Little ones
Viewing comments for Prologue "cocoon-life"5/7/5 poems
265 total reviews
Comment from rhonny
It's very good. It keeps within the format of 5-7-5 and yet it brings a great message to us. And it's so true. You did well.
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
It's very good. It keeps within the format of 5-7-5 and yet it brings a great message to us. And it's so true. You did well.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from Isaac Kavik
The naivity of youth is very well contructed here in so few words. Haiku is difficult to master. I think this one shows great promise of you becoming a master of it.
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
The naivity of youth is very well contructed here in so few words. Haiku is difficult to master. I think this one shows great promise of you becoming a master of it.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from wanderlost
Heart imagines life
beneath silver-sweet full moon
not out of cocoon
great work creating a well developed image in such a succinct way.
Wanderlost
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
Heart imagines life
beneath silver-sweet full moon
not out of cocoon
great work creating a well developed image in such a succinct way.
Wanderlost
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from words
I like your bittersweet write on the bliss of innocence.
I especially like these images:
Heart imagines life
beneath silver-sweet full moon
Well done.
d
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
I like your bittersweet write on the bliss of innocence.
I especially like these images:
Heart imagines life
beneath silver-sweet full moon
Well done.
d
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from kiwisteveh
Nice idea, the imagination versus reality and the cocoon image is striking.
If I had one concern, it would be that the last line, at first reding, seems to be connected to the silver sweet moon line that precedes it. I wonder if something like 'then the cocoon opens' would work better here...
Steve
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
Nice idea, the imagination versus reality and the cocoon image is striking.
If I had one concern, it would be that the last line, at first reding, seems to be connected to the silver sweet moon line that precedes it. I wonder if something like 'then the cocoon opens' would work better here...
Steve
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from Auroraboreal800
This is a well written poem, with a powerful and deep message. You pulled it off masterfully in this. A very good piece indeed.
Nicely done piece Anupam!
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
This is a well written poem, with a powerful and deep message. You pulled it off masterfully in this. A very good piece indeed.
Nicely done piece Anupam!
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
You and I were some of the lucky children with two good parents who took care of us so that we felt as if we were in a safe cocoon. Your Haiku captures that feeling. So sad that we adults get so selfish the world completely changes, when we emerge from the chrysalis. Giddy.
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
You and I were some of the lucky children with two good parents who took care of us so that we felt as if we were in a safe cocoon. Your Haiku captures that feeling. So sad that we adults get so selfish the world completely changes, when we emerge from the chrysalis. Giddy.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from JRaeVaughn
After reading your notes I am reminded of the expression "you can't go home again" but it is a comfort to know at least one real life hero, someone that will help protest us against a harsh world. A very good, thought provoking write that observes the simplistic nature of the form. Well done, JR
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
After reading your notes I am reminded of the expression "you can't go home again" but it is a comfort to know at least one real life hero, someone that will help protest us against a harsh world. A very good, thought provoking write that observes the simplistic nature of the form. Well done, JR
Comment Written 02-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
-
You're most welcome Anupam. Best wishes, JR
Comment from poeticpatchwork
I can relate to wanting to go back into the cocoon of childhood before adult responsibility intruded! I enjoyed your poem! It always amazes me how much can be said in so few words! Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
I can relate to wanting to go back into the cocoon of childhood before adult responsibility intruded! I enjoyed your poem! It always amazes me how much can be said in so few words! Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 01-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)
Comment from Caressa_08
Was just thinking about the little white butterfly so enjoying my backyard this morning...So glad, I came across this wonderful poem &, too, your author notes, that too tell a lot that yes, life isn't all that comforting.
relieve, I think you meant to type..
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
Was just thinking about the little white butterfly so enjoying my backyard this morning...So glad, I came across this wonderful poem &, too, your author notes, that too tell a lot that yes, life isn't all that comforting.
relieve, I think you meant to type..
Comment Written 01-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
-
Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:-)