Sarcophagus
Horrible consequences often result19 total reviews
Comment from For better for verse
Great piece of writing, well crafted but very sad.
Makes you realise that just one half second of inattention can lead to such horrible consequences, and there no going back.
Well written.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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Great piece of writing, well crafted but very sad.
Makes you realise that just one half second of inattention can lead to such horrible consequences, and there no going back.
Well written.
Comment Written 22-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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Thanks. Appreciate your comments and the review.
Comment from LaRosa
The surprise story-teller, the grandfather, was an especially sensitive ending.
You have expressed the emotions every person experiences when forced to stand grave-side, and it really affected me. All in 100 words or less. Very well done.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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The surprise story-teller, the grandfather, was an especially sensitive ending.
You have expressed the emotions every person experiences when forced to stand grave-side, and it really affected me. All in 100 words or less. Very well done.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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Thanks.
Comment from Cybertron1986
A chilling and frightful piece that hit all the right notes to an all too familiar tragedy. The inclusion of the parents crying, along with the clear agony of the speaker, provided a strong sense of pain. Very well done for a flash fiction story.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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A chilling and frightful piece that hit all the right notes to an all too familiar tragedy. The inclusion of the parents crying, along with the clear agony of the speaker, provided a strong sense of pain. Very well done for a flash fiction story.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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Thanks. Appreciate the comments and review.
Comment from pbomar1115
I'm more willing to think that this dog is paying respect to the dead person. Animals have that capacity to grieve the loss of another animal. For that reason, I believe they grieve the loss of a person as well.
Phillip
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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I'm more willing to think that this dog is paying respect to the dead person. Animals have that capacity to grieve the loss of another animal. For that reason, I believe they grieve the loss of a person as well.
Phillip
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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Thanks. Appreciate your comments and the review.
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You're welcome, Brett.
Phillip
Comment from apky
What a very moving, very touching Flash Fiction, Brett.
The words are like knife wounds - stabbing again and again,
because the life gone, for the narrator, was far too young and
therefore far too valuable to go before them. This is always a
human tragedy - when parents bury their children instead of
the "natural" other way around.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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What a very moving, very touching Flash Fiction, Brett.
The words are like knife wounds - stabbing again and again,
because the life gone, for the narrator, was far too young and
therefore far too valuable to go before them. This is always a
human tragedy - when parents bury their children instead of
the "natural" other way around.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2018
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Thanks. Appreciate your comments and the review.
Comment from BeasPeas
Hi Brett. An excellent reminder of the carelessness and thoughtlessness of distractions while driving. Image is soulful and emotionally touching. Marilyn
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Hi Brett. An excellent reminder of the carelessness and thoughtlessness of distractions while driving. Image is soulful and emotionally touching. Marilyn
Comment Written 19-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Glad you enjoyed this posting. Appreciate the review.
Comment from TITAN BLACK1
This is very intriguing. For, you have a love
for animals...and the perpetrator who was
driving was really feeling bad, huh? Anyway
you did a good job writing this. Keep writing.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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This is very intriguing. For, you have a love
for animals...and the perpetrator who was
driving was really feeling bad, huh? Anyway
you did a good job writing this. Keep writing.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Appreciate the review.
Comment from doggymad
Excellent write in 75 words. You have also shared a very important message.
I can never understand what can be so important that people have to use their phones while driving.
Best of luck with this entry
hugs
Freda
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Excellent write in 75 words. You have also shared a very important message.
I can never understand what can be so important that people have to use their phones while driving.
Best of luck with this entry
hugs
Freda
Comment Written 18-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much. This was a little something I put together for this contest. Appreciate your comments and support. People being on their phones while driving is a big annoyance.
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello Brett,
Oh...your flash fiction packs a punch. It is gut wrenching. But the truths you speak of in your author's notes are important as well. I am surprised more lives are not lost with idiots on their phones constantly while driving. Some folks are just too ignorant or narcissistic to care. But perhaps someday they will...as you so poignantly point out in your well-crafted work.
Thank you!
diane
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Hello Brett,
Oh...your flash fiction packs a punch. It is gut wrenching. But the truths you speak of in your author's notes are important as well. I am surprised more lives are not lost with idiots on their phones constantly while driving. Some folks are just too ignorant or narcissistic to care. But perhaps someday they will...as you so poignantly point out in your well-crafted work.
Thank you!
diane
Comment Written 18-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Glad you enjoyed this piece. Guess I just get annoyed by people on their cellphones all the time while they are driving.
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Hi Brett,
A very sobering tale which sadly plays out constantly.
A fine entry for the contest with emotional build up and let down.
Unfortunately both are victims as one loses life and the other the ability to truly live.
:-) Shirley
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Hi Brett,
A very sobering tale which sadly plays out constantly.
A fine entry for the contest with emotional build up and let down.
Unfortunately both are victims as one loses life and the other the ability to truly live.
:-) Shirley
Comment Written 17-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Glad you enjoyed this little piece. People on their cellphones while driving I suppose are a real nuisance. Anyway, glad you enjoyed the story.