Comment from Just2Write

Excellent

Ah, yes - how often has any one of us done something dumb while trying to appear smart. Alas, poor Sophie - seemed she had a keen enough eye to know it was Andy coming, but not enough to know that the river-bed was dry. Nice ironic twist at the end - Andy was going to ask the bespectacled girl out! (We always learned: Boys don't make passes at girls who wear glasses.) Maybe she thought she needed an edge to win his affections.

Anyway - great creative writing and rhyming. A light-hearted look at stupidity.

Rose.

 Comment Written 07-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014

Thanks, Rose.

This reminds me of the Darwin Awards which are awarded posthumously to those who have committed acts of such vast stupidity that they have permanently removed themselves from the gene pool...

Steve

Comment from ELumpkins

Excellent

Wonderful story put to rhyme. The picture presenting this piece was just the right picture, the Author has good taste. I must say though, Sophie dumping off a bridge didn't seem to be too bright, jumping off a bridge to impress some jerk, and not only jumping, she jumped into a dry river bead. Sad.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thanks for reviewing.

Steve

Comment from Nosha17

Excellent

Yes, we have Specsavers here, too, they are an English company started by a lady who was once poor! I loved your poem, except for the sad ending! But, I guess there was a message in there. Your rhymes were good, the use of language, also. Enjoyable read. Faye

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Faye, thanks for the review and the info - rags to riches, eh? There's hope for me yet....

Steve

Comment from Acquired Taste

Excellent

I truly enjoyed reading this - flowed quite nicely and I smiled throughout. My only negative (and not really a negative) is that the picture - to me - does not fit Sophie. Well, not in my mind. Nicely done.

regards, AT=/

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thanks for the kind words.

Steve

Comment from c_lucas

Excellent

Sometimes, plans are over done. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read. I enjoyed it.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thanks, Charlie

wouldn't put it past some kid to try this....

Steve

reply by c_lucas on 20-Jan-2014

Uou're welcome, Steve. Charlie.

Comment from lakeport

Excellent

Sophie and Andy, congratulation on your win, that's lovely atory poem with a sad ending ,I enjoyed reading it,nice rhyming. God bless you. Lakeport.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thank you!

Steve

reply by lakeport on 20-Jan-2014

your welcome,lakeport.

Comment from Keturah Martin

Excellent

This poem has very good rhyme and rhythm and flows sadly along while painting a vivid picture for the readers. The description is good. I wish you a blessed 2014.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thanks, Keturah - glad you enjoyed.

Steve

Comment from L.A.Matthies

Excellent

This is a terrible, tragic twist of fate for poor Sophie - if only she could see clearly. I love the storytelling, excellent use of rhyme and thoughtful word choices! Smiles!

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thanks for the kind words.

Steve

Comment from Dorothy Farrell

Excellent

Reading your author notes - we have Specsavers' slogans in England as well. Yours is far and away more drastic than any of theirs. Well written in rhyming couplets. Hopefully not too many teenagers are as crazy as Sophie - a drastic way to attract a boy. I found it amusing - when I should be sobbing LOL. Regards Dorothy

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thanks, Dorothy

It's OK - you're allowed to laugh at black humour - glad you got a chuckle.

Steve

Comment from GracieAnn

Excellent

kiwi, this is written with solid a-a-b-b-c-c and so forth rhyme. The meter flows well and adds to the build of curiosity as to what will happen. It is sick humor, and I did laugh. I can see it as an add on TV. :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2014

Thank you - I appreciate the laugh!

Steve