Dad Gone
The day he left.47 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Alcohol is claimed many victims indirectly. It is a terrible disease. I worked at a psych hospital for substance abuse patients. I changed my attitude to a much softer one after seeing the same patients come in time after time, their brain getting mushier and mushier and their health growing worse. Although, they, for the most part, were respectful. I can't remember if you've seen my poem Daddy Will You? This all makes me wonder if you were spared terrible longterm emotional pain with him leaving. Because even if he had stayed he'd be gone. I'm sorry you have that experience.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
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Alcohol is claimed many victims indirectly. It is a terrible disease. I worked at a psych hospital for substance abuse patients. I changed my attitude to a much softer one after seeing the same patients come in time after time, their brain getting mushier and mushier and their health growing worse. Although, they, for the most part, were respectful. I can't remember if you've seen my poem Daddy Will You? This all makes me wonder if you were spared terrible longterm emotional pain with him leaving. Because even if he had stayed he'd be gone. I'm sorry you have that experience.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
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Thank you, Liz. Yes, it almost ruined our family altogether, but it did not. I'm the one that survived the best thanks to my faith in God. I forgave my dad and his actions have no more power over me. We spoke just before my wedding in 1975 and he died a few days after I was married. Sad, he missed out on a whole lot. I'm so sorry for your experience, too, and will be over soon to review your post.
Sending you my best as always,
Sally xo
Comment from Carla Trinklein
I read this Friday but wanted to save it for when I had a 6 to give it. This spoke volumes to me. My father was not absent due to alcoholism, but rather die to clinical depression. Physically he never left, emotionally he was gone by the time I was a teenager. I'm so sorry you had to contend with this, but I believe your experience has made you the sensitive, eloquent writer that you are.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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I read this Friday but wanted to save it for when I had a 6 to give it. This spoke volumes to me. My father was not absent due to alcoholism, but rather die to clinical depression. Physically he never left, emotionally he was gone by the time I was a teenager. I'm so sorry you had to contend with this, but I believe your experience has made you the sensitive, eloquent writer that you are.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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Thank you very much for the wonderful review and personal comments, dear Carla. I?m so glad you thought of me and remembered to come back with your six. That means so much. I just cannot even express how much that means! I?m overwhelmed! I?m glad you could understand where I was coming from, but I just want to say I appreciate your story as well, and the courage to share it. It has taken me a long time to get this message out. I hope to write more in the days ahead.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally XO
Comment from Susan Morritt
Your poem is powerful in its simplicity and sparse style. Your final words stating that you hoped whatever was in "that" bottle was "worth it" clearly illuminates the pain and bitterness you have had to deal with as a consequence of your father's life choices. I can sympathize and find empathy. My father too was an alcoholic, though overall a devoted father, but in his later years, he dragged me into a horrible abyss as he drank himself to death. A disease, but one that does have a cure, if the patient desires it...
Susan
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2019
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Your poem is powerful in its simplicity and sparse style. Your final words stating that you hoped whatever was in "that" bottle was "worth it" clearly illuminates the pain and bitterness you have had to deal with as a consequence of your father's life choices. I can sympathize and find empathy. My father too was an alcoholic, though overall a devoted father, but in his later years, he dragged me into a horrible abyss as he drank himself to death. A disease, but one that does have a cure, if the patient desires it...
Susan
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2019
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Please accept my deepest condolences, Susan. My dad left is and would return from time to time. My mom finally broke free and left the state of Georgia, starting a new life in Florida. She was really my only parent. I am blessed to have had her. I learned to forgive and now live the life I had always dreamed of. My husband and I, along with our grown children and teenage grandson, don?t drink at all. A new day for me.
Thank you for the kind and comforting review. It means so much. Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo
Comment from Mark D. R.
Sally,
Sadly, it is the children who suffer then and later when they become adults. It takes strength to get on the right path to recovery.
They our selected photograph shows the pain of that loss - whether to alcoholism, drugs, or abuse.
