Comment from Margaret Snowdon

Excellent

There are a lot of pretenders in this world
But you my love, are the real deal
I'm blessed to know
you are mine

Mel, this is such a deep and meaningful poem you've written
about love from one who is honestly caring - there are so many lonely people out there who have not been blessed in finding that special one - such a lovely poem - good luck with the contest, my friend.

Margaret

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 21-Jan-2016

Thank you, Margaret. I am nervous waiting ...:)

Thanks for giving me a read a review, my friend.

Always,
Missy

Comment from pbroussard209

Excellent

what a great romantic poem. I really enjoyed it. I'm not sure when I realized I loved my husband, it was such a whirlwind romance and even when I married him I wasn't certain. Our love kind of grew and blossomed, over time.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 21-Jan-2016

Nice to hear, P. I am delighted for you both.
Thanks for this swell review, my friend.

Missy

Comment from Jumbo J

Exceptional

Hi Missy,
that hot pink font... whoa(((((( made my eyes work hard to adjust... but I guess everything worth having, reading or doing has got to make one work that little harder for the gain... hey?

... And now after reading it for the third time, I found myself crawling into an intimate space of consciousness within the feeling of... just trying to live your words to more than just a read or an appreciation of pouring one's heart out... yes, these words had a breath, a beat... 'a real'... beautifully done.

Okay, here it is... I believe... and this is only the way I chose to pause as I read... but consider some kind of a pause after abusers... whether that be another comma... an ellipse or hyphen... just needs that touch or air... and That word, "honesty" I would suggest the comma goes after 'honesty"... okay, I know I'm probably pushing it... but I'm not changing a word... and I guess it's in the interpretation of how I'm reading it... but just one more...
'I wish I could crawl right here...
inside your heart
(drop the 'and')
stay forever, where I know I'll be safe."

Now for where you have chosen to punctuate and then not... more so the periods...

I think if you want to use punctuation it should be uniform... maybe after every stanza? What do you think?

But as far as sentiment and heart goes lady with a capital 'M' I ended up reading this through more than ten times... and I love the personal flavour you stamped it with... yes, dear friend... all the very best wishes in this contest... this one will be hotly contested!

Hope my review was the one to take this into ALL TIME BEST... 'cause it does belongs there... sweet dreams.

With our thoughts we create,
integrity in love,
James vx's.

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 21-Jan-2016

Oh, James, thank you for all this splendid help, and the encouraging review you have left me :) I have made some adjustments. I am blessed indeed to have such a loyal friend to tell me what I need to hear. Please, never stop. I grown with each review.

With words of
encouragement, we
create life long bonds xx
Missy

Comment from mfowler

Excellent

This is quite a substantial and beautiful love poem. Your character admits to having loved her share of losers and that trust is hard to find, but in 'you', an honest man, true love is possible. A nice circularity to the experience of love expressed in a personal and loving way.
You've got the majority of this just right, but some punctuation choices could work better for you. I'll add notes to the text.

There have been many in my life
That I thought held the key to my happiness
Alcoholics, womanizers, abusers the lot. (add comma after 'abusers'. Helps emphasise 'the lot'.)

That word,"honesty" was foreign to me (remove comma)
Coming from any man.
But, you lived it (add full stop)

Love from you was honest
To be trusted
By my heart (add full stop)

I remember when I knew
I loved you
Almost to the very second (add full stop)

I was lying beside you (suggest removing 'I was')
My head on your chest
Listening to your heartbeat (add full stop)

I raised my head
Looked into
Those gorgeous blue eyes (add full stop)

Saying, with every ounce of my being
While my fingers traced
The outline of your heart (remove space between the stanzas so the words are disconnected from the statement 'Saying, with ...etc)

"I wish I could crawl
Right here inside your heart
And stay forever, where I know I will be safe."

There are a lot of pretenders in this world
But you my love, are the real deal.
I'm blessed to know you are ...mine.

