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Ain't That The Truth

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "senryu (haikus and senryus) "
Short poems poking fun at the human condition.

22 total reviews 
Comment from mermaids
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Good point in your words, does the strict syllable count really matter? I am always confused by the syllable count anyways, I would rather have students write poems and not be too caught up in the form.

 Comment Written 20-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 20-Aug-2015
    No the syllable count can't total more that seventeen in three lines, but it doesn't have to be 5-7-5 as contest prompts lead you to believe.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
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Does this mean I can't get into college?
senryu (haikus and senryus)
by Spitfire

I like your clever senryu about the intricacies of writing senryus and kaikus. You did an excellent job with the syllable count LOL sorry, it is funny because that is what your poem is about. Good job!

 Comment Written 20-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 20-Aug-2015
    Glad you laughed. Yeap, criteria for getting into Yale is tough. :-)
Comment from Walu Feral
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G'day Shari. Great job mate. I will tell you one thing....Old ferals are stummped as well when they have to be a mathematician to be able to write a poem LOL. Well done, cheers Fez

 Comment Written 20-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 20-Aug-2015
    Thanks, Fez. Hard to do when some cultures pronounce words differently.
Comment from IndianaIrish
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I always love your satire, Shari. You get right in there. Kids have a difficult time with things that technology has made easy for them. Telling time, figuring out change, and using a rotary dial phone has them in what's that land. Thanks for the smiles.
Karyn :-)

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 19-Aug-2015
    I remember 24 years ago, Chris brought his girl friend from college home. We had a record player and had to show her how to use it.
Comment from papa55mike
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Girl are you busy or what. I love this poem very well written. Those forms stump me and I'm 59. I'm always in awe at the talent it takes these small forms. I'm way too wordy. Have a great week and God bless, mike.

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 19-Aug-2015
    I didn't know these forms existed until I joined FS. They are a good way to learn how to tighten up work.
Comment from LateBloomer
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Hello Spitfire, Great modern-day senryu. What would today's world, especially the youth, do without a calculator and/or their computers? My favorite line:

high school students stumped

(Point made)

Sf, just sharing ... I was recently in a store with a teen cashier. The cash register had already computed the transaction and my exact change. However, I had to mess things up and give him, e.g. $20.02 vs. $20.00 ... the wait was not worth the nickle, dime, or quarter. Ohh, my heavens! The next time, I'll just take more pennies - lol ... we live in a "sorry" world.

A fun senryu. LateBloomer


 Comment Written 19-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 19-Aug-2015
    I hear you. It's like interrupting the rehearsed spiel of a telemarketer. He has to start over again to remember the rest. LOL
reply by LateBloomer on 19-Aug-2015
    Great analogy. Bloomer
Comment from Shirley B
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Hi Shari, Great poem. Not only are high school students stumped but I get confused sometimes. You are the master, my lady. Great job. Have a great night, Shirley

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 19-Aug-2015
    I never knew these forms existed until I joined FS. I must have skipped class that day. LOL Thanks for the wonderful compliment.
Comment from w.j.debi
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There probably is some poor student in the group that worries that they are just too dumb to get into college because the syllable count confuses him. Oh, the angst of the teenage years. The picture is perfect to compliment your writing. The students look so confused.

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2015
    Thanks, w.j. You get the picture. LOL
Comment from The Mom/DarleneThomson
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Such wonderful writing. It would take more than the inability to write haikus and senryus. You, however, know how to write everything and write it well. Kudos on a job well done.

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2015
    LOL. You haven't seen the sonnets I tried to write, but thanks for the faith anyway.
reply by The Mom/DarleneThomson on 18-Aug-2015
    Shari,
    I have great faith in you. You can do anything. Look at the mountains you have already climb.
    Blessings,
    Darlene
Comment from zanya
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A nice tongue-in cheek poetic glance at the whole business of syllable counts and haikus and senryus - this bunch of high school scholars sure do look 'stumped'- raises a chuckle

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2015
    Always good to see a new name on my screen. Glad you caught the satire in this.