Reviews from

All Those Puzzling Pieces

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Butterfly Blue"
What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?

95 total reviews 
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Excellent
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Sharyn,

This was a unique premise for a poem. Although it is about a serious subject, I love that you wrote it in a very light-hearted way .... 'just wondering' type of a write. My fave line "what lies at the top of the roller coaster" .... a good way of putting it.

A very entertaining read. It captured and held my interest. Love the artwork, and the light blue background with dark blue print pops off of the page at the reader to help draw them int.

Very nice Sharyn!

bichonfrisegirl aka Connie

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 06-Apr-2013
    Bless you Connie - thank you so much - so glad you caught this one. :)Sharyn
Comment from allborn66
Excellent
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This is a wonderful poem. I love the theme, and how you express it. The tone is appropriate. I love the butterfly analogy. The picture is great.
Barbara

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 06-Apr-2013
    thx so much Barbara! :)Sharyn
Comment from Deborah Marie
Excellent
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Lovely poem, photo choice and questions asked. Your poem is "food for thought..." Set-up, progression, rhythm and flow make it an excellent read. Thanks for sharing, Deb

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 06-Apr-2013
    thx so much Deb! :)Sharyn
Comment from Tonulak
Excellent
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Yes, or maybe just faith. I'm OK with mystery, I guess I'll find out when i get there. Like Theodore Rothke's vilanelle: "I wake to sleep and take my waking slow/ I learn by going where I have to go":) HNice poem, my dear--Ted

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    thx Ted - see you there! :)))S
Comment from Walu Feral
Excellent
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G'day Sharyn. Sorry about my tardiness in reviewing, I have been out having fun and creating adventures for a few days and now I am way behind. I loved this piece as much as I love all of your work. You often leave me pondering about many things. I enjoyed the twist in this one, you made me hold my breat. Cheers Fez.

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    You just keep spinning those yarns Fez - you've really hit your stride! :)S
Comment from JM daSilva
Excellent
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This is a poem that brings together religion and philosophy. And a bit of sadness since nobody can prove anything since that's not a scientific issue. Great feat, huh?

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    not bad, not bad ... :)))
Comment from GeraldS
Excellent
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This is a well written, well constructed piece. The narrative seemed dark to me, probably due to the uncertainty at the end. Of course, none of us really know what awaits us. People have ideas and expectations, some of which are confounding to others, but it all boils down to a person's beliefs. The message of this poem is thought provoking. It does a good job of stirring the reader's imagination.

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    then it does the job Gerald - thx so much my dear! :)Sharyn
Comment from fairydancer
Excellent
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Hi Sharyn,
Some very thought-provoking questions here. Love your free style!! Great rhythm and occasional rhymes. Just flows so well. Excellent - Cally :)

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    thx so much Cally - I think my son pounds me with rap music, which is full of assonance and internal rhyming (as well as DISSONANCE of course!)
    :))Sharyn
Comment from Starlit Ink
Excellent
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It does come down to dust in the end, and that is a good reason to live with a wisdom of what is important. Your use of touches of rhyme in the free verse is very effective. I also like the questions that you ask, which make the reader think about destiny. It's a profound write that sees beyond the surfaces.

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    thx so much starlit! :))Sharyn
Comment from Taffspride
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Such beautiful expressive writing Sharyn. You ask something that of late I have been thinking about. If only we could know.

This beautiful poem certainly deserves the highest rating. My only question is the use of "floating like fairy light" somehow it seems out of place. Perhaps "floating feather like" or some such wording would have more impact. JMHO.

Thank you for sharing.

Iechyd da

Ann

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2013


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2013
    bless you for your lovely six on this one Ann - I changed that line as Ed Baldwin had suggested something different too - just made it "feather light" and I like it. Thank you for the suggestion (as well as that lovely sixer of course!)
    :)Sharyn