Secrets in the Wind
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "Secrets in the Wind - Chap 18"A story of loss, deceit, murder and crime
19 total reviews
Comment from Wendy G
Very interesting. I am guessing that faith and Liz may be twins, separated at birth - too much of a coincidence with both born on the same day and both adopted. Wouldn't Cassidy be returned to prison as soon as viable? Would they let her recuperate at Liz's place? Hope am not asking awkward questions! I am enjoying the story a lot.
Wendy
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
  |
Very interesting. I am guessing that faith and Liz may be twins, separated at birth - too much of a coincidence with both born on the same day and both adopted. Wouldn't Cassidy be returned to prison as soon as viable? Would they let her recuperate at Liz's place? Hope am not asking awkward questions! I am enjoying the story a lot.
Wendy
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
No awkward dquestions... You are playing detective with me, but I think (I am not sure) I think I might be ahead of you in another chapter or two...LOL
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Tantalizing--I'm guessing they are twins. And that you'll take your sweet time revealing it. Stunning rendition of her backstory.
I am sure she misses you, though I can't imagine why?=>PERIOD"
shive=>SHIV
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
Tantalizing--I'm guessing they are twins. And that you'll take your sweet time revealing it. Stunning rendition of her backstory.
I am sure she misses you, though I can't imagine why?=>PERIOD"
shive=>SHIV
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
Fixed and refixed. LOL
Thanks for the review and the assistance.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from BethShelby
The mystery deepens again. Now I'm wonding if Liz and Faith are twins and if so would Jack have known that. You have such an amazing and creative mind. I anxious to read your next chapter. I curious about the ladies living in the cottage.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
The mystery deepens again. Now I'm wonding if Liz and Faith are twins and if so would Jack have known that. You have such an amazing and creative mind. I anxious to read your next chapter. I curious about the ladies living in the cottage.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
Read on, Beth...
You are about to find out much more about the ladies in the cottage. Thank you for the review.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Susan Newell
Very nice. We're learning more about Liz and I'm getting suspicious about the shared birth date. Dialogue was natural, but I noticed you shied away from mixing in much narrative. I hope Hank goes through the Cranston papers before giving them away!
Writing notes:
as Emmy offered a few loving words to her husband, -- POV -- Liz couldn't hear this. Or was Emmy on a speaker phone?
though I can't imagine why?"-- not a question
expresso -- accepted spelling I guess, but purists would write espresso
with a tray with cookies, -- can reword to avoid with ... with
the shive went -- typo ==> shiv
I can't help but wonder if life would have been different?" -- not a question
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
Very nice. We're learning more about Liz and I'm getting suspicious about the shared birth date. Dialogue was natural, but I noticed you shied away from mixing in much narrative. I hope Hank goes through the Cranston papers before giving them away!
Writing notes:
as Emmy offered a few loving words to her husband, -- POV -- Liz couldn't hear this. Or was Emmy on a speaker phone?
though I can't imagine why?"-- not a question
expresso -- accepted spelling I guess, but purists would write espresso
with a tray with cookies, -- can reword to avoid with ... with
the shive went -- typo ==> shiv
I can't help but wonder if life would have been different?" -- not a question
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
Thanks for the awesome review as always....
I am down to the last six of 65 and i can't remember what I've fixed and what I didn't...but I did bring it up side by side to fix your suggestions...that's why i always leave yours for last so I make sure I get it right.
Smiles, Carol
-
Oh my word! 65 reviews!
-
Yup! Most I've every had to answer at one time...
Comment from Ric Myworld
There is always more going on in your stories that what first meets the eyes. So, I've learned to sit back, say nothing, and just pay close attention. LOL. Thanks for sharing.
Liz shooked her head and then continued,
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
There is always more going on in your stories that what first meets the eyes. So, I've learned to sit back, say nothing, and just pay close attention. LOL. Thanks for sharing.
Liz shooked her head and then continued,
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
Thank you for realizing you never know where I am heading. LOL
Always love to keep you guessing.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
-
I figured you for the type who would always want to keep people guessing. LOL.
-
You figured right!
