembered, much enjoyed Val, love Dolly x
Comment Written 14-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2022
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Thank you, for really getting this tanka.
Comment from Debra White
Hello Val :)
The imagery you create in your tanka is clear.
I love the personification of the canoe - that it longs to be out on the lake again. Time seems to stand still for the cottage.
Both cottage and canoe are past their prime and appear to be watching from the sidelines as life goes on and the sun continues to shine upon the lake.
Beautifully written and presented.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes as always, Debra :)
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2022
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Hello Val :)
The imagery you create in your tanka is clear.
I love the personification of the canoe - that it longs to be out on the lake again. Time seems to stand still for the cottage.
Both cottage and canoe are past their prime and appear to be watching from the sidelines as life goes on and the sun continues to shine upon the lake.
Beautifully written and presented.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes as always, Debra :)
Comment Written 14-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2022
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Debra, what a stunning review. They've become very rare. I am glad you liked that line, as I sometimes struggle with personification in Japanese Short Form. Have a wonderful day
Comment from l.raven
Hi Val, I am so sorry to hear that...
it looks beautiful my sweet friend...
but they say God never closes one door...
without opening another...and I believe that...
I will keep you in my prayers sweet girl...
I love your poem...though sad...and love your
stunning picture...very well written...love you...Linda xxoo
I hope you are doing well Val...and you are staying safe...
God Bless you...xxoo
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Hi Val, I am so sorry to hear that...
it looks beautiful my sweet friend...
but they say God never closes one door...
without opening another...and I believe that...
I will keep you in my prayers sweet girl...
I love your poem...though sad...and love your
stunning picture...very well written...love you...Linda xxoo
I hope you are doing well Val...and you are staying safe...
God Bless you...xxoo
Comment Written 13-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Thank you, Linda, it's so nice to hear from you. Yes, it's sad, but as you say another door opens.
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yes it does...and it's so good to hear from you to...your always so welcome my friend...
love you...xxoo
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Val,
I enjoyed your poem, although I have to admit, it made me a little sad. I always end up wondering what happened whenever I see a business for sale. Someone's dreams and blood, sweat and tears go in to it. I wish I were on that mountain lake in that red kayak. Thanks for sharing.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Hello Val,
I enjoyed your poem, although I have to admit, it made me a little sad. I always end up wondering what happened whenever I see a business for sale. Someone's dreams and blood, sweat and tears go in to it. I wish I were on that mountain lake in that red kayak. Thanks for sharing.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
Comment Written 13-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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I know, sometimes things are sad. But ignoring changes, makes life sadder. It might be a new beginning, but not necessarily an ending to my cottage.
Comment from jessizero
This was a melancholy piece, but it was pretty. I appreciate the imagery. Thank you for choosing to share this here. Keep up the good work, and best wishes.
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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This was a melancholy piece, but it was pretty. I appreciate the imagery. Thank you for choosing to share this here. Keep up the good work, and best wishes.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Thank you