thousand oaks
a 5 7 53 total reviews
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Survived grandparents are like thousand oaks, they grieve as some are missing on deaths in the family; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2018
Survived grandparents are like thousand oaks, they grieve as some are missing on deaths in the family; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 08-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2018
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Thanks for the review. More and more people grieving paints a sad picture. j
Comment from Lady Jane
mothersfathersfriends: mothers-fathers-friends
sistersbrotherschildrendogs: sisters-brothers-children-dogs
grandparents....grieving: grandparents- grieving - edit suggestion. I understand where you were going with 'blending' the words together, but I'm not sure the contest committee will find it as useful. You're still blending them this way, but in a cleaner manner.
Well penned and conceived entry into the contest. I wish you all the best of luck. Image is poignant and the content is relatable and extremely timely. A very sad situation, indeed. Good luck, dear writer.
janelle
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2018
mothersfathersfriends: mothers-fathers-friends
sistersbrotherschildrendogs: sisters-brothers-children-dogs
grandparents....grieving: grandparents- grieving - edit suggestion. I understand where you were going with 'blending' the words together, but I'm not sure the contest committee will find it as useful. You're still blending them this way, but in a cleaner manner.
Well penned and conceived entry into the contest. I wish you all the best of luck. Image is poignant and the content is relatable and extremely timely. A very sad situation, indeed. Good luck, dear writer.
janelle
Comment Written 08-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2018
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Thanks for the advice and review
I did put commas between and agree, much better. Cheers, j
Comment from country ranch writer
Need commas after each name to jumbled otherwise distorts what you want to say in this poem. Nice work up for your poem. It just needs fixing.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2018
Need commas after each name to jumbled otherwise distorts what you want to say in this poem. Nice work up for your poem. It just needs fixing.
Comment Written 08-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2018
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Thanks for the advice and review. I agree, much better this way. Cheers, j
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smiles