How This Critter Crits
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Micro-Critting"GROWTH? ADULATION? HURRY -- CHOOSE!
97 total reviews
Comment from PatriciaLiteHickman
I think you can delete some of the line spaces between enjoy and the title :-)
The para that begins with "Raven Aorla" looks like it needs some formatting help; not sure if it was intentional or not;
the examples were amusing but for me at times hard to follow; well written, nothing to correct;
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
I think you can delete some of the line spaces between enjoy and the title :-)
The para that begins with "Raven Aorla" looks like it needs some formatting help; not sure if it was intentional or not;
the examples were amusing but for me at times hard to follow; well written, nothing to correct;
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
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"Hard to follow" is the problem I have with this piece. If you've read any of the previous segments, they tended to be loosely structured, but logical in their format. This time I felt about the same as you. This will not go down as one of my better chapters. Thank you for being gentle with me, though.
Jay
Comment from Lady & Louis
Interesting and amusing as ever, Jay - the only thing I'd question is the choice of example about the first and second paragraphs not tying in (the child who decided he didn't like cats). The reason I (and most people, I sincerely hope) wouldn't follow through with that work is that the character is utterly repulsive. I wouldn't get to the second paragraph, I'd turn away in disgust. If I went back at all (which is highly unlikely) it would be in the hope of seeing him get a stick of dynamite up his arse in the near future. Would a less revolting subject do to illustrate the point?
Nothing else to say, the article was fine!
La Maitresse
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
Interesting and amusing as ever, Jay - the only thing I'd question is the choice of example about the first and second paragraphs not tying in (the child who decided he didn't like cats). The reason I (and most people, I sincerely hope) wouldn't follow through with that work is that the character is utterly repulsive. I wouldn't get to the second paragraph, I'd turn away in disgust. If I went back at all (which is highly unlikely) it would be in the hope of seeing him get a stick of dynamite up his arse in the near future. Would a less revolting subject do to illustrate the point?
Nothing else to say, the article was fine!
La Maitresse
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
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I admit to the repulsiveness of it (and I'm glad you pointed it out). I was trying to come up with enough of a total contrast in the two aspects of one character to drive home my point, that there has to be a followthrough of consistency. I do thank you for your usual kind remarks as to the worthwhile-ness of the article as a whole.
Jay
Comment from Lois Delaney
This was a fun read jay! You show insight in spite of your humorous diversions. LOL I'm so glad you started this series and hope you keep up with it. It's a hoot and yet sends a message for critiquing and writing. Good `choice and a joy to read!
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
This was a fun read jay! You show insight in spite of your humorous diversions. LOL I'm so glad you started this series and hope you keep up with it. It's a hoot and yet sends a message for critiquing and writing. Good `choice and a joy to read!
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
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Thank you so very much, Housemaid. I'm glad your staying the course (how easily that phrase slips into the vocabulary. I hope you don't leave until I have total control over my country. Bless you. Your comments are always a joy to receive.
Jay
Comment from Marjorie D.
Not only is this very useful, Jay, it's funny and entertaining as well! What you say makes a great deal of sense and comparing the 'promise' in a book to the 'promise' made by insurance benefits was truly clever.
Notes:
...we've put on our clothes back on...
(Omit first 'on'.)
How's this be for my opening? (Omit 'be'.)
Great stuff!
Marjorie
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
Not only is this very useful, Jay, it's funny and entertaining as well! What you say makes a great deal of sense and comparing the 'promise' in a book to the 'promise' made by insurance benefits was truly clever.
Notes:
...we've put on our clothes back on...
(Omit first 'on'.)
How's this be for my opening? (Omit 'be'.)
Great stuff!
Marjorie
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2006
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Well, now ... that's embarrassing! After the dozen or so times I've edited the piece. Thank you for pointing it out. I look forward to having you back for the remaning chapters.
Jay
Comment from tecate
Yes, oh master of critiquing...another lesson for us inspired to turn out the next best seller. Rest assured I'll follow well your advice as I am now on the development of characters. I hope the others reading this will follow your advice for the sake of their readers...Tecate
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2006
Yes, oh master of critiquing...another lesson for us inspired to turn out the next best seller. Rest assured I'll follow well your advice as I am now on the development of characters. I hope the others reading this will follow your advice for the sake of their readers...Tecate
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2006
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Hey, Robert, thanks for your kind words. This chapter has been a real struggle. I thought it was going to be easy, but I was so wrong. I do appreciate your comments, though, and am honored to have you aboard.
Jay
Comment from Donaya Haymond
Yay! I am honored, highly, highly honored. This has been an excellent weekend for me, and this topped it off, even though I knew it was coming. I wish I could squeal and give you a hug, like I wanted to when Sallyo mentioned Ferdinand in an essay as an example of "an excellent fictional vampire." The six stars aren't just thanking you, though. This is a well-written piece, conversational, yet helpful, and a worthwhile guide for any writer.
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2006
Yay! I am honored, highly, highly honored. This has been an excellent weekend for me, and this topped it off, even though I knew it was coming. I wish I could squeal and give you a hug, like I wanted to when Sallyo mentioned Ferdinand in an essay as an example of "an excellent fictional vampire." The six stars aren't just thanking you, though. This is a well-written piece, conversational, yet helpful, and a worthwhile guide for any writer.
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2006
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You may be honored, but I almost wet myself over your comments and the stars. I just want the writers here to know what an accomplished artist you are. I don't think experience accounts for it. I think yours is the result of reincarnation. You are TOO good! Thank you for supporting my series.
Jay
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Well, in the sense that I am Taylor Calvin (Taylor being closest to me of all my characters) I am reincarnated. I know you like Derrick - there will be one more Derrick Jangoral story, and he will float in and out as a minor character in several works.
If you want to know about Derrick in his previous life, Riquaniuvant, read Waking Echoes. Riq was the prison guard of Ty, Taylor's avatar, and her friends kidnapped him. He fell in love with Taylor, became part of the team, and died for her. Interestingly, in their previous life (this wasn't intentional) Derrick was light-skinned and Taylor dark, and then they switched. Taylor was more powerful than Derrick, too.
Since I can't send you anything, and my member dollar stash isn't enough for a Pot of Gold, please consider Waking Echoes a Christmas gift for you.
As soon as these novels get published, I'm sending you a signed set.
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Oh, Raven! I would LOVE that! There IS a Santa Claus!
Bless you,
Jay
Comment from Jack Lewis
These chapters are getting better and better. I'm finding all of this very useful in my own work. Thanks !
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reply by the author on 10-Dec-2006
These chapters are getting better and better. I'm finding all of this very useful in my own work. Thanks !
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2006
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I appreciate your comments, Jack. I'm learning more and more about what I do as I write it. I hope you plan on coming along for the full ride. Thanks again
Jay