Steve's Story-Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Country Justice"A collection of my poems
100 total reviews
Comment from bob cullen
Your make reading poetry fun. Your writing entertains and promotes good cheer and smiles. It's a pity there are not more poets like you on the site.
From a poetic viewpoint you present great balance in rhythm and rhyme. Your words flow smoothly.
It is a pleasure to read poetry such as this
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Your make reading poetry fun. Your writing entertains and promotes good cheer and smiles. It's a pity there are not more poets like you on the site.
From a poetic viewpoint you present great balance in rhythm and rhyme. Your words flow smoothly.
It is a pleasure to read poetry such as this
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thanks, Bob.
You obviously like my stuff - I don't think I've ever had a negative word from you - there are others on the site who can come up with similar things - I am very impressed with phattp's entry in this contes. jackpeg doesn't write often enough but some of his pieces are classics - check out the 'engineer' one...
Thanks for the compliment.
Steve
Comment from KiwiGal
Uh oh, no six to give you, but anyway a ten is intended. Outstanding verse - good to see (the) Justice was done - in all ways, hehe.
As soon as I saw 'servo', I read it with an Australian twang echoing in my ears.
I am so glad 'knob' rhymes with 'Rob'... and I bet you are too. I love starting the day with a smile on my face and a chuckle in my voice. You manage that every time. You are, simply, Too Good. (Haven't used that expression since I was a teenager!)
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Uh oh, no six to give you, but anyway a ten is intended. Outstanding verse - good to see (the) Justice was done - in all ways, hehe.
As soon as I saw 'servo', I read it with an Australian twang echoing in my ears.
I am so glad 'knob' rhymes with 'Rob'... and I bet you are too. I love starting the day with a smile on my face and a chuckle in my voice. You manage that every time. You are, simply, Too Good. (Haven't used that expression since I was a teenager!)
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you - Put my heart and soul into this one and borrowed one of Banjo's metres (from Bush Christening) as I already knew competition whould be tough - check out the 'Natural Born Mechanic' - this bloke is almost as good as me (hehe)
Roberta was carefully chosen and has echoes of a similarly mixed up character in 'The World According to Garp' - Roberta Muldoon if I remember correctly which always struck me as funny given our PM at the time...
love to hear of chuckles and smiles - SWMBO loved it too.
Steve
Comment from the blue pixel
Ha ha ha ha. What a ripper Steve. You surely are the King of funny quatrains. Perfect, flawless rhyme and metre. I wouldn't want to be competing against this oe (and I hope that I'm not). Great story too which was funny enough even without the final twist. It sounded a little like the scenario of Gilbert and Sullivan's Trial by Jury but the last bit just floored me. Fantastic. Every inch, a six. lol xxx Pix
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Ha ha ha ha. What a ripper Steve. You surely are the King of funny quatrains. Perfect, flawless rhyme and metre. I wouldn't want to be competing against this oe (and I hope that I'm not). Great story too which was funny enough even without the final twist. It sounded a little like the scenario of Gilbert and Sullivan's Trial by Jury but the last bit just floored me. Fantastic. Every inch, a six. lol xxx Pix
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you - I actually saw this comp. come up and thought 'ooh, that's right down my street.' Then I checked out the competition and there's a very, very funny poem about a bloke and a bicycle - author is Phatt (or something like that) - check it out and ask yourself who it reminds you of....
Thanks for the six - G&S were wonderful of course - don't know if we'll ever see creativity like that again - it's all diverted into different media these days - brilliance is still there, just emerging in different forms...
Steve
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I just just read a few of the entries Steve. I saw phatt's but it was just too long for me at the moment - long day and broken foot hasn't helped but I don't think you have a worry in the world. You are probably right about where G & S type stuff is these days. I gather you think phatt is your only competition so I'll take the time and have a read. There was one was about as funny as a funny bone that's been snapped in two. I think this poor writer didn't read the rules properly. Who knows but I think this is one of your very best and that's saying something as there are so many to choose from with you my friend. I forgot to wish you good luck but that was probably because I didn't think you needed it and I still don't. xx Pix
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What HAVE you been doing to your foot? Not kicking poor hubby, I hope. I haven't seen a poem about it.
Just started looking through the other opposition - Sue galetti has a good one as well, although a slightly mixed up form...
Steve
Comment from Betty517
I am still laughing. This is quite entertaining and flows like warm melted chocolate! You are a very fierce competitor in this competition. Your poem is both excellent in rhyme and excellent in humor! Good luck in contest! Although I don't think you need it with this one!