Very nice presentation.
Mark
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2019
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Sally,
Sadly, it is the children who suffer then and later when they become adults. It takes strength to get on the right path to recovery.
They our selected photograph shows the pain of that loss - whether to alcoholism, drugs, or abuse.
Very nice presentation.
Mark
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2019
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Thank you very much for the excellent review and insightful comments, Mark. It is so appreciated.
Sending you my best today as well,
Sally ,+)
Comment from Debbie Pope
What a heartfelt post, Sally. Your message is powerful, and the simple way that you tell it makes it even more powerful. Your final sentence says it all. The way that you put it makes us realize that, of course, it wasn't worth it.
I'm glad that your life turned out so happy. No thanks to Dad.
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2019
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What a heartfelt post, Sally. Your message is powerful, and the simple way that you tell it makes it even more powerful. Your final sentence says it all. The way that you put it makes us realize that, of course, it wasn't worth it.
I'm glad that your life turned out so happy. No thanks to Dad.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2019
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Thank you for the sweet review, Deb. Your words and kindness mean so much.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sal xo
Comment from jenintorre
This is such a sad poem about a situation that happens all too often. The photo that you have chosen is heartbreaking. Very hard hitting words. Cheers. Jen.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2019
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This is such a sad poem about a situation that happens all too often. The photo that you have chosen is heartbreaking. Very hard hitting words. Cheers. Jen.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2019
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Thank you Jen, for the excellent review and kind words. It is so appreciated. The photo was a striking resemblance of the real me and took my husband?s breath away.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
This is heartbreaking. I had a science teacher that was great. Turns out he was an alcoholic. He died when he was drunk and fell down the stairs. His daughter posted a video to YouTube after the funeral comparing her dad to the man they talked about at the funeral. He had two sides and it was heartbreaking. Big hugs dear.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2019
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This is heartbreaking. I had a science teacher that was great. Turns out he was an alcoholic. He died when he was drunk and fell down the stairs. His daughter posted a video to YouTube after the funeral comparing her dad to the man they talked about at the funeral. He had two sides and it was heartbreaking. Big hugs dear.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2019
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Thank you very much, dear girl. Your review is so sweet and your words, comforting. Yes, my dad had two sides as well and would turn on a dime. I can certainly understand that. Thank you for the exceptional marks and six stars. It is greatly appreciated.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo
Comment from kahpot
Beautifully sad words and photo, this must have been heart breaking for one so young (any age really), to lose a loved one in that way, an excellent read on a very sad subject****kahpot
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2019
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Beautifully sad words and photo, this must have been heart breaking for one so young (any age really), to lose a loved one in that way, an excellent read on a very sad subject****kahpot
Comment Written 05-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2019
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Thank you, kahpot. Your kind words and review mean so much.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo
Comment from Loren .
My best friend is/was an alcoholic. One day we were talking about his drinking. He admitted embarrassed him. I asked him, that if you were sick, wouldn't you go to a doctor? Later that night I drove him down to a rehab center. He stayed for a month and came out changed. He finished college, went to law school and now has his own successful law offices. He also counsels other alcoholics, even meeting with them in bars. To me, alcoholism is a disease for which there is no easy answer. Thank you for sharing this painful memory and I'm sorry for the loss of not having him in your life in a more positive way. God bless, Loren
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2019
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My best friend is/was an alcoholic. One day we were talking about his drinking. He admitted embarrassed him. I asked him, that if you were sick, wouldn't you go to a doctor? Later that night I drove him down to a rehab center. He stayed for a month and came out changed. He finished college, went to law school and now has his own successful law offices. He also counsels other alcoholics, even meeting with them in bars. To me, alcoholism is a disease for which there is no easy answer. Thank you for sharing this painful memory and I'm sorry for the loss of not having him in your life in a more positive way. God bless, Loren
Comment Written 05-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2019
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Thank you very much for the kind and comforting review, Loren. I am delighted to hear about your friend.