I've note many full stops at the end of stanzas just to be consistent with your early paragraphs, but frankly, my dear (Clark Gable impersonation) you don't really need them at all as the end of a stanza has the exact same effect. Below is my cleaned up version. Feel free to ignore anything I've noted.
There have been many in my life
That I thought held the key to my happiness
Alcoholics, womanizers, abusers, the lot

Was on the edge of giving up ...on finding real love
Then there was you
Soft, caring and filled with honesty

That word "honesty" was foreign to me
Coming from any man.
But, you lived it

Love from you was honest
To be trusted
By my heart

I remember when I knew
I loved you
Almost to the very second

Lying beside you
My head on your chest
Listening to your heartbeat

I raised my head
Looked into
Those gorgeous blue eyes

Saying, with every ounce of my being
While my fingers traced
The outline of your heart
"I wish I could crawl
Right here inside your heart
And stay forever, where I know I will be safe."

There are a lot of pretenders in this world
But you my love, are the real deal
I'm blessed to know you are ...mine

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 21-Jan-2016

I wasn't sure what you wanted when you said...add full stop. I would like to ask you to look once again and see what you think. You have been a constant in my life here in FanStory and I hope you will continue to be. :) I feel myself growing through your help.
Thank you, Mark. Have a good time away :) You will be missed.

Missy

reply by mfowler on 21-Jan-2016

full stop...sorry..American English...period

reply by mfowler on 21-Jan-2016

Yes, reads much better now.

Comment from kittykatnoel

Excellent

A beautiful love poem. A wonderful entry for the contest and such happy, sincere, and encouraging words. Honesty, is such an endearing trait. Well done.

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 21-Jan-2016

Hi there KKN, thanks for the R&R :) I enjoy and grow with each I receive.

Always justafan,
Missy

Comment from William Ross

Excellent

Very nice a great love poem very well written very touching, sweet. a great write. good luck in the contest with this. have a great day.

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2016

Good mornin, William. Thanks for taking the time to read and review my work :) I believe coming here and getting "crit" from such wonderful writers ...I grow. :)

Always justafan,
Missy

Comment from scongrove

Exceptional

All I can say is ... WOW!!! Missy, after I read this, it left me with goose bumps all over my arms. This is perfectly put together and makes me think of my lover. Would you let me write this down in a blank card to give to my boyfriend for Valentine's Day? This is exactly how I feel. I am going to vote for you in this contest if it's still going on.
BRAVO! Clap, clap, clap! :)
Always your fan,
Shana :)

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2016

Heck fire, woman, SURE you can give to your love. Just use your very best sexy handwriting. lol. WOO-HOO!! Gonna be rockin at Shana's place, look out :)
Sadly this is to go before the Committee. I am scared chitless. Only entered a few and never successful. But, I will gladly take your virtual vote :)

MIssy

reply by scongrove on 20-Jan-2016

Thank you, Missy! He will love it. :)
Have confidence ... you're a very talented writer. :)

reply by the author on 20-Jan-2016

Hugs

Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

Well I hope for your sake that you've got it right this time. Trouble is we all think we have at the beginning. As the old song says

"For love it is pleasing and love is teasing,
Love is a pleasure when first it's new,
But as it grows older so love grows colder,
Fading away like the morning dew."

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2016

It is for a contest, Gynt. But, I appreciate you worrying about my love life...lol.
Thank you, sweetie for the lovely review :)

Missy

Comment from G.B. Smith

Excellent

Hello there Missy

This is superbly written
Whomever he is,
he is one fortunate man

Your artwork is magnificent
and sets it off
so well as does the red font
Bear

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2016

Hello there, Bear.

Thank you so much for this lovely review of my contest piece.
I am delighted that you loved the artwork and the font.

Missy

Comment from Linda Engel

Excellent

What a sweet tribute to true love found. Your words and expression give a lot of loving imagery and meaning. It is nice to read a poem of happy love and not a broken heart. Well done, Missy. You go girl. you knocked this one out of the park.

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2016

Thanks, hon, I am nervous as a hoe in church, in this competition. Don't think the committee likes me none too well.
A wonderful review from such an awesome poet is a good place for my head right now...thank you, Linda.

Missy