Betty
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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I am still laughing. This is quite entertaining and flows like warm melted chocolate! You are a very fierce competitor in this competition. Your poem is both excellent in rhyme and excellent in humor! Good luck in contest! Although I don't think you need it with this one!
Betty
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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I needed to be fierce - some of the competition is hot so I pulled out all the stops on this one...
Steve
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You sure did! Fear not! Betty
Comment from atty.may
kiwisteveh, Absolutely hysterical. Taken so eloquently, so rhythmically, so wonderfully to the absurd. IMO so many rhymes seem so strained I can't stand them (and I can't write them). I'm a lawyer and will share this with my fellows. Best of luck. -May
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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kiwisteveh, Absolutely hysterical. Taken so eloquently, so rhythmically, so wonderfully to the absurd. IMO so many rhymes seem so strained I can't stand them (and I can't write them). I'm a lawyer and will share this with my fellows. Best of luck. -May
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you so much - I really wanted to put a bit more lawyer-speak in there, preferably of the double entendre variety, but quite pleased with it as it is - flowing rhymes mu speciality - plenty more in the portfolio if you ever have time to browse.
Steve
Comment from manicblue
Ha! That's funny, steve. Reminds me of something gazzagodbod might write...a poem with a surprise ending. And you did an excellent job of it! It almost had a 'limerick' tone to it. I wish you well in this contest!
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Ha! That's funny, steve. Reminds me of something gazzagodbod might write...a poem with a surprise ending. And you did an excellent job of it! It almost had a 'limerick' tone to it. I wish you well in this contest!
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for your kind words, mb
Steve
Comment from Rama Rao
ROFL.
I was in splits reading your poem and would have given you six stars. It flowed as smoothly as silk on soft skin, rhymed well and made hilarious reading. The only word against the poem is "exploiting'. A woman doesn't exploit her assets. We exploit her for her charms. Perhaps exhibiting or displaying would do. The next line was the best- not forgetting the punchline at the end.
A great job.
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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ROFL.
I was in splits reading your poem and would have given you six stars. It flowed as smoothly as silk on soft skin, rhymed well and made hilarious reading. The only word against the poem is "exploiting'. A woman doesn't exploit her assets. We exploit her for her charms. Perhaps exhibiting or displaying would do. The next line was the best- not forgetting the punchline at the end.
A great job.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the lovely review - I thought this contest was right up my alley, but I saw a couple of other entries that were truly funny, so I thought I'd really have to pull out all the stops. I'm not quite sure why you object to 'exploiting' so strongly - there are many people of both sexes who are not above exploiting their appearance for pesonal or financial gain... In this case, most of the assets were false anyway!
Steve
Comment from Serri
Hilariously funny. Being from a small town I can relate to many parts of this quatrain poem! Those of us around here are always poking fun at the way things are, all in good fun.
Loved the picture of Augustus McGraw and how funny you made his character! Nice rhyming, punctuation, wording. Pleasant, flowing, comfortable reading. Thank you! Good Luck! Blessings, Serri
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Hilariously funny. Being from a small town I can relate to many parts of this quatrain poem! Those of us around here are always poking fun at the way things are, all in good fun.
Loved the picture of Augustus McGraw and how funny you made his character! Nice rhyming, punctuation, wording. Pleasant, flowing, comfortable reading. Thank you! Good Luck! Blessings, Serri
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thanks, Serri.
I test my poems on my wife and she was in fits over this one, so I knew it would do well.
Steve
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Grand idea and smart wif:)e!
Comment from Levinthian
Absolutely hilarious! Very well written and clever. The word choice couldn't be better.
And what an ending.
You gave me a good and well needed laugh tonight.
Thank you
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reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Absolutely hilarious! Very well written and clever. The word choice couldn't be better.
And what an ending.
You gave me a good and well needed laugh tonight.
Thank you
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Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you - laughter is truly the best medicine - I am always delighted when a reader tells me I have made them laugh.
Steve
Comment from The Stranger
pleaise igmore any spelling errors, I havr been on the termazepan again-this was indeedfunny as the poem intriduced a buxom character who was accused odf indecent exposure, and also for speering through the quite little town
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reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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pleaise igmore any spelling errors, I havr been on the termazepan again-this was indeedfunny as the poem intriduced a buxom character who was accused odf indecent exposure, and also for speering through the quite little town
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thanks for your kind review.
Steve