The Return
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "The Return Chapter 6"Erotic Turmoil
37 total reviews
Comment from estory
i think you have a pretty solid post here. I like how you have Meg feeling the presence of Miles, it is creepy but we also get that love that they used to share in a former life. Then the trip to the cemetery really ratchets it up a notch. I think you did a good job of describing Meg's anxiety and how strange she feels as she approaches the grave. We also get how she seems to be trying to hold on to her self in this world, as she struggles to try to get back to work. Interesting concept here. estory
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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i think you have a pretty solid post here. I like how you have Meg feeling the presence of Miles, it is creepy but we also get that love that they used to share in a former life. Then the trip to the cemetery really ratchets it up a notch. I think you did a good job of describing Meg's anxiety and how strange she feels as she approaches the grave. We also get how she seems to be trying to hold on to her self in this world, as she struggles to try to get back to work. Interesting concept here. estory
Comment Written 07-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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What a lovely review, estory, thank you so much! You've really sussed this part out, which I love about your reviews. Thank you! Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from BLACKTITANIUM86
This reads like a novel, written by Sidney Sheldon...
who is one of my favorite writers. For, his novels never
lack mystery, action and excitement. And you are doing
a good job at keeping the attention of your readers. Well
Done. Stay Connected.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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This reads like a novel, written by Sidney Sheldon...
who is one of my favorite writers. For, his novels never
lack mystery, action and excitement. And you are doing
a good job at keeping the attention of your readers. Well
Done. Stay Connected.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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What a lovely comliment! Thank you so much. I'm delighted you are enjoying the story. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Ethan Vandervelden
As always a really good chapter! There were two spots that I absolutely loved the detail you put in!
The first was in the description of Margot's clothing as that is well described and makes it easy to picture her.
The second was how you described the beginning of her run and the nature around her, it was relaxing to read about that area!
Very well done! Thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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As always a really good chapter! There were two spots that I absolutely loved the detail you put in!
The first was in the description of Margot's clothing as that is well described and makes it easy to picture her.
The second was how you described the beginning of her run and the nature around her, it was relaxing to read about that area!
Very well done! Thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 07-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much, Ethan, for another fabulous review. I've just fanned you, I should have done it before, and now I'll catch up with your book. The prologue sounded very good.
Thank you for telling me what you liked in this chapter, I really appreciate that. And a big hug for that lovely sixth star! Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra
Comment from dmt1967
His soft husky voice, (that) seemed to come from an ethereal world(, was) like balm to an open wound. (delete) (felt)
She sat, (and putting) her elbows on the kitchen table(,) she rested her chin in the palms of her hands. (put) (and)
This time, Margot got up and grabbed her car keys, (then) marched up to the door, (collecting) her coat (on the way). She (reached out determinedly), opened the door and stepped outside. (Then stopped). In my opinion, this sounds very jerky. (delete) (collected) (delete) There is no reason, in my opinion, to add any more information to this. (gritted her teeth) This, in my opinion, shows her determination. (Her feet refused to carry her any further.) Again, in my opinion, this is showing.
Another really good chapter. Thank you for sharing and have a great week.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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His soft husky voice, (that) seemed to come from an ethereal world(, was) like balm to an open wound. (delete) (felt)
She sat, (and putting) her elbows on the kitchen table(,) she rested her chin in the palms of her hands. (put) (and)
This time, Margot got up and grabbed her car keys, (then) marched up to the door, (collecting) her coat (on the way). She (reached out determinedly), opened the door and stepped outside. (Then stopped). In my opinion, this sounds very jerky. (delete) (collected) (delete) There is no reason, in my opinion, to add any more information to this. (gritted her teeth) This, in my opinion, shows her determination. (Her feet refused to carry her any further.) Again, in my opinion, this is showing.
Another really good chapter. Thank you for sharing and have a great week.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Thank you, my friend, I've made some changes, thanks for your suggestions. Warm hugs! :) Sandra xx
Comment from Melodie Michelle
Excellent story my friend! The storyline is captivating and held my attention throughout the piece and the characters bounce off one another nicely;-) The imagery is perfect and I want to thank you for sharing this well written piece with us and may God bless you and your family!
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Excellent story my friend! The storyline is captivating and held my attention throughout the piece and the characters bounce off one another nicely;-) The imagery is perfect and I want to thank you for sharing this well written piece with us and may God bless you and your family!
