The Boat
A 5-7-5 poetry contest entry.214 total reviews
Comment from joeakeefe
I reward with five stars for the thought provoking essence of this brief piece.
We get where we are as a product of our free will. We look at alternatives and choose a "goal" or a "course of action" to which we subsequently subscribe. In many instances our error lies in not employing a discerning look at the value of this course of action and the reasons for doing so. What is the value to us as an individual? To what degree does it promote our own core values? You pose a most important question to which each of us should frame an answer with enthusiasm.
Joeakeefe
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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I reward with five stars for the thought provoking essence of this brief piece.
We get where we are as a product of our free will. We look at alternatives and choose a "goal" or a "course of action" to which we subsequently subscribe. In many instances our error lies in not employing a discerning look at the value of this course of action and the reasons for doing so. What is the value to us as an individual? To what degree does it promote our own core values? You pose a most important question to which each of us should frame an answer with enthusiasm.
Joeakeefe
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you for your depth of reading in my poem... most people thought it was a man kidnapped or having a hangover :P xD Much appreciated!
- G
Comment from justmarly
We got here for God formedd us in our mothers womb. If you're talking about a boat bring you there maybe you were a sleep and someone laid you there then yopu woke up and found yourself alone. Cute poem. Thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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We got here for God formedd us in our mothers womb. If you're talking about a boat bring you there maybe you were a sleep and someone laid you there then yopu woke up and found yourself alone. Cute poem. Thanks for sharing
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you for reviewing my poem and for the five stars! Without all of you, I would not have gotten all time best.
- G
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You are more than welcome. Jm
Comment from emjaihammond
Here is one that I completely understand and am compelled to speak about. How many times have a I been left on the pier? Not because I could not go and missed the boat, but at the last minute, I didn't know if I wanted to. Even after planning, like with this. Very nice piece.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Here is one that I completely understand and am compelled to speak about. How many times have a I been left on the pier? Not because I could not go and missed the boat, but at the last minute, I didn't know if I wanted to. Even after planning, like with this. Very nice piece.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you very much for your review and complements
- G
Comment from mystery poet
I'm content with your interpretation and I think
your words indicate just that and is enhanced by
the art you use to promote the thought. You should
do well with this short form in contest. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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I'm content with your interpretation and I think
your words indicate just that and is enhanced by
the art you use to promote the thought. You should
do well with this short form in contest. Best wishes.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you very much mystery poet! :P (will i ever find out who thought these things to me?) I just wrote what I felt it meant, and soooo many people actually see something different! It really is a pleasure to see all the things people can see it to mean.
- G
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It was a pleasure to read and comment.
Much luck in the contest! Joyce
Comment from denhagan
I thought this was a brilliant 5-7-5 poem--one of the best that I've read. In fact, since it involves human nature, it would also qualify as a senryu poem. Nice picture.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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I thought this was a brilliant 5-7-5 poem--one of the best that I've read. In fact, since it involves human nature, it would also qualify as a senryu poem. Nice picture.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you very much for the beautiful complement! :P makes me feel so good to have people who think my work is good. lol I even have gained a few fans from this poem!
- G
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You're welcome G,
Dennis
Comment from Sagnik Das
Wonderful! I for one do adore 'Romanticism' (which I felt this work bewrays), marked by an undertone of pensiveness (so far as I could devise), in respect of time.
To sum up an inference, it indeed fares well, in evoking a conspicuous array of cohesive mental images, & associative sensibilities, beseeming thereby my wholehearted appraisal ....
I love the suave effect of alliteration in 'stone still' & the clever effect of assonance all throughout (despite it being a 5-7-5).
The subtle brevity has also, been well utilized, especially in the concluding line (with a wee bit of profundity into the bargain)... "How did I get there," being an almost hapless deposition (or so I erroneously assume!)
Nevertheless, to infer aptly, this work possesses a terse vitality to appeal directly to the 'refined' aspects of sensibility, & fares wonderfully to stand out on its own -- & I have every reason to commend you hence -- well done.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Wonderful! I for one do adore 'Romanticism' (which I felt this work bewrays), marked by an undertone of pensiveness (so far as I could devise), in respect of time.
