Love is what Matters
200 words12 total reviews
Comment from writer723
I found your story very interesting. It sounded like neither Sara nor Jacob found what they were looking for in a partner. They say there's someone for everyone. LOL! You demonstrated well what can happen when two people discover they have nothing in common intimately. Great job!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2020
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I found your story very interesting. It sounded like neither Sara nor Jacob found what they were looking for in a partner. They say there's someone for everyone. LOL! You demonstrated well what can happen when two people discover they have nothing in common intimately. Great job!
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2020
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Thank you.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
What a wonderful comeback. This has great humor. There is such a twist at the end. The beginning leads the reader in a certain direction. There there is a shaming bully. But she got hers. Well thought out.
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What a wonderful comeback. This has great humor. There is such a twist at the end. The beginning leads the reader in a certain direction. There there is a shaming bully. But she got hers. Well thought out.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from Mia Twysted
Any other man who was put into that situation may shy away from the woman after she said something like that to them. He however, stays strong and lets her know that she is not as important as him. It's a nice turn of events.
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Any other man who was put into that situation may shy away from the woman after she said something like that to them. He however, stays strong and lets her know that she is not as important as him. It's a nice turn of events.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello anonymous
Interesting flash Fiction about a sexual encountered. You followed the rules of the contest well. It's a fine entry for the 200 Word Story writing prompt contest. It's hard to write short stories, you did a good job. Good luck in the contest.
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Hello anonymous
Interesting flash Fiction about a sexual encountered. You followed the rules of the contest well. It's a fine entry for the 200 Word Story writing prompt contest. It's hard to write short stories, you did a good job. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
What a perfect entry for the 200 Word Story writing prompt. I do hope this entry does well in the contest! Best of luck to you!
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What a perfect entry for the 200 Word Story writing prompt. I do hope this entry does well in the contest! Best of luck to you!
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from Patty Palmer
LOL it's a wonder that it didn't deflate with that comment. Or maybe it did. I guess it's left up to the readers' imagination. The girl doesn't have much couth! I was a bit surprised at the content of the story and when I looked back I see that there was warning about sexual content. It's not that I wouldn't have read it because I would. The funny part is I didn't realize it and I was laughing while I read it because it wasn't what I was expecting! Good luck with the contest!
Patty
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LOL it's a wonder that it didn't deflate with that comment. Or maybe it did. I guess it's left up to the readers' imagination. The girl doesn't have much couth! I was a bit surprised at the content of the story and when I looked back I see that there was warning about sexual content. It's not that I wouldn't have read it because I would. The funny part is I didn't realize it and I was laughing while I read it because it wasn't what I was expecting! Good luck with the contest!
Patty
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from Debra White
Hello :)
Is it wrong that I found this really funny?! Sara deserved that reality slap after being rude about the size of Jacob's doodah!
I enjoyed the way you told this - you have an engaging tone and you paced the scene well.
Good luck in the voting booth.
Best wishes, Debra :)
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Hello :)
Is it wrong that I found this really funny?! Sara deserved that reality slap after being rude about the size of Jacob's doodah!
I enjoyed the way you told this - you have an engaging tone and you paced the scene well.
Good luck in the voting booth.
Best wishes, Debra :)
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from IndefinitelySmallx
This has a decent flow, but the biggest paragraph in the center seems a bit disruptive. The preceding paragraph has a typo ("form" instead of "from"). I liked the overall message.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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This has a decent flow, but the biggest paragraph in the center seems a bit disruptive. The preceding paragraph has a typo ("form" instead of "from"). I liked the overall message.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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Thank you
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Perfect comeback. Good for him! What a tactless witch--gorgeous doesn't matter, nor does size. Well done--good luck in the contest--not sure if the judges are uptight. Cheers. LIZ
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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Perfect comeback. Good for him! What a tactless witch--gorgeous doesn't matter, nor does size. Well done--good luck in the contest--not sure if the judges are uptight. Cheers. LIZ
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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Thank you. Did you think Jacob was good?
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He certainly gave a clever parting shot.
Comment from Lucy de Welles
Well, the only rule here is that story must be told with exactly 200 words. And I counted them. There are 200. Spot on.
Photo partially representative of story subject.
Aftertaste of sadness at the humiliation of human beings, and attempt to solicit laughter at their expense.
Typo:
(from) the bed in silence.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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Well, the only rule here is that story must be told with exactly 200 words. And I counted them. There are 200. Spot on.
Photo partially representative of story subject.
Aftertaste of sadness at the humiliation of human beings, and attempt to solicit laughter at their expense.
Typo:
(from) the bed in silence.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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Thank you, but what sadness? What humiliation?
Did you not see who Jacob was? When did he ever display any of those emotions or show any concern for Sara beyond her appearance?
Perhaps I didn't do good enough job. Thank you for reading.
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Remember. Reviews are nothing personal. It is the material that's reviewed. That can be done objectively and subjectively. Sometimes, when there is nothing objective to say, then one has to just report on one's feelings concerning the presentation. So that's what I did here. How I felt.
Art always evokes in the creator and the viewer, different feelings, emotions, points of view, perspective. That is why they say "art is whatever it means to the observer."
So, it's not about you doing or not doing a good enough job.
I only write to please myself. If I'm happy with what I've written, I have succeeded. If you are also happy with what I'm happy about, than the blessing is double, but not necessary. Because I'm already happy.
I hope you are happy with your work, regardless of what a reviewer does or doesn't say. Because if you are not happy with your work, then you should start over. If you are happy, then all is well. Happiness is the purpose of art!
Lucy
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Lucy, I am not critical of your review. It is not personal or about happiness. My point, was what was written was meant to convey a message. If the reader did not see that message, then I as the writer, did not effectively communicate it. That is on me.
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I would say that your assessment is correct.
It conveyed several messages. Don't know which one you were trying to convey, though.
There was only one contest rule. So you are home free.
I commend you for your kind response.
Have a nice evening.
Lucy