Sending you my best today as,
Sal ,+)
Comment from WalkerMan
Your heart-rending poem about your own childhood trauma of watching an alcoholic father angrily leaving forever, bottle in hand, ought to be a poster on the wall at AA meetings and billboards as Wendy (A. Willow Bends) suggests. The illustration is enough to cause anyone with any compassion to mist up. Parental behavior resultant from addiction creates painful memories in a child which linger for a lifetime.
Clearly, alcoholism or any other addiction in a parent amounts to child (and spouse) abuse -- though it must be treated, rather than punished, to prevent family breakups producing effects such as the one illustrated.
You cover it all in just a few eloquently expressive words. Superb.
The one blessing that came from what you suffered is that you and Jackson raised your own children in a totally different atmosphere.
If you want this made into a poster, I can and will help you at zero cost.
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2019
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Your heart-rending poem about your own childhood trauma of watching an alcoholic father angrily leaving forever, bottle in hand, ought to be a poster on the wall at AA meetings and billboards as Wendy (A. Willow Bends) suggests. The illustration is enough to cause anyone with any compassion to mist up. Parental behavior resultant from addiction creates painful memories in a child which linger for a lifetime.
Clearly, alcoholism or any other addiction in a parent amounts to child (and spouse) abuse -- though it must be treated, rather than punished, to prevent family breakups producing effects such as the one illustrated.
You cover it all in just a few eloquently expressive words. Superb.
The one blessing that came from what you suffered is that you and Jackson raised your own children in a totally different atmosphere.
If you want this made into a poster, I can and will help you at zero cost.
Comment Written 05-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2019
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Thank you very much. What an honor and kindness coming from someone who is, without question, a wonderful husband and father. I always think about my Dad in the fall as this is the season he left us. Writing this came quickly along with the photo. Thank you for the kind offer to print. I own printers and have a trained staff that could easily help me as you have so graciously offered. Thank you, I just might do it. I wasn?t expecting such a grand response to this and can see I?m not alone. Your review means so much, overwhelming really. Thank you, again.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally
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You are most welcome, Sal. The help I am offering is hand-typesetting of the text in a font assuring optimal readability at a distance, combined with the illustration either side-by-side or vertically, at whatever resolution you want -- even 2400 dpi or higher -- optimized for CMYK printing. Then you may print on your own printers or anywhere else. All I need is discussion with you about the technical details. I can do it within hours at no cost to you. -- Mike
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You are so kind. I will discuss this with Jackson and she what he thinks. It can see this on the wall of an AA meeting. I suppose I really should do so,etching with it. It seems like it is a great way to remind those who are in the midst of this, that family relationships are so much more worth their love and dedication. Money, too. My family?s wealth and health was drained very quickly and it was expensive. Alcoholism kills everything.
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The picture is off pixabay. Free stock I think. How do we get permission to use that?
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Yep, it says free on the pixabay sight. Still, I?m not sure what that means exactly.
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You are welcome, Sal. Yes, and this could turn out to be the most effective poster AA ever had. That picture will draw eyes, and the poem will do the rest.
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Pixabay offers CC0 (Creative Commons Zero) images -- voluntarily Public Domain by the photographer, for ANY use, and without attribution. I have a Pixabay account and already have downloaded the maximum size image.
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By Pixabay site policy, you may download any CC0 image and use it in ANY way you choose -- including commercially -- even if you alter it.
I do recommend returning to the image's display page and clicking the button to donate to the photographer. He has only sixteen photos on the site so far, and this is by far the best of them. I'll put a fine-print credit to him on the edge of the image, out of courtesy; and that will include mention of Pixabay to give them a boost too.
If you end up deriving significant income from the posters, you can always go back and donate more to him. His beautiful picture is the most moving one I have ever seen of a young girl crying.
One more thing -- with your permission, I'll include your poem with this picture in the upcoming Third Edition of my Literary Art Book. -- Mike