(((Hugs)))
-
(((HUGS))) I bet you can even see me smiling! But even if you can, don't tell me. That would be too weird. :-)
Comment from Terry Overton
You have a great use of the dialogue in this chapter. It sounds like a fairly complex plot and just reading this one chapter I can see there is much I don't know about the events in the previous chapters. But the writing is good and I enjoyed it.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
You have a great use of the dialogue in this chapter. It sounds like a fairly complex plot and just reading this one chapter I can see there is much I don't know about the events in the previous chapters. But the writing is good and I enjoyed it.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
And there is so much more to come, Terry. I tend to have several plots going at once that end up twisting and connecting together. Glad you enjoyed.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from royowen
Liz starts to unload to Hank what's on her mind, not thinking very highly of herself, at which point Hank corrects her. We should never think of ourselves anyway, other than if Christ thought us worth dying for, then we are without price, think of the most valuable gemstone and multiply many times over. Beautifully written Carol, blessings Roy
Typo :Liz (shocked) her head. Shook? 2 : St. Francis (covenant) convent?
3: I was their(,) daughter
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
Liz starts to unload to Hank what's on her mind, not thinking very highly of herself, at which point Hank corrects her. We should never think of ourselves anyway, other than if Christ thought us worth dying for, then we are without price, think of the most valuable gemstone and multiply many times over. Beautifully written Carol, blessings Roy
Typo :Liz (shocked) her head. Shook? 2 : St. Francis (covenant) convent?
3: I was their(,) daughter
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
thanks Roy...Appreciate the help and the review. Glad you are enjoying the story. Fixed and all set.
smiles, Carol
-
Well done Carol
Comment from barbara.wilkey
So we will soon meet Faith. We also have more information on Liz. Sounds good. I like this story.
Hank popped one of them into cookies. ( Hank popped one into his mouth. I think it reads better. & I'm confused. I thought only Liz's husband knew Hank and Liz didn't meet him until he can to town. Am I wrong???)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
|
So we will soon meet Faith. We also have more information on Liz. Sounds good. I like this story.
Hank popped one of them into cookies. ( Hank popped one into his mouth. I think it reads better. & I'm confused. I thought only Liz's husband knew Hank and Liz didn't meet him until he can to town. Am I wrong???)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2021
-
thanks for the review and reminding of a goof I need to fix... I think I did say Liz hadn't met Hank...easy fix but you are correct. Better mind than mine.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from robyn corum
Carol,
Hmmm... you make it seem like this is mostly a transitional chapter - just offering another few extra tidbits of background info. BUT I have a distinct feeling some of this will come up again and that the fact that those two ladies have the same birthdate might be very important somehow. Hmmm... My wheels are turning, turning...
Notes, if I may:
1.) Hank's style of coffee was almost an expresso with just enough water, so the spoon didn't stand at attention in the mug.
--> no comma
2.) Hank popped one of them into cookies.
--> if this referring to his hands or what?
3.) it appears you and Jack had it operating quite well."
--> have? (Still is, right?)
4.) Liz shocked her head and then continued,
--> cocked?
5.) I was their, daughter and that's all that mattered.
--> no comma
6.) She taught me everything from boys, (to) makeup, and how one
--> no comma after boys
Thanks, buddy. Very nice job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2021
|
Carol,
Hmmm... you make it seem like this is mostly a transitional chapter - just offering another few extra tidbits of background info. BUT I have a distinct feeling some of this will come up again and that the fact that those two ladies have the same birthdate might be very important somehow. Hmmm... My wheels are turning, turning...
Notes, if I may:
1.) Hank's style of coffee was almost an expresso with just enough water, so the spoon didn't stand at attention in the mug.
--> no comma
2.) Hank popped one of them into cookies.
--> if this referring to his hands or what?
3.) it appears you and Jack had it operating quite well."
--> have? (Still is, right?)
4.) Liz shocked her head and then continued,
--> cocked?
5.) I was their, daughter and that's all that mattered.
--> no comma
6.) She taught me everything from boys, (to) makeup, and how one
--> no comma after boys
Thanks, buddy. Very nice job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2021
-
Time for me to take a rest I think... I was fixing and editing on one page and reading from another one.... Then I posted the one I was reading. Duh! Thanks for pointing it out to me.... You are the best!
Smiles, Carol
-
Haha!! Sounds like robinitis!!