To sum up an inference, it indeed fares well, in evoking a conspicuous array of cohesive mental images, & associative sensibilities, beseeming thereby my wholehearted appraisal ....
I love the suave effect of alliteration in 'stone still' & the clever effect of assonance all throughout (despite it being a 5-7-5).
The subtle brevity has also, been well utilized, especially in the concluding line (with a wee bit of profundity into the bargain)... "How did I get there," being an almost hapless deposition (or so I erroneously assume!)
Nevertheless, to infer aptly, this work possesses a terse vitality to appeal directly to the 'refined' aspects of sensibility, & fares wonderfully to stand out on its own -- & I have every reason to commend you hence -- well done.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Not many people actually see all of the poetic elements I have slipped into my short poem. Thank you for your very thorough review and your positive opinion! I do mostly make romanticism poems, and soon I will be buying a membership, your wonderfully thorough reviews would make my day if you looked at them as well.
- G
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Ah Sagnik, I found a faster way to message you! :P I cannot get on my email right now because I am at my internship, and they have a site blocker for emailing sites and other things like youtube. I will email with you as soon as I get home, I must bid you adue for now my friend, only for a while though. I have an hour and a half left in this gloriously wonderful cage :P I love everything and everyone here. Its so fun.
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LOL ... very well then, Gabriel! Reach residence regally, & read my monotonous message meticulously then!!!!! :D
(PS ~ The email I mean!)
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Gabe, my boy!! -- YOU HAVE DONE IT!!!!! Bravo! :)
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What have I done exactly my friend? :P (this message was quite out of the blue and astounding to read.
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LOL ... was it?! well, I for one would never consider so! To get to the top of the front page on a bias site, wherein the vitality of a work is primarily adjudged by base monetary worth, rather than its intrinsic substantiality, is in itself a ROBUST achievement. And you, my dear friend, have done it! Brilliant! :D
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LOL! All of the reviews in the world have not in the least even heartened me more than your wholehearted support Sagnik! :P That you would pay attention to that, it astounds me.
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Thank you for noticing my poem, I did some adjusting due to extremly good advice from a reviewer friend of mine, perhaps you could take a gander (its not changed much, after all, it is still three lines.)
Comment from GWHARGIS
I did like the question of how did I get here. I like the use of the water and the boat as a metaphor for life and the destination. Great alliteration and imagery. Nice flow and the emotional impact was riveting. nicely done.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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I did like the question of how did I get here. I like the use of the water and the boat as a metaphor for life and the destination. Great alliteration and imagery. Nice flow and the emotional impact was riveting. nicely done.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you for your very heartening review :P
- G
Comment from weemick1960
I have often been in this situation, asking myself, "How did I get here?" It always amazes me how three lines can be so thought provoking or insightful depending on the content of the piece. It may take me about 60 - 100 words to ask that same question in my style. Yes, there you are and where is the next step. The picture also went well with the write, well done, all round....MIKE.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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I have often been in this situation, asking myself, "How did I get here?" It always amazes me how three lines can be so thought provoking or insightful depending on the content of the piece. It may take me about 60 - 100 words to ask that same question in my style. Yes, there you are and where is the next step. The picture also went well with the write, well done, all round....MIKE.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013
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Thank you very much for giving me such a great complement :P (I actually do really even like 5-7-5 or senyru or haiku, its the contest entry and only thing I could make for people to see) soon I shall be getting a membership and you can see all of my stuff! :P
- G
Comment from l.raven
Hi Gabriel, I most say I have asked myself many times how I got where I am. The ia a small poem with a big meaning to it. So very well written. Luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2013
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Hi Gabriel, I most say I have asked myself many times how I got where I am. The ia a small poem with a big meaning to it. So very well written. Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2013
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Wow! That it really a complement I really try to fit everything I can into my poems...
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You did a great job...xxoo
Comment from Irish Rain
i have been on that pier, almost weekly it seems, waiting for the boat to take me to? or perhaps away...loved this, poses many questions, good luck in this contest!
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2013
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i have been on that pier, almost weekly it seems, waiting for the boat to take me to? or perhaps away...loved this, poses many questions, good luck in this contest!
Comment Written 19-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2013
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Thank you for your review :) much appreciated!