Comment Written 07-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Melodie, I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)) xx
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;-)
Comment from lyenochka
And I'm wondering where Bessie was buried. Lol. She is one very mysterious character who "pops up" just at the strangest times. And I wonder what that force was that affected Margot and kept her from going to work. At least, it was Bessie who saw her and not a workmate. Another intriguing chapter!
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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And I'm wondering where Bessie was buried. Lol. She is one very mysterious character who "pops up" just at the strangest times. And I wonder what that force was that affected Margot and kept her from going to work. At least, it was Bessie who saw her and not a workmate. Another intriguing chapter!
Comment Written 07-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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I'm beginning to love Bessie's character. She's getting everyone guessing. Lol. Thanks, Helen, I'm glad you found it intriguing. Have a lovely day. :)) Sandra xx
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You, too!! 💖
Comment from judiverse
This really draws the reader in. It has an eerie atmosphere. Margot is letting the house get to her. I wonder if her feeling of panic that prevents her from going back to work is going to stay with her. If she doesn't get back to normal surroundings, she may crack up herself. Great job of presenting how the desire to find out more about Meg and Miles is driving her, as she feels there's a connection. I'm eager to find out what it is. Maybe the graves will tell her something. judi
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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This really draws the reader in. It has an eerie atmosphere. Margot is letting the house get to her. I wonder if her feeling of panic that prevents her from going back to work is going to stay with her. If she doesn't get back to normal surroundings, she may crack up herself. Great job of presenting how the desire to find out more about Meg and Miles is driving her, as she feels there's a connection. I'm eager to find out what it is. Maybe the graves will tell her something. judi
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Judi! What a lovely review, you've picked up some good points that will be answered soon. :) Thank you that golden star, that's so kind of you. I really do appreciate both the review and the stars. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
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You're welcome. This chapter really arouses the reader's interest. I'll be interested to know about the graves, and if they reveal anything. judi
Comment from Shirley McLain
This is full of tension because of her panic attack about leaving the house. Excellent job in keeping me transfixed to the storyline. I didn't see any mistakes. Have a great evening. Shirley
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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This is full of tension because of her panic attack about leaving the house. Excellent job in keeping me transfixed to the storyline. I didn't see any mistakes. Have a great evening. Shirley
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Shirley, for this lovely review, and for the golden sixth star. I always appreciate you, and your wonderful comments. Love and hugs, my friend. Sandra xx
Comment from aryr
An amazing continuation chapter, Sandra. Your words had many questions built into them. Why did Bessie have something to do? Was Margot really ready to return to work? Did she need more time? Was Mile's really a ghostly lover? Why did Bessie show up at the graveyard? And why did she know about their grave? Definitely answers that I hope to find before the book is done. Great job, very well done and greatly enjoyed. Blessings, hugs n smiles!
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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An amazing continuation chapter, Sandra. Your words had many questions built into them. Why did Bessie have something to do? Was Margot really ready to return to work? Did she need more time? Was Mile's really a ghostly lover? Why did Bessie show up at the graveyard? And why did she know about their grave? Definitely answers that I hope to find before the book is done. Great job, very well done and greatly enjoyed. Blessings, hugs n smiles!
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much, Alie, for this really great review. I love all the questions, but I'm not going to answer them ... yet! Lol. I'm glad you are enjoying my story, thanks for all the encouragement you keep giving me. Love and hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
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You are so welcome Sandra, now I wouldn't expect you to answer them. They were just me thinking. Blessings, hugs n smiles!
Comment from Chrissy710
Hi Sandra well done I have gone back (again) to catch up on chapters 4.5.6. All worthy sixes Your style of writing is enjoyable, descriptive, and engaging. You always end your chapters leaving the reader wanting more so I will try to keep up, if not I will back track ( May even run into Meg and Bessie lol)
As always Cheers xx Chris
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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Hi Sandra well done I have gone back (again) to catch up on chapters 4.5.6. All worthy sixes Your style of writing is enjoyable, descriptive, and engaging. You always end your chapters leaving the reader wanting more so I will try to keep up, if not I will back track ( May even run into Meg and Bessie lol)
As always Cheers xx Chris
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2022
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You are so funny!!! LOL, if you meet them, please tell them to get in touch with me so I know where they're going! Lol.
Thank you so much, Chris, for another lovely review and for that sixth golden star, your reviews are always encouraging, and I do appreciate them. Love and hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
